


Last Words of a Shooting Star

by baeconandeggs, JJC



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst with Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Aternative Universe - Dystopia, M/M, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Prostitution, Romance, Semi-Public Sex, Smut, Trust Issues, made up dystopia, mentions of child abandonment, slight emotional/psychological abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:55:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 60,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24187000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baeconandeggs/pseuds/baeconandeggs, https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJC/pseuds/JJC
Summary: This is a museum, they’re the art pieces, they’re here solely to be admired. And in a world where love is prohibited and considered a dangerous disease, Baekhyun and Chanyeol fall in love.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol, Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongin | Kai
Comments: 68
Kudos: 197
Collections: BAE2020





	1. Star

**Author's Note:**

> **Prompt:** BAE344  
>  **Disclaimer: baeconandeggs/the mods is/are not the author/s of this story. Authors will be credited and tagged after reveals.** The celebrities' names/images are merely borrowed and do not represent who the celebrities are in real life. No offense is intended towards them, their families or friends. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this fictional work. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> **Author's Note:** I am so happy I finally gathered the courage to partecipate in this fest after so many years as a reader! Dear prompter, I may have interpreted your prompt in the weirdest way possible, but I hope this is the dystopian au that you wanted. This was originally supposed to be a totally different fic, but then I found out that apparently the SM initials don’t stand for Lee SooMan but for Star Museum and I thought, uh, that’s an interesting idea. A big thank you to the hard-working mods that answered my infinite amount of questions and thank you so much to my dear beta A, your help and your lovely comments are what actually gave me the strength to finish this fic, and I kinda want to dedicate it to you. To all the readers, this is maybe a little more Baekhyun-centric than I intended, but I tried to put so many emotions and thoughts into this. I don’t know if I’m completely satisfied with it, but this sure was a great experience, and I'm lowkey sad it's all over now. It might not be the happiest fic ever, but I promise you it’s gonna have a nice happy ending! After all, it’s a story about hope and love, and I hope it brings comfort to you too, in these that are very hard times for everyone. Title comes from a Mitski’s song with the same name. Have a nice read! (Edit: I have a twitter account though it’s on private and I rarely use it, but if you wanna chat my dms are open: [@_mlyssa_](https://twitter.com/_mlyssa_))

“How features are abroad

I am skilless of, but, by my modesty,

The jewel in my dower, I would not wish

Any companion in the world but you,

Nor can imagination form a shape

Besides yourself to like of.”

-The Tempest, Act III Scene I

“ _ What are you thinking about _ ?”

It’s a question he heard plenty of times. Most of the time he simply answered “nothing”, and they would immediately leave him alone. Maybe they didn’t believe him, but he really was thinking about nothing. He thinks about nothing all the time, he wished he had some other thoughts in his mind, but there’s never something he would consider worthy of mentioning to other people.

It’s loud out there, on the stage. His expensive clothes are ready, his face is covered in makeup, his hair is dyed some different colour from yesterday, maybe it’s pink today, he doesn’t really know, to be honest. His hair changed so many times he doesn’t even remember what its original colour is supposed to be.

“Byun Baekhyun? Hello?”

“ _ Nothing _ ” he answers to the staff member that just passed by to check on him. It’s a man, dressed all in black with a notepad and a series of names written on it. He has never seen him before, maybe he’s new. “I’m thinking about nothing, I’m just tired”.

“Good” the man simply nods, looking at the sheet of names, without really worrying too much about Baekhyun’s answer. “Then at least try to look a little more alive. You’re next”.

_ Look more alive _ , he said.

Now, that’s funny, that’s a thing he has never heard before.

He always thought he was a good liar, making everyone believe that he was enjoying life, that he was actually  _ feeling _ something. But there was never nothing to feel, there was no life to begin with. There was just work, and showing, and appearances, and entertainment and nothing else.

Baekhyun pulls out his best smile, stays straight and gets ready to hit the stage for what was probably the millionth time in his life.

The next thing he knows is that there are lights in his eyes, and the stage feels so, so cold. There are plenty of people applauding and howling, all there in front of him, cheering for him.

He doesn’t feel anything. This is what he should expect from his life: go on stage, make the people see you, make the people enjoy you, make them admire you, make them fall in love with you, make them feel bad they are not you.

It was always about making  _ them _ feel something.

_ Look more alive,  _ the staff member behind the stage said to him.

Yes, he could certainly look alive if he wanted to, but he doesn’t know if there ever was a single moment in his life where he  _ truly _ felt alive. 

Their watches strike 5 a.m. when Kyungsoo finally manages to light the goddamn match he’s been rubbing since what feels like forever. It’s still dark outside since the sun has barely started peeping out, so the light of the match is the only thing illuminating the room right now.

Baekhyun can narrowly see the contours of Kyungsoo’s face, the way his eyebrows frown in concentration, and his heart-shaped lips finally relax once he lights the match.

“Congratulations, it only took you ten minutes to do it,” Baekhyun jeers, bringing his face closer to the flame so he can  _ finally _ light his cigarette.

“Shut up, you didn’t even do anything!” Kyungsoo whispers while also lighting his cigarette, then he wiggles his wrist so that light can go away. “I did all of the work, all you’ve done is complaining and saying how ridiculous I looked. So now smoke your damn cigarette and be thankful.”

Right after the first drag, Baekhyun is genuinely surprised by the quality of the cigarette.

“These are good!” he coos, looking at the package. “Where do you even get these?”

“I have my ways.”

Baekhyun chuckles at his reply, because no matter how hard his best friend tries to look cool, he simply is so naturally cute. His stupid new haircut certainly doesn’t help him, with his dark bangs falling straight till his eyes and covering most of his forehead, making him look like he’s seventeen again. Kyungsoo hates this new haircut, but Baekhyun can’t deny he looks absolutely adorable in it.

Kyungsoo would probably kill him if he said it out loud.

Baekhyun watches the cigarettes burn for a while, thinking how utterly dumb Kyungsoo looked while attempting to light the match. They aren’t allowed to use matches, let alone smoke; hell, their managers would probably lose their mind if they knew just how badly he and Kyungsoo are treating their precious vocal cords right now, but he doesn’t really care. The Museum doesn’t allow him to do  _ anything _ , a couple of smuggled cigarettes won’t hurt anybody.

They both lie down on Baekhyun’s bed, facing the grey ceiling. They have to wake up in an hour, but they usually decide to meet and smoke this early in the morning, so the smell will have enough time to go away by the time they’ll finish working. It’s winter and it’s freezing outside, but they have to keep the window open.

“I am so tired I could literally fall asleep right now and set fire to my whole room,” Baekhyun whispers at one point.

“Honestly, same.” Kyungsoo takes a break from talking to take a drag from his cigarette. “Tell me why the fuck we thought that smoking at 5 a.m. was a good idea.”

“Shhh, stop swearing! Junmyeon sleeps in the next room, what if he hears you?”

“Oh please, Junmyeon sleeps like a sloth! Plus, even if he’d heard us, he wouldn’t do anything about it. He’s scared to death of Jungsoo and the Director.”

“You’re too mean.” Baekhyun closes his eyes, breathing the lovely nicotine in. “Junmyeon is a nice guy.”

“Yeah well, that’s your opinion. In my opinion he’s fucking lame.”

“Oh, shut up!” Baekhyun giggles, trying to shove Kyungsoo off the bed, but he quickly renounces the idea when Kyungsoo threatens to do the same.

They first met when Kyungsoo first came to the Museum for his audition when he was sixteen, Baekhyun just casually passing by. They met again at eighteen, when they both became Artpieces, and have been friends ever since.

They probably first started bonding over their love for singing, but Baekhyun thinks that the reason why their friendship lasted this long is because they both don’t like to talk about themselves. Baekhyun considers Kyungsoo his best friend - well he’s his  _ only  _ friend, as a matter of fact – and yet, he barely knows anything about him. They are both introverts and they don’t like to push each other with questions, and that’s why it works so well: Baekhyun knows just a few things about his family, where he was born, when his birthday is, and the same can be said for Kyungsoo.

It's a strange, weird friendship indeed, but Baekhyun doesn’t find a problem with it. It makes him feel comfortable, thinking about the fact that he’s not exposing too much of himself, and that Kyungsoo makes a perfect job in not trying to push too hard into knowing him on a deeper level.

They keep smoking even when the first light of the morning creeps in through the small windows and the room colours in blue.

“What do you think Japan looks like?” Kyungsoo breaks the silence at some point.

Baekhyun just laughs in return. Even though he’s known him for almost eight years, he sometimes can’t understand how Kyungsoo’s mind works.

“What kind of a random question is that?”

“I don’t know! I’m sorry, I’ve never been to Japan, I was just wondering!”

“And how the hell am I supposed to know?”

“Look, forget it, it was just a stupid question anyway”.

Kyungsoo abruptly stands up, moving away from the bed, causing Baekhyun to immediately stop laughing. He didn’t realize that he was actually being serious. Kyungsoo goes in front of the window, smoking the cigarette with his face half outside the building, shivering a little because of the cold.

“You know, I’ve read a book about Tokyo once, maybe I could find it for you if it’s still in the library,” Baekhyun says, hoping Kyungsoo is close enough to hear him. The cigarette is almost over. “There is a street in Shinjuku called  _ Omoide Yokocho _ , which literally translates to Memory Lane. And it’s just a narrow tiny street, right there in the middle of the city, full of tiny restaurants that sell nothing but yakidori.”

The People’s Star Museum of Seoul was located right in front of the Han River. This made Baekhyun think that he was lucky from this point of view, getting the one large room that faced directly on the waters. At times it made him less lonely, less trapped maybe.

He finds a special beauty in waking up before the sun rises and watching the colours of the city from his own room. Seeing the buildings on the other side painted pink, hearing the trains passing one after the other above his head, seeing businessmen walking in the streets with their suitcase in hand, and of course the beautiful sight of the river glowing under the sun rays.

“I don’t know why I said that... I just thought it was a nice name.”

The river sometimes reminds him of his mother. He doesn’t really have any memory of her smiling, but he remembers one particular time, when they were outside during her free hours and they went for a walk along the riverside. She stopped at some point, without a reason and she just stood there, staring at the river in silence. She didn’t really look happy though, but she did look calm, and that’s probably the memory about her that he likes the most. That single moment when the river made her feel calm.

Kyungsoo doesn’t say anything for a while. He just stares at the window in silence, until Baekhyun hears him talk again:

“Let’s go there together” he whispers in a low voice. “When we get out of here. Promise we’ll go there together.”

Baekhyun just laughs.

“Of course, I promise. You’re not gonna get rid of me that easily”.

Finally, Kyungsoo looks at him. He’s smiling and Baekhyun smiles back.

They just made a promise. They made plenty of promises since the days they became friends, most of which included the phrase “when we get out of here”, but Baekhyun doesn’t know if that will ever happen. He doesn’t know when or even  _ if _ any of these adventures they always dream about will ever happen, but he wants to believe it’s true, he just wants to have this little tiny hope that they will one day go to Tokyo together and taste the yakidori in  _ Omoide Yokocho _ . Maybe it will happen when they’re both old and grumpy, but it  _ has _ to happen. It's the only thing he wishes for.

And yet, why is he always so scared?

Kyungsoo is an adventurer, he always talks about wanting to leave this place and run away as far as possible from Seoul to go see the world, and Baekhyun wants it too, he wants to leave this life behind, but he’s also afraid of too many things.

Baekhyun doesn’t say anything to Kyungsoo, though. He just throws away his cigarette and decides it’s finally time to rest. He hears Kyungsoo joining him a little later, when he hears someone quietly sliding under the thick covers.

Baekhyun is so tired that it only takes a few minutes for him to fall asleep.

In his sleep, he dreams about Japan.

They sleep for what feels like thirty seconds before their watches start ringing. Baekhyun  _ hates _ that sound with a passion; it’s loud, it’s annoying, and the constant  _ beep beep  _ makes him want to put a bomb on his wrist so he could finally get rid of that damn watch forever. If they just changed the alarm sound, waking up every day would feel a lot less agonizing.

6 a.m. as usual. Not even ten second pass when they hear Junmyeon’s usual knock at the door. After the sound of the morning alarm, that’s the sound that Baekhyun hates the most.

“Nngh, coming!” he groans, when he hears the knocks getting louder and more insistent. The exasperation takes him out of bed, while Kyungsoo is a little harder to convince. He groans and swirls on the bed until he’s safe inside a cocoon of covers with his back turned to the door.

When Baekhyun opens the door Junmyeon’s glorious flaming red hair is the first thing that greets him.

“Good morning, Baekhyun, hope you slept well! And… oh, is that Kyungsoo?” Junmyeon’s bubbly persona suddenly shifts when he sees the recognizable cocoon of sheets on his bed. This isn’t the first time Kyungsoo sleeps in his room, but somehow Junmyeon visibly starts sweating whenever he sees the possibility that something might get him into trouble with the higher-ups.

Now, Baekhyun doesn’t blame him. He’s been here for only three years and this is the first time that they give the role of Head of Department to someone this new. And being both an Artpiece and Head of their Department, Junmyeon must feel a lot of responsibility on himself. But, sadly for him, one of Baekhyun’s worst habits is going against the rules.

“Yep, that’s Kyungsoo. He slept here,” Baekhyun answers, after a long yawn.

Junmyeon’s eyes are open wide and round. He tightly grips the shoulder strap of the bag he’s carrying.

“Baekhyun, we already talked about this, you’re not allowed to make anyone enter your room beside yourself and- “

“Yeah, and you. I know, I know, I’m sorry.” Baekhyun knows very well Junmyeon is pissed. That’s not really his problem though. “It won’t happen again. But Kyungsoo was really sick tonight, he had uhm… diarrhoea”.

“ _ Fuck off! _ ” Kyungsoo tries to throw a pillow at Baekhyun, completely missing his target. Baekhyun quietly snickers, Junmyeon however doesn’t find the situation funny at all.

“I’m serious! He was in the bathroom, sitting on the toilet all night and a terrible smell- oh, Junmyeon, we had to keep the window open because that  _ smell- “ _

“I get it, that’s enough!” Junmyeon abruptly shouts, making Baekhyun snicker again. “But if he was that sick, he should have called me, or gone directly to the infirmary. You both know this is straight up against the rules.”

“I know, and I’m sorry, but I just couldn’t leave a friend in need!” Baekhyun conjoins his hands and pouts. “Please, please don’t tell anybody.”

Baekhyun didn’t really think that Junmyeon was a gullible person the first time he met him. He wasn’t strict, but somehow, he looked very serious. The truth is Junmyeon isn’t gullible at all, he is just terrified of the higher-ups. Which means he will always find an excuse to overlook any little problem if you manage to look sorry enough.

“Fine, I won’t! But Baekhyun-” Junmyeon looks into Baekhyun’s eyes, pointing at him, in an attempt to seem more convincing. “This is the last time it happens.”

“I swear it is.”

It probably won’t be.

“Okay then,” Junmyeon sighs, while opening his bag. “here’s your vitamins and well, I guess I should also give you Kyungsoo’s at this point.”

Junmyeon opens the zip of his bag and briefly searches inside. He takes out two identical vials full of tiny blue pills, the vitamins that the Artpieces are assigned to take every morning. He hands them both to Baekhyun. There are large labels on both of the vials, the only thing written on them is their names.

“Is he fine, by the way?” Junmyeon whispers, peeking at Kyungsoo. “Should I call the Doctor or…?”

“Nope, he’s okay now, thanks boss!” Baekhyun quickly says, before closing the door to his face.

“Come on, wake up, diarrhoea boy!” he whoops, throwing Kyungsoo’s vial on the bed, which coincidentally falls directly on his best friend’s cocoon. “Your vitamins are here.”

“I hate you so much,” Kyungsoo grumbles, but still straightens up to take the vial. Baekhyun slumps on the bed beside him, laughing at how his hair is all over the place.

They take the pills at the same time.

“I always wondered why they taste like nothing,” Baekhyun mumbles, while he and Kyungsoo are biting the pills. “Aren’t vitamins supposed to be sweet? Every time it’s like I’m chewing fucking air.”

“I’m thankful that they taste like nothing. Nothing is certainly better than bad.”

Baekhyun stares at his vial for a second, keeping it between his thumb and index. He looks at it under the blinding lights of his room, admiring the gigantic  _ Byun Baekhyun _ written on it, thinking about what Kyungsoo just said.

_ Nothing is certainly better than bad. _

Baekhyun grips at the sheets of his bed, looks at his room, his lovely, comfortable room.

He doesn’t know if he can agree.

Wake Up Call at 6 a.m., each Head of Department will knock at the Artpieces’ doors and give them their assigned vitamins, one hour to have breakfast in the canteen downstairs, then thirty minutes to have a shower. Then directly to the styling, clothing, hair and makeup so they’re all ready to show up for the opening of the Museum at 8.30. Always the same, every single morning. Everything gets notified by appearing on their watches, so they won’t be late for anything.

After Kyungsoo leaves, Baekhyun carefully hides the cigarettes inside one of his socks in his nightstand drawer, so the security won’t find them.

He goes downstairs to the canteen for breakfast and sits next to Kyungsoo like always; tries to get some coffee but he’s still dead tired even when he gets to the styling. The hairdressers discuss for a few minutes before eventually deciding they’ll have to dye his hair red again. They schedule an appointment for him on Thursday evening, which immediately gets noted on Baekhyun’s watch.

Inevitably, Baekhyun falls asleep while they’re doing his makeup. When he wakes up his face is completely done, his makeup so beautiful and flawless. He watches his reflection for a few seconds, contemplating how the gold and pink blend perfectly on his eyelids, with a touch of eyeliner and glitters sparkling all around.

“Didn’t get any sleep last night?” he hears a soft chuckle, when he turns, he sees Kim Jongin, the often labelled “ _ most captivating Artpiece of the Museum _ ”, is sitting on the chair right next to him.

Baekhyun studies Jongin’s makeup for a moment, noticing right away that they gave them two very different styles. Jongin’s makeup is very natural, almost unnoticeable and he’s wearing the simplest wardrobe: denim black pants and a white button down. Yet, he looks utterly gorgeous.

“No… I-” Baekhyun tries to sit more comfortably on his chair. “I just slept badly.”

“When Junmyeon came to my room he was so gloomy.” Jongin chuckles, showing Baekhyun his dazzling smile. It always astounds him how Kim Jongin can be so naturally charming. “It was so funny. He had this angry face and he kept muttering “ _ Byun Baekhyun, I swear this is the last time _ ”.

“Wait, he really said that?” Baekhyun tries to laugh with him, but he ends up not sounding too convincing.

“No.” Jongin stares at him with a smirk on his lips. “But I just know that every time he’s angry it’s probably because of you.”

Baekhyun doesn’t know why Jongin is being like this to him. He has always been aware of the fact that almost every other Artpiece in this Museum doesn’t like him, because he’s always been the Director’s favourite, and he gets all of the attention and the spotlight. Kyungsoo was the only one who didn’t care too much about stuff like this, that’s why Baekhyun never had a friend in the Museum beside him.

And he knows Jongin has every right to hate him: he is such a particular person, and Baekhyun understands very well why everyone loves him. He is so beautiful, so likeable and so eye-catching. Kim Jongin is simply irreplaceable. He was born to be an Artpiece, and if Baekhyun wasn’t here, Jongin will easily be the one to take his spot as the Museum’s main attraction.

“Hey, what’s up with you today?” Jongin asks him, still snickering. “You know, I’m sorry if I sounded rude, I was just trying to make friends.”

“Well, I’m not here to make friends.” Baekhyun says dryly.

And it’s the truth, Baekhyun doesn’t want anyone here to be his friend. He’s too scared of letting people in, because he’s afraid of all the weaknesses they could find in him. That’s why Kyungsoo is the exception, he never tried to learn about his weaknesses. Having people you care about in the Museum makes you vulnerable, Baekhyun knows it very well.

“Oh, I get it…. But that’s alright, you know?” Jongin doesn’t stop smiling at him. “After all, we are here to make a scene, right Baekhyun?”

Baekhyun knows perfectly what he’s talking about, but it’s rare to hear someone say it out loud. They are the spectacle, and they are here to make a spectacle, only show and please, they’re not here to have fun. He and Jongin could be friends, if only this place didn’t force them to be so distant from one another. But that’s how the Museum is supposed to work after all, and neither him nor Jongin have the power to change that.

Their conversation gets interrupted when Jongin’s watch suddenly beeps, notifying him that they’re ready to get him on his case.

“Well, looks like I have to go.” Jongin winks at him before standing up from his chair. Baekhyun tenses a little.

“See you out there, Baekhyun.” he salutes, before slowly sashaying towards the room’s exit. Even the way he walks is charming. Before Jongin can get through the door, though, he suddenly makes a turnback. “Oh, I almost forgot! Could you please tell Kyungsoo that he sounded really good at his performance yesterday?”

Baekhyun is a little perplexed. He didn’t even know Jongin and Kyungsoo talked to each other.

“How do you- “

Jongin doesn’t let him finish. He concludes with a brief: “Thank you,” and turns around.

And with that, Kim Jongin disappears.

Finally, a few minutes later, Baekhyun also gets the message on his watch. He arrives at the central room of the empty Museum, where the masterpieces, the best of the best is, and where his glass case is located right in the middle of it. Kyungsoo is in the next room, while Kim Jongin’s spot is right next to him, the boy already sitting inside his glass case, smiling at him. Baekhyun doesn’t smile back.

Two staff members open his glass case and they wait till he walks inside, without daring to look at him. Baekhyun thinks it’s funny how everyone who works here treats the Artpieces as if they’re royalty. Sitting inside a glass case every day for eight hours doesn’t feel very royalty-like.

While Baekhyun sits on his chair, the staff members finally close the glass case and for a moment it feels like the whole world just got muted. All the sounds around him are now muffled and he’s completely alone, inside the case with blinding lights all pointed at him. He looks at his surroundings for a moment. It is really a beautiful room, with paintings hanging from the wall and a gigantic golden fresco on the ceiling. Too bad the visitors never care to notice that.

When his watch beeps again, he knows it’s starting.

It’s 8.30 and the Museum is now open.

It’s always the same routine. He sits there, inside his glass case for hours, doing absolutely nothing. He knows there’s a tiny silver plate, down at his feet, the words written on it are:  **_Byun Baekhyun, from Seoul. 24 years old._ **

He watches the people come and go. They walk in front of him, almost everyone stops in front of his glass case, they sometimes take pictures of him with their cell phones, they stare at his face for what feels like decades, admiring his features, his makeup, his body, his clothes. Sometimes there are art students, and those are the ones that Baekhyun prefers the most, because they’re the only ones who take their time to observe him. They usually sit on the tiled floor, with their sketchbooks on their lap, and they proceed to study and draw him in every detail.

This is a museum, they’re the art pieces, they’re here solely to be admired.

Everything flows like any other day. The visitors come in, they stare, they share comments and then they leave. Everything is silent, until Baekhyun sees a mother walking towards his glass case, hand in hand with her young daughter. He tries to smile at the kid, gently waves at her, but the girl seems uncomfortable.

“Mummy, but why did they lock him in there?” he hears the kid asking. “Is he happy inside the cage?”

_ Cage _ .

Baekhyun’s heart clenches. He suddenly feels trapped, the glass case becoming smaller every passing second. The art students are still sitting on the ground, working unbothered on their sketchbooks. The mother smiles at her daughter.

“Of course he’s happy, darling! They all choose to work here.”

His world is rapidly shrinking, and Baekhyun can’t look at them anymore. The mother and the young girl disappear as soon as he tries to look around. He sees all the visitors passing in front of him, sees the bunch of girls giggling and camping in front of Jongin’s case, Jongin smiling and posing for them.

After all, they’re all here to make a scene.

Baekhyun closes his eyes and tries to calm down. He imagines to be somewhere else, somewhere where he would rather be right now: maybe in one of the places that he read about in books, or in  _ Omoide Yokocho _ eating yakidori with Kyungsoo, or with his mother, holding her hand and silently walking along the Han River.

The Artpieces work each day till the Museum closes at 5.30. They have to get their makeup removed and show up for dinner at seven. Baekhyun still has other schedules for the week: singing practice on Monday, workout on Wednesday. After they’re done with the schedules, they are free to go out of the Museum for four hours, with their curfew set at midnight.

They can use a special permit to have the whole day free for personal reasons, but other than that, that’s the only time of the day when they can get outside of the Museum.

Every night, however, the Museum’s auditorium sets a performance open for the public, and each Artpiece is assigned to perform once a week. Tickets prices vary depending on the day, with Saturday being the most expensive one. Saturday, which is also the so-called “ _ Baekhyun’s day _ ”.

Sometimes Baekhyun forgets he’s supposed to be the main attraction of the Museum. Which is kind of ironic, considered that the museum is literally called the People’s Star Museum of Seoul, but he’s the only one that is treated as such.

“ _ You are the star of this museum, Baekhyun _ ,  _ they all came here just to see you _ ,  _ this place wouldn’t be the same without you.” _

He knows from Boa that the managers and the staff call him “the Starchild”, but Baekhyun doesn’t really like that nickname. It gives too much consideration, too many expectations.

The Saturday performance is always centred around him, so the other people that play before him are presented as the opening act. They are given considerably less time on the stage than him, their performances are often minimal.

However, Baekhyun often sneaks out of the makeup room after they’ve finished with him, just to hear some of those songs. They always sound so beautiful, always so true, they usually sing like they’re the only people in the room. They give everything they have, even though they are aware that the people in front of them probably didn’t come here to hear them. And Baekhyun doesn’t want to be the Starchild, he wants to be like them. He wants to know how to sing like that, like someone that actually cares about their songs. He wants to stop feeling this sense of discomfort every time he gets on that stage.

Baekhyun hides backstage for a while, running away from everyone, just to hear a glimpse of those performances.

“Baekhyun? Oh, here you are! You’re always hiding somewhere strange!” He hears Boa’s high heels making their way towards him. His personal manager is somehow constantly looking for him, making sure everything is perfect before her pupil, her favourite project,  _ the Starchild, _ performs.

“Are the clothes too tight?”

Baekhyun shakes his head.

“Have you gotten your makeup checked?”

Baekhyun nods.

“Do you remember all of the lyrics?”

Baekhyun nods.

Boa makes him answer about a hundred questions every time. Once she’s finished, she always starts massaging Baekhyun’s shoulders to help him relax, while whispering useless info about the song he’s going to sing, to make sure he remembers them perfectly.

“Song title is  _ My Love _ , written especially for you by songwriters and composers Choi Inhwan and-”

Baekhyun doesn’t care about anything that Boa’s saying. His attention is only dedicated to the boy singing on stage right now.

“He’s really good, isn’t he?” he whispers to Boa, without even thinking. Boa stops her infinite talking and glances past his shoulder, to the boy singing on stage.

“I mean, his vocals are pretty average, but he has a cute face” Boa says, staring at the boy intently. “What’s his name? Park Chansung…?”

“Park Chanyeol,” Baekhyun immediately corrects her. He knows his name from all the times they announced it right before his performances.

Right now he’s singing a foreign song called  _ Creep _ , as Park Chanyeol had announced before sitting down on a wooden stool and taking his acoustic guitar in his arms.

“Ah, yes, I know his manager, Yunho. I should probably tell him that he definitely needs to practice more with that guitar. And singing a song in English… god, what was he thinking?”

Baekhyun doesn’t agree, but he doesn’t say it to her. He doesn’t care if Park Chanyeol’s vocals aren’t perfect, if his guitar playing skills are average, if he doesn’t understand anything the song is saying. Not when he sounds so beautifully, when he sings like he actually believes in those lyrics. Baekhyun doesn’t know what the song is saying, but he just feels it all through that guitar, through that voice.

He couldn’t do that, he could never sing a song like this. His songs sound good, and are often written especially for him, Baekhyun works on them for weeks, so he knows very well how they are supposed to be sung and how they are supposed to sound. Everything is calculated till everything is perfect down to the smallest detail, but it’s never about feelings. He doesn’t know how to make a song work solely on feelings.

Park Chanyeol finishes his song with a major chord and the audience lazily claps for a few seconds.

Baekhyun doesn’t stop watching, not even when Chanyeol leans into the microphone and whispers “Thank you, that was  _ Creep  _ by Park Chanyeol”, then gets up, throwing his guitar on his shoulder and quickly walking off stage.

Chanyeol passes next to where Baekhyun and Boa are standing; he lowers his gaze as soon as he sees them.

“You sounded really good,” Baekhyun tries to tell him, with a soft smile on his lips.

Chanyeol ignores him.

It’s Baekhyun’s turn now. Differently from everyone else, the crowd cheers loudly this time.

“Are you okay, my boy?” Boa keeps massaging his shoulders, seemingly more excited than Baekhyun about the performance. “Looks like there are more people attending this time. Don’t worry too much about it and focus solely on the playing and the singing- “

“I know, I did this a million times already. I know how it works.”

Boa suddenly stops, taking a few steps back to look at him.

“You really are a rare gem, you know?” Boa shows him a delightful smile. “You’re just so… natural, you’re probably the best Artpiece I ever managed. I’m really proud of you, my Starchild.”

When the staff passes by and warns him that he’s going out in a minute, Boa finally leaves.

There was a time when Baekhyun truly liked performing. It was sort of exciting, being eighteen and performing in front of strangers for the first time, constantly worrying over the smallest mistakes and knowing the fulfilment that a crowd cheering for you can give.

But now it’s nothing like that. His heart is so worn out he doesn’t even feel like a real person anymore. And he’s tired, he’s so damn tired of being an attraction, of being just an idea in people’s mind.

_ Here comes the Starchild, the main attraction, the big finale, the brightest of stars, make everyone proud, my Baekhyunnie, remember this, so they will love you, cherish you, they will never leave you and they won’t replace you for anything in the world _ .

He doesn’t feel anything.

Hearing the crowd cheering, hearing Boa’s praising and the idea of going out there on his own, it’s just plain nothing.

When he gets there, and all the lights are on him, he has to bow and give his best smile to the audience, none of these things mean anything to him. Even when he sits at the piano and starts singing, he still feels nothing.

_ His mother had a really nice voice. He never knew who his father was, but it’s most likely that he got his beautiful voice from her. She always used to sing earlier in the morning, before they came to knock at their door at 6 a.m. _

_ “Baekhyunnie” she whispers in his ear. “Sunshine, wake up”. _

_ Baekhyun is seven years old, he’s comfortably sleeping on his mother’s lap and he doesn’t want to wake up. The sun is still not fully up, but he can hear the sound of the cars’ honks outside. They’re lucky to have the largest room that faces directly on the Han River. He stirs, trying to repress the sound of his mother calling for him. But she’s very persistent. _

_ “Baekhyun, please, I need to tell you something very important.” _

_ “Mum, what is it?” a soft mumble, Baekhyun trying to hide his face against her stomach. _

_ He hears her breathing heavily. She’s probably crying, she always is. He doesn’t dare to look. _

_ “I’m so sorry,” she murmurs, her voice instantly breaking. “I’m so sorry, I love you so much, please forgive me for everything, my love”. _

_ Baekhyun doesn’t know what she’s talking about, but he lets her cry. He doesn’t say anything, and when he hears his mother’s voice again, she sounds completely broken. _

_ “Please, promise me you’ll never become like me when you grow up.” _

_ Baekhyun doesn’t promise anything that day. He stays still, listening to his mother softly sniffling. _

Right after his performance Baekhyun has a terribly urgent bathroom need. He quickly informs Boa, and then he urges downstairs to the closest restroom he can find, the one in the basement right under the backstage.

Once he enters, he notices someone is already inside. He freezes right on the spot.

Park Chanyeol is in front of the mirrors, with his black hair pushed back and still in his white performance attire, attempting to remove his makeup with a clear wipe.

Baekhyun stops for a second. Chanyeol only briefly glances at him, before going back to aggressively wiping off his eye-makeup.

They don’t greet each other, they don’t even acknowledge each other’s existence. Baekhyun pretends to ignore the obvious tension in the air and goes straight into one of the stalls. Once he finishes, Park Chanyeol is still there.

Baekhyun silently approaches one of the sinks. While he’s busy washing his hands, he peeks at Chanyeol again, seeing him still wiping away the makeup from his eyes like he’s angry at his own face.

“Shouldn’t you wait for someone else to do that for you?”

After Baekhyun speaks, Chanyeol instantly turns to glare at him.

“What?” He’s clearly pissed off, Baekhyun doesn’t know if it’s because he dared to address the fact that Chanyeol was basically ripping his face off with those wipes or if it’s simply because Baekhyun is talking to him. He knows Chanyeol can’t stand him - for whatever reason he still doesn’t comprehend - but that certainly won’t stop him to rub it in.

“I mean, you’ll end up ruining your skin if you keep stroking the wipes on your face like that.”

“And who ever told you that I needed to know your opinion?”

Baekhyun breathes, once, twice, until he’s sure he’s calm again. He won’t get angry at Park Chanyeol. Even if he’s always been nothing else than an asshole to him, he has to be the bigger person.

“I’m just telling you because I don’t want to get in trouble. If they find out you’ve put stuff on your face without them knowing, they might give you penalties. Where did you even find those wipes?”

Chanyeol just stares at him, looking like he’s about to punch him in the face.

“Oh, how thoughtful of you, Baekhyun. I get it, I will be careful. Now can you just fuck off?”

Baekhyun notices only now that his eyes are deeply red and swollen, like he just cried for hours straight. He feels guilty now, slightly confused, because he didn’t want to start a discussion with him. He should have just ignored him, like he does every single day. After all, Park Chanyeol is not his friend, he never was, so why should he care about him?

“Fine. Okay, I won’t tell anyone about this. But you… just don’t get caught, okay?”

Baekhyun slowly turns around and starts getting out of the restroom. The moment he gets hold of the door handle, he hears Chanyeol mutter something that sounds a lot like: “Like I’d ever need your help anyway.”

Baekhyun tightens his hold on the handle. He doesn’t know why he stopped. He breathes, he knows he has to stay calm; he  _ needs _ to-

“Why do you hate me so much?”

He says it without thinking, the words just flew on their own. But it’s a question that he wanted to ask so many times.

He never did anything to Chanyeol. Hell, he doesn’t even know if he ever had a proper conversation with him, then why is he always like this with him? Baekhyun always gets glared at when he passes near him, he always refuses to talk to him, even when they’re literally sitting next to each other in the makeup room, he never greets him when they’re both backstage and if Baekhyun even tries to speak to him, Chanyeol’s answer is always rude. They’re the same age, they’ve been living in the same place for almost five years, but unlike Jongin, Chanyeol has never let a day pass in which he doesn’t show his blatant hate for Baekhyun. He’s not expecting him to be nice, he doesn’t care if Chanyeol actually hates him - everyone does after all - he just wants to be left alone.

“Pardon?” Chanyeol says, sounding mildly confused.

“You heard me. I just asked you why you hate me so much.” Baekhyun goes back to where he was a second ago, looking more aggressive and definitely angrier. Chanyeol backs up a little bit. “You’re always rude to me, and I never,  _ ever _ did anything wrong to you! I’m just trying to live my life normally, but you always treat me like this. So why? What did I ever do to you for you to hate me this much?”

“Oh, you’re really so self-centred, you know!” Chanyeol chuckles. “You always think the world revolves around you, it really shows! Who ever said I hate you? So what, you think that because everyone’s always ready to crawl at your feet then that’s what I should do too, right? Maybe the truth is that I just don’t give a shit about you, Baekhyun, have you ever thought about that? You could just disappear from this world and I wouldn’t even notice.”

“You’re a fucking asshole, Chanyeol.”

Chanyeol shrugs, without looking at him.

“And what if I am?” he says bitterly. “Maybe you just have to accept that not everyone can be cool and perfect like you. ‘ _ Oh, look at the Starchild and his amazing honey voice, he’s the gem of this Museum, too bad that they put that ridiculous kid with the guitar before him, he’s so lame _ ’, right? _ ” _

“So that’s the problem? You’re just jealous of me?”

Chanyeol is still avoiding his gaze. He takes a long breath, before approaching the sink and washing his hands.

“No,” he mutters. “But I’m tired of constantly being considered your warm-up act.”

Baekhyun takes a deep breath. Chanyeol still doesn’t want to look at him, he keeps his eyes fixed on his own hands.

“You’ve never even seen me perform.” Baekhyun bellows, now starting to get really upset. “You always leave right after you finish! If you just-”

“And what does  _ that  _ have to do with anything I just told you?” Chanyeol suddenly screams.

“Listen,” Baekhyun says, with a tone of discomfiture in his voice “just because someone from here gave me a dumb nickname years ago, and everyone acts like I’m the Director’s cash cow, that doesn’t mean that I chose any of this.”

He hears a loud sniffle. It takes Baekhyun a few seconds to realize it came from Chanyeol. As soon as the other turns to look at him, he realizes why Chanyeol insisted so much on avoiding his gaze. His eyes are red and plump, tears slowly falling from them. Now confused, Baekhyun gapes at him.

“Okay, I get it.” Chanyeol says, in a weak and hoarse voice. “Can you just leave now?”

Baekhyun is still a little surprised, but he doesn’t waste a second more. He just turns around and leaves the restroom.

On that same night Baekhyun cannot fall asleep. He simply has too many thoughts in his mind, mainly regarding Park Chanyeol and their confrontation from before. He isn’t able to get the image of Chanyeol’s eyes glittering with tears, or the way his voice was cracking when he pronounced his last sentence.

Was he really crying because of him? No one ever cried because of Baekhyun, and this new terrifying possibility is giving him strange feelings. He’s confused, he doesn’t really know how to act. He never had any social skills to begin with, the only people he was ever close to in his entire life were his mother and Kyungsoo (Boa too, but she technically works for him so that doesn’t count). But he never had to deal with a situation like this. Should he apologise or…? Why should he, though, it’s not like he did anything to cause that. Right?

He groans, turning around to lie on his side. The door of his room is so dark it looks like an endless black hole, swallowing everything. He knows he won’t get any sleep tonight. He might as well get something to eat.

Baekhyun sits up, getting out of bed still barefoot. The kitchen is thankfully still open at his hour of the night. There won’t be too much food, but maybe he can find some leftovers from dinner. He walks through the dark hallway, trying to make as little noise as possible. The floor is cold under his feet, and if he stays still, he can hear Junmyeon’s loud snores from his room.

Baekhyun doesn’t turn any of the lights on, he quietly walks down the stairs and arrives on the ground floor of the dorm without problems. He usually gets so little sleep that his eyes have gotten completely used to the darkness.

There’s a gloomy silence down there, on the completely empty ground floor. Baekhyun quickly sneaks towards the kitchen without giving it too many thoughts. The kitchen is dark and empty, Baekhyun searches for something to grab as a midnight snack. He opens some of the cupboards, without finding anything interesting, only after a few seconds he notices a large basket right there on the kitchen counter, full of large, beautiful red apples.  _ Bingo _ .

Happy with the discovery, Baekhyun steals an apple from the basket and takes a large bite. It’s juicy and delicious, the taste so sweet on his tongue.

Right after his first bite, he hears a loud thud coming from the canteen.

He stops chewing. A glum silence is the only thing he receives, so Baekhyun just dismisses it as probably some cutlery falling on the floor and proceeds to ignore it.

But then he hears it again. This time though, it’s clearly the sound of a person’s voice.

Baekhyun tries to take a glance at the canteen entrance and notices that the lights are strangely turned on. It’s way too late for someone to be around the kitchen at this hour. Now it is clear that there is someone in the canteen right now, someone that shouldn’t be there.

He doesn’t know what he should do. Maybe it’s just someone who also couldn’t fall asleep and decided to steal some goodies from the kitchen, there’s really no need to wake up someone from the staff because of that.

But then he hears it again. It’s louder, and it’s clearly a woman’s voice.

Baekhyun shivers. There shouldn’t be women around this part of the Museum, not at this hour at least. So what the hell it’s going on right now?

He doesn’t have to find out. It would be better if he just went back to his room and forgot about any of this happening. It’s like Kyungsoo once said: everyone in this place has secrets. If it’s someone else’s secret, he shouldn’t interfere. He doesn’t want to get in trouble either.

But then again, what does he have to lose?

The apple is still in his hand, leaking juice directly on his fingers. He takes a deep breath, tightens the grip around the fruit. And then, he slowly starts walking towards the canteen.

The closer Baekhyun gets, the louder and clearer the sound becomes. There are some creaking noises, like someone brutally shaking one of the tables. Then there are heavy breathes, suddenly interrupted by a choked moan.

Baekhyun stops at the entrance of the canteen, his heart is beating like crazy. He hears another voice shushing the woman’s moans, everything is silent for a moment. Then it starts again.

Baekhyun knows there’s no turning back now. So, just after another long breath, he tries to peek inside.

Only half of the lights are turned on, but Baekhyun can still see everything clearly. There is a woman laying on one of the tables, the same where he and Kyungsoo had breakfast this very morning. She doesn’t look young, she’s probably around Boa’s age, she doesn’t look like someone from the Museum either.

Her long dark hair is all over the table, in contrast with its total whiteness. She’s fully clothed apart from her lower body, her brown skirt pulled up to her waist to expose her long, pale legs. She’s clearly having the time of her life, as she throws back her head, mouth open in silent pleasure, as Park Chanyeol brutally thrusts into her.

Baekhyun, agape, stares at the scene as if he’s in some kind of hypnosis. He follows the way Chanyeol keeps pushing her legs apart, the way he keeps biting his lower lips to suppress his moans, how his hair seems to be completely dumped with sweat. How he’s persistently keeping his eyes shut.

The woman keeps whimpering, and it gets so loud to the point where she has to put both of her hands in front of her mouth to muffle the sound. Chanyeol keeps stroking her thighs, as his thrusts get visibly harder, to the point where he can’t hold it anymore and he blurts out a soft moan. Deep, provoking, languid, beautifully lustful.

Baekhyun flinches, but he can’t stop looking. His apple slips from his hand and hits the ground with a weak thump. Baekhyun looks at it in horror.

That’s the moment when Chanyeol finally opens his eyes and notices him right away. He abruptly stops his thrusting and stares at Baekhyun with wide eyes, like a deer caught in the headlights. They look at each other for a moment, breathless, Baekhyun doesn’t have the courage to move.

“Why did you stop?” the woman moans, and that’s the moment when Baekhyun finally wakes up from his hypnosis and starts leaving.

He probably never ran this fast in his entire life. rushes towards the stairs, gets to the second floor in a matter of a few seconds. He hustles, goes inside his room as quick as he can. Baekhyun slips under his sheets, covering himself up to his hair, trying to calm himself down. His breathing is erratic, his face completely covered in sweat. It takes him a few minutes to completely calm down.

After his breathing is even again, Baekhyun covers his face with both of his hands and softly cries. The tears start flowing and he just doesn’t know how to stop them, he cannot stop these quiet sobs to fill the room. He shouldn’t have gone out, he knew he shouldn’t have looked.

He doesn’t know who that woman was, why or how she was there, he doesn’t know why Chanyeol was having sex with her. None of the staff can enter the Museum at night, not even the managers.

Other than that, the Artpieces are not allowed to do  _ that _ kind of thing with women. It was never an explicit rule, but Baekhyun figured out long ago that was the reason why the Women’s Department was completely separated from them and why they’re allowed to go out of the Museum only for a limited number of hours a week.

So now he knows a secret, a very big one too, and worst of all, it’s someone else’s secret. Even worse than that, Chanyeol saw him. He knows that Baekhyun knows. There couldn’t possibly be a worst-case scenario.

He turns around in the bed, trying a hundred different positions, but nothing seems to calm him down. He never wanted any of this. Baekhyun never wanted to get involved with other Artpieces, but somehow the universe hates him so much, to the point where he always finds himself in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Baekhyun opens his drawer, and searches for Kyungsoo’s cigarettes. He knows he shouldn’t do it, he promised Kyungsoo to never smoke without him, but it’s probably the only thing that can calm him down right now. The nicotine, the smoke, the white ashes, he watches everything go away too quickly. He throws the half-smoked cigarette outside of the window and gets back to bed.

Baekhyun manages to fall asleep after a while, the image of Chanyeol’s eyes staring at him in shock still vivid in his mind. It haunts him, like the grisly reminder that what just happened it’s real and he has no idea how to deal with the consequences of it.

__

_ Wake Up Call at 6 a.m., each Head of Department will knock at the Artpieces’ doors and give them their assigned vitamins, one hour to have breakfast in the canteen downstairs, then thirty minutes _ -

“Hey, are you alright? You look like someone who didn’t get any sleep tonight.”

Baekhyun groans, staring at his cup of coffee, as Kyungsoo takes a seat in front of him.

“Because maybe I didn’t,” he says drily, taking another sip of the coffee. It probably won’t do anything, a tiny cup like this can’t possibly give him back his seven hours of missed sleep. The makeup artists will have to do wonders to cover his eye bags today.

“I see you’re pissed.” Kyungsoo takes a slice of bread from his plate and starts munching loudly. “Is there any reason why you didn’t get any sleep?”

Baekhyun tenses as soon as he hears the question. He can’t tell Kyungsoo, not right now at least.

“Nope.” he says, in fake cheerfulness. “Just couldn’t fall asleep.”

Kyungsoo seems to buy it and doesn’t ask any further questions about Baekhyun’s lack of sleep. They keep eating their breakfast in silence, until Kyungsoo turns around to look behind his shoulders.

“Hey, I was wondering, did something happen between you and Park Chanyeol?”

Baekhyun almost chokes on his coffee, but he forces himself to stay calm.

“No, why… why would you ask that?” he quavers, hoping his uneasiness isn’t showing too much.

“I mean, he’s been glaring at you since you entered the canteen.”

Baekhyun looks up, noticing only now that Chanyeol is sitting a few tables away from them, beside Jongin and some other Artpieces from their Department. He’s not eating, he’s not talking with them, he’s not doing anything. Just staying still and glaring at Baekhyun.

Their eyes meet for a moment, Baekhyun instantly looks away, trying to ignore him.

“I don’t know, isn’t he always like this to me?” he tells Kyungsoo, hoping it’s enough to convince him.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right…”

Kyungsoo still looks puzzled for a moment, but he turns around and continues eating his breakfast like nothing’s happened.

Baekhyun eats without saying much, while Kyungsoo tells him something he doesn’t listen to. He peeks a couple of times behind Kyungsoo, noticing that Chanyeol is still glaring at him. Baekhyun tries not to look, but he feels so uncomfortable that he can’t wait to leave.

Kyungsoo keeps talking, ignoring the fact that Baekhyun isn’t paying attention at all. His best friend’s flow of words gets suddenly interrupted when they hear a voice from their right.

“Hello, Baekhyun, can I sit here?”

Both Baekhyun and Kyungsoo turn around to see a tall man dressed in blue, with platinum blond hair standing in front of them, smiling exclusively at Baekhyun.

Park Jungsoo, another Head of Department.

Just like Junmyeon is Head of the Department of male Artpieces from eighteen to twenty-five, Jungsoo takes responsibilities over male Artpieces over that age. With Jungsoo being thirty-two himself, he’s probably the Artpiece who has been here the longest. There is something in the way he smiles that makes him look charming, and yet impish at the same time. Jungsoo stares at Kyungsoo for a long time, without saying anything. What that look means, however, is very clear.

“Right, I think I’m gonna go have a shower,” Kyungsoo says, after standing up, understanding how Jungsoo doesn’t want him to be there.

Baekhyun quietly groans, while he watches Kyungsoo running away. He doesn’t want to be left alone with Jungsoo, that man scares him, especially because he’s really close with the Director.

“Oh, Baekhyun, Baekhyun!” Jungsoo takes the chair in front of him and drags it away from the table with a loud screech, then he proceeds to sit on it. “It’s been a long time since the last time we talked, right?”

Baekhyun doesn’t know what’s going on. Park Jungsoo never talks to him, they are in two different Departments, so they rarely see each other. He doesn’t get where all this kindness is coming from.

“Yeah, I guess so…” Baekhyun shrugs.

“I saw your performance last night. Really impressive.” Jungsoo says, smiling at him. A smile so confident is making Baekhyun slightly uncomfortable. “I told you many times already, but your voice is really something else.”

Baekhyun looks around them. The canteen is still pretty full, with everyone talking and shouting over each other. Which means that if Jungsoo is about to tell him something important, likely nobody will pay attention to them. Maybe that’s what he came here to do.

“Listen, do you…” Baekhyun stammers, trying to venture a guess. “Do you need something from me?”

Jungsoo grins again.

“Depends if you’re willing to give it to me.”

Baekhyun stares at him in confusion, still not understanding what he’s trying to say.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I understand…?”

Jungsoo sighs, before leaning on the table closer to Baekhyun’s face, so he can lower his voice when he talks again.

“You know, Baekhyun, you and I are very similar, we are different from the rest of them.” Jungsoo takes the last piece of bread from Baekhyun’s plate and shoves it directly in his mouth. Baekhyun doesn’t even protest. “We’re not like them, all of this rabble around us. These new kids, who think that the only thing they need to be an Artpiece is a cute face… doesn’t get you mad? We’re not like them, we’re special,  _ you’re _ special. That’s why I decided to trust you.”

“Trust me with what?”

Jungsoo leans closer to him, his voice now barely a whisper.

“You know, there are too many people inside here that are aware of secrets, Baekhyun. Secrets that could possibly harm the Museum and its reputation.” Jungsoo tells him, looking at him in the eyes. “Secrets that someone might be too afraid to report. And that’s why I thought, maybe you can help me. Maybe you could give me something I want and, if you do your job well, I can give you something in return...”

Baekhyun doesn’t flinch. He understands now. He wants him to be a spy, that’s what’s going on. He breathes, staying in silence for a moment, thinking about the offer. Maybe this is the right chance, he could get rid of Chanyeol’s secret and never think about it again. That’s not his problem after all. And maybe this is also the chance to get what he wants, without any repercussions whatsoever.

“And what do I get in return?” Baekhyun asks, trying to test the waters.

Jungsoo’s eyes brightens and a large grin appears on his lips as Baekhyun now shows that he might be interested in his offer.

“Oh, you know me and the Director are good buddies, right?” he says and Baekhyun listens attentively. “Maybe a couple of free hours a week, or more than one completely free day where you’re allowed to get out…”

“I’m not interested in that.” Baekhyun cuts him right away. “You’ll have to do more than this to convince me, otherwise I’m not in.”

“… _ or _ I could give you access to some information regarding let’s say, a certain person that you might be looking for…”

Baekhyun stops right there. His attention has been grasped and Jungsoo knows it very well, as he keeps talking about the offer like he’s about to win the lottery: “Current location, contact info, anything there is to know about what they’re doing and where to find them at the moment. What do you say now?”

Baekhyun closes his hands in fists, clenching so hard that his nails start to sink in his skin. He is in front of a hard choice, and he doesn’t know if he’s willing to trade someone else’s safety in exchange. It’s not right, and it shouldn’t be his choice to make. But after all, why should he care? If Park Chanyeol has a girlfriend that’s his problem, not Baekhyun’s.

“And what do I have to do, exactly?” he asks.

Jungsoo takes Baekhyun’s nape so he can force him to lean closer. Now face to face, that irritating grin finally disappears.

“Just tell me anything suspicious, anything odd that’s happening with the other Artpieces,” Jungsoo explains, now sounding utterly serious. “Spy on them if that’s necessary, and if you find something, don’t talk to your Head of Department or anyone about it, just report everything to me, and I guarantee you, you’ll get that info as soon as you bring me something juicy.”

Baekhyun gulps. He might already have something juicy, he just doesn’t know what he should really do with it.

“I’ll think about it,” it’s all he can say in the end.

Jungsoo finally lets him go, leaning back on his chair. He returns to his usual fake smile, talking spontaneously like nothing just happened.

“Let me know if you’re interested before tomorrow evening,” Jungsoo says, standing up from the chair. “And  _ don’t _ tell anyone about this.”

Baekhyun stays silent, watching him walk away, taking his time to catch his breath.

“Oh and Baekhyun?” Jungsoo suddenly turns around to face him. “Last night that song felt a little flat. Maybe consider practicing a little more.”

Jungsoo leaves after that.

Baekhyun’s clenching his fists so hard he’s sure he’s about to bleed. His mind is a chaotic mixture of thoughts, and certainly it doesn’t help that Chanyeol is still sitting at that table, still glaring at him. He can’t take it anymore, he wants to leave right now.

When he abruptly stands up from the chair though, he notices Chanyeol does the same. Baekhyun tries to ignore it, but he knows he’s being followed. Even when he exits the canteen and starts walking towards the stairs, he knows Chanyeol is still after him.

Baekhyun peeks behind his shoulder a couple of times. Chanyeol is stalking him, just a few meters behind. He tries not to think about it, the sight making him feel anxious. He cannot ignore it for long though, as Chanyeol fastens his pace to reach Baekhyun, grabbing his arm in an attempt to stop him.

“Hey, can I talk to you?”

Baekhyun doesn’t stop, he keeps walking like everything is normal, with Chanyeol following every one of his steps. Even when he tries to speed up a little, Chanyeol does the same thing.

“Why?” he tries to play dumb, hoping his nervousness isn’t showing too much.

“Baekhyun, this isn’t the time to be offended,” Chanyeol whispers to him. There are still too many people around that could hear them. “Just…  _ please _ , can we talk?”

Baekhyun finally stops, looking around for a moment. The hallway outside the canteen isn’t a good place to talk. There are way too many people around.

“Okay” he agrees. He knows he can’t avoid this conversation forever. “Let’s go somewhere more private, though.”

Baekhyun starts walking, trying to stay calm, while Chanyeol follows behind without saying anything. Nobody seems to notice them, which is a good sign.

They go downstairs, Baekhyun knows they won’t probably find anybody there at this hour of the day. Once in the basement, Baekhyun goes directly into the restroom, the same one where they had their confrontation, which Baekhyun recalls, happened only yesterday, though it truly feels like weeks have passed.

After Baekhyun enters, Chanyeol locks the restroom door behind him. They both stick their backs to each one of the opposite walls, a large distance separating them. Down there it’s so cold and the situation is making Baekhyun so uncomfortable he’s getting chills everywhere. Chanyeol doesn’t seem to be very relaxed either. He keeps playing with his own fingers and it takes a few seconds before any of them starts talking.

“Look, about what you saw last night…” Chanyeol starts awkwardly, trying to keep his fingers still. “I… It’s not what you- “

“I haven’t told anybody, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

After Baekhyun says that, Chanyeol seems to relax a little.

“Thank you” he exhales, falling back against the restroom wall. “I know we aren’t exactly friends, but… It’s really important for me that nobody will ever know about this, okay?”

“I won’t tell anyone. I promise,” Baekhyun declares, feeling his heart beating a little faster. He ignores the fact that he was about to spill everything to Park Jungsoo just a few minutes ago. “But I would really appreciate it if you gave me some explanation about what happened.”

Chanyeol gulps, visibly shivering. Baekhyun doesn’t know if it’s because of the cold or because he is being confronted with that particular request.

“It’s… complicated.”

“Chanyeol, who was that woman?” Baekhyun insists. He won’t let him go outside of this restroom until he’s explained everything about what exactly happened last night. “What’s her name, how long have you been seeing her?”

“I don’t know,” Chanyeol whispers, which isn’t enough to convince Baekhyun.

“Chanyeol-”

“I don’t know, okay?” Chanyeol suddenly shouts, looking at him with despair in his eyes. Baekhyun stops talking, not feeling so confident anymore. “I don’t know her name or who she is, I had never seen her prior to yesterday!”

Baekhyun is lost. He doesn’t understand what Chanyeol is trying to say. He takes a step back, but his shoulders are already hitting the wall.

“What?”

“It’s just…” Chanyeol takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. “I have a deal, okay? With the Director. He’s the only one that knows about this. He… he promised me some stuff, and in exchange I have to sleep with those women. I think they pay him some large amount of money to have me for a number of nights or something, but I’m really not allowed to know anything about them. I have some scheduled appointments from time to time, but I don’t-”

Baekhyun is trying  _ so _ hard to stay quiet right now. He doesn’t know how to elaborate all of the information Chanyeol just revealed to him and stay calm at the same time.

“Look, I know it sounds weird, but- “

“ _ Weird _ ? You’re basically prostituting yourself, and for what?” Baekhyun knows that he’s screaming right now, but he doesn’t really know exactly why he’s so angry. Maybe it’s because Chanyeol’s explanation is giving him another reason to hate this damn place. “What could he possibly have promised you that’s so important you’re willing to sell yourself for that?”

“Because I didn’t know what else to do, okay?!” Chanyeol snaps. Then he covers his face with both of his hands and Baekhyun doesn’t know how to proceed. He stays still, watching Chanyeol slowly slumping on the ground and sitting on the floor. “I didn’t have any other choice. Fuck, I’m such a loser ...”

Baekhyun has never felt as uncomfortable as he is right now, but he still tries to come closer to him, hoping he’s not making the situation worse.

“S-should I call someone, or…?”

He literally has no idea how to act and Chanyeol is still not answering him. Maybe it’s better if he leaves, but as soon as he approaches the door, Chanyeol stops him:

“No! Just-” he’s still sitting on the ground, covering his face. Baekhyun can hear the echo of his heavy breaths. “Stay here for a second.  _ Please _ .”

“Okay…”

Baekhyun has no other choice than to do the same thing as him, so he sits on the restroom floor, a few meters away from Chanyeol. Silence fills the room, since none of them dare to speak. Baekhyun doesn’t try to talk to him, he doesn’t touch him, he just does what he was asked to do, so he waits for Chanyeol to calm down, sitting silently in the corner, hugging his legs in an attempt to fight the chilling cold of the basement.

After a while he’s strangely getting used to it. He waits till he hears Chanyeol’s breath getting even again. The other Artpiece finally shows him his face. Baekhyun notices his eyes are glittering with tears.

“Chanyeol,” he tries to call him, hoping this is the right time to finally speak again. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” Chanyeol whispers, right before a loud sniff. “I’m so sorry, I don’t why I’m crying… God, this is so embarrassing.”

“Look, I’m sorry I yelled at you,” Baekhyun sincerely apologizes. He hugs his legs closer, feeling colder and colder every second he spends in here. “It was unnecessary.”

Another sniffle, he watches Chanyeol aggressively wiping his tears away from his eyes.

“No, don’t apologize.” Chanyeol says between sighs. “I kinda overacted too.”

A few agonizing seconds of silence pass. Baekhyun doesn’t know how much time they have spent inside the restroom, it’s probably been just a few minutes, but it truly feels like years have passed.

“Is it true?” Baekhyun suddenly asks, in a shaky voice. “The things you told me? About the deal with the Director?”

Chanyeol simply nods, his puffy eyes fixed on the floor. Baekhyun shivers a little.

“How long has this been going on?”

“I don’t know. Four, five months? I think I had sex with about four women, or so.” he replies, voice barely audible.

Baekhyun nods, even though he’s aware that Chanyeol isn’t looking at him right now.

“Can you tell me what the Director promised you?”

Chanyeol simply shakes his head, still staring at the ground.

“I can’t. Sorry.”

Baekhyun is about to ask something else but, unexpectedly, Chanyeol speaks over him:

“I don’t know if you ever had this feeling but… I’ve been an Artpiece for five years. I was eighteen when I auditioned, I was young and had this stupid dream in mind: all I wanted was for people to look at me and think ‘oh wow, he’s amazing, wish I could be as cool as him’. I wanted to be admired, I wanted to be looked at. I was happy at first, but I realised it doesn’t give me joy anymore. And now I’m stuck, doing the same routine over and over, like a fucking animal attraction.”

Baekhyun understands perfectly well what he means. It was nice at first, singing on the stage, having people coo at him, taking pictures of him, the art students drawing him with attention to every detail. It was thrilling, it gave him satisfaction. But on the long terms, he realised how shallow all of it was. This life doesn’t really give him anything, it doesn’t give him happiness, nor fulfilment anymore. And he has had way more than just five years to think about that.

“I’m really sorry about the way I behaved with you. I want you to know that,” Chanyeol says at one point. The apology genuinely surprises Baekhyun for a second, but a hint of a smile appears on his face, without him realising it.

“It’s okay.”

“I don’t hate you, I never have.” Finally, he looks up and Baekhyun meets his eyes. “Maybe you were right, I really was jealous, because of how carefree you look.”

_ Carefree _ ?

Now, Baekhyun wouldn’t exactly describe himself as carefree. If anything he’s jaded, bored, but it’s not like he ever got any choice in the first place. He used to dream about all the things he could have done if he was free, but in reality, he’s terrified of most of them. That’s why he keeps lying to Kyungsoo, making promises with him that will probably never come true, because the truth is, he doesn’t really know anything about the world outside of the Museum. So, in a way, even if he was free, he would still be stuck.

“I’m not carefree,” Baekhyun murmurs, awkwardly playing with the hem of his shirt. “I’m just… really exhausted.”

He has spent too much time in this place. It’s been so long he doesn’t even remember how a normal life is supposed to be. He’s so tired of not having enough time for himself, of pretending to be something he’s not, so tired of having to go through the same routine over and over, just to please some strangers that only care about his pretty face.

“I hate this place so much...” Chanyeol confesses, in a soft breath.

Baekhyun smiles. He understands perfectly.

“We’re really similar, you know?” Baekhyun whispers back. He hugs his legs impossibly closer. He feels so tiny right now.

“Well, that’s a nice thing to hear,” Chanyeol tells him and or a second Baekhyun swears he sees him smiling. “I mean, you’re kinda cool.”

Baekhyun can’t help but laugh, Chanyeol joining him only moments later. It feels so surreal, being here, hiding in one of the Museum’s public restrooms, laughing with Park Chanyeol over their terrible existences.

There’s really nothing that funny, but they don’t stop laughing for a while, and for a moment it really feels like nothing else outside of those four walls exists. Right now there’s only Byun Baekhyun and Park Chanyeol, two Artpieces of the People’s Star Museum of Seoul, giggling together, sitting on a dirty restroom floor.

After their conversation, Chanyeol stops being rude to him. They don’t act like they’re suddenly friends though, they still don’t talk to each other. Overall, it’s like nothing has happened between them. But now they do share a secret and Baekhyun is not going to betray that little trust he’s gained.

So the first thing he does the next morning is going straight to Jungsoo and tells him that he can’t accept his offer. It just wouldn’t be right. Jungsoo replies with a simple “I understand” and it ends just like that.

The sleepless nights still don’t end though. Baekhyun still finds trouble getting asleep, to the point where the makeup artists have to spend hours just on covering his eye bags every morning. They even ask Boa what they should do, and in the end, they discuss it with Doctor Zhang and decide to prescribe him some heavy sleeping pills that Baekhyun has no intention to actually take. They are giving him way too many pills for his own taste.

One morning he decides to sit at Chanyeol’s table at breakfast. He doesn’t know what’s gotten to him all of a sudden. He walks there, to the table where he is eating with Kim Jongin and asks them “Can I sit here?”

Kyungsoo is beside him all the time, staring at him like he’s gone insane, but in the end he also agrees to sit with them, and they end up having a pleasant conversation. After that one time, Kyungsoo asks him every morning to sit with Chanyeol and Jongin and Baekhyun doesn’t complain. They actually make a good team, after all.

They work all day long, but night after night, Baekhyun gets little or no sleep at all. He still gets to smoke a couple of times with Kyungsoo, they laugh together but that doesn’t help him getting asleep either.

His nights feel infinite, the only thing he’s doing is lying in bed, staring at the grey ceiling. Until something happens one night.

Baekhyun’s watch strikes exactly 2.34 a.m, when he hears some steps coming from the hallway. They’re not very hard to notice: the dorm is completely silent at this hour, and the door of his room isn’t thick enough to muffle every sound.

He slowly gets up from his bed and opens the door, being very careful to do it in the quietest way possible. Baekhyun is met with the dark hallway and a lonely figure, walking his way through the stairs. It’s not too hard to recognize him, there’s hardly any other Artpiece in this Department that’s as tall as him.

“What are you doing?” he whispers, quietly sneaking out of his room, his bare feet touching the cold floor. Chanyeol winces and instantly turns around.

“ _ What the hell _ ?” he whispers back, being visibly surprised. Baekhyun doesn’t talk again until he’s closer to him. Only when Chanyeol recognizes him, he seems to relax.

“Oh, it’s just you,” Chanyeol exhales. “Fuck, you really scared me, I thought it was Junmyeon or someone else…”

“Where were you going?” Baekhyun asks, though he thinks he knows the answer already. Even Chanyeol seems to realize it. He peers at Baekhyun, slowly stepping back.

“You know exactly where I’m going.” he breathes, already walking away. “I have an appointment. In the canteen…”

Everything happens quickly. Baekhyun’s body is moving on his own, when his hand catches Chanyeol’s wrist before he starts leaving again.

“Please don’t go,” he pleads, tightening the grip. “This time don’t go.”

“Baekhyun. Let go of my arm.”

“Listen we can find a way to resolve this, okay? You don’t have to be alone in this,” Baekhyun is quick to tell him, even though he has absolutely no idea how. Getting out of any situation that involves the Director seems impossible, but they have to at least try. “Maybe I can ask Boa for help, or somebody else, I don’t know. I don’t know what he told you to convince you, but you have to understand that what the Director’s doing with you right now is illegal.”

He can’t see Chanyeol’s face right now, but he can still hear his quiet breaths.

“Don’t.” A soft murmur, that makes Baekhyun heart break.

“...Why not?”

“Because I’m afraid that if I don’t do as he told me then he won’t ever leave me alone.”

Baekhyun doesn’t know how to reply to that. But he understands, so he simply lets go of Chanyeol’s wrist and looks at him walking away, without saying anything. He stands in the middle of the hallway and watches over Chanyeol until he’s at the stairs.

No. He’s not going to give up this easily this time. He’s not entirely powerless after all, Baekhyun still hasn’t run out of tricks to use. He knows this place very well, he knows all of its strengths and all of its weaknesses.

And the greatest weakness of all is he himself. Baekhyun knows that they’ll stop everything, they will even close down the Museum, if anything bad ever happens to their precious Starchild. He is way too valuable for the Museum, and Baekhyun can’t waste the perfect chance to use this weakness against them.

He walks fast, reaches the stairs at the end of the hallway, where Chanyeol has already walked half of the steps.

“Wait!”

Chanyeol abruptly stops mid stairs, turning around to look at him.

“I’m gonna scream,” Baekhyun swears. He didn’t want it to sound like a threat, but it sure looks like one. “If you go downstairs right now, I swear I’m gonna scream and wake up the whole dorm.”

Chanyeol doesn’t talk, he just stares at Baekhyun with a blank expression.

“Okay then.” Chanyeol says.

He obviously doesn’t believe him, and Baekhyun feels so defeated when a few seconds later Chanyeol starts walking down again.

Everything is calm just for a brief second. The only thing Baekhyun knows is that he is still watching Chanyeol going downstairs, taking a few deep breaths.

He somehow finds the courage to do it, and screams with everything he has. A sudden and infinite ear-piercing screech, that makes his throat hurt and his eyes tear up. But at least Chanyeol suddenly runs back to him.

“Are you insane?” Chanyeol yells at him, furiously grabbing his shoulders. Baekhyun doesn’t care, he’s just happy Chanyeol didn’t go downstairs.

It's immediately chaotic, with all of the doors of the rooms in the hallway opening one by one and every Artpiece rushing out asking who was the one screaming. He feels someone gripping his shoulder and even though it’s dark, he recognizes Junmyeon’s fiery hair.

“What just happened? Are you okay?” the Head of Department practically shouts in his face. Someone turns the lights of the hallway on and now Baekhyun can clearly see the enormous fuss he just created. He sees all of the Artpieces standing around him, still in their pajamas half-sleeping, rubbing their eyes.

“It’s nothing, I was just… going downstairs to the canteen because I was a little hungry,” Baekhyun lies, with everyone’s eyes fixed on him. “Then I slipped on the stairs and hurt my ankle, it’s really nothing to worry about too much.”

“Chanyeol, why were you here?” Junmyeon asks the boy, who is just standing there in front of everyone, too shocked to speak.

“I…” he mumbles, everyone is now staring at him. “I just…”

“He heard me scream and he instantly came out of his room to help,” Baekhyun tries to make up the most plausible excuse. He stares directly into Chanyeol’s eyes, hoping he’ll play along with the lies. “He was the first one to get out, that’s why he was already here...”

“Is it true?” Junmyeon asks him.

“Uh, yeah,” Chanyeol throws a glance at Baekhyun before turning back to Junmyeon. “I wasn’t sleeping so I heard him right away.”

“Are you really okay?” Baekhyun sees Kyungsoo suddenly appearing next to him, looking slightly worried. “Junmyeon, maybe we should call Yixing?”

Everyone tries to make suggestions, talking all over each other. Junmyeon closes his eyes, sighing loudly.

“Listen, everyone go back to sleep now,” Junmyeon orders and after a few groans and protests, the Artpieces start moving away from them. “I’ll resolve this by myself, everyone else, now, please go!”

Kyungsoo offers himself to take Baekhyun to the infirmary, but Junmyeon refuses and tells him he’ll do it by himself. Everyone does as Junmyeon said, they leave until the only people left in the hallway are Baekhyun, Junmyeon and Chanyeol, who is, for some reason, still standing there and gaping at them.

“Chanyeol, didn’t you hear what I just said?” Junmyeon tells him, while he puts one of Baekhyun’s arms around his shoulders. “You too, go back to your room, now!”

“But… I can still help Baekhyun if-“

“No!” Junmyeon shouts, maybe a little too aggressively. He must feel so tired, Baekhyun just knows he is. He kind of feels bad for him. “I’m the Head of this Department, I’ll resolve this by myself. Now go, please!”

Baekhyun knows he is a selfish person. He must be, he’s so selfish that, even while he’s leaving with Junmyeon, he glances over his shoulder to take one last look at Chanyeol.

Chanyeol luckily looks back at him, mouthing a silent “ _ thank you _ ” with his lips.

Baekhyun didn’t think about the possibility that his night could end like this, staring at the blinding light above his head while lying on an examination table, in the middle of the night, with Junmyeon sitting at his side, impatiently tapping his foot.

“Well, Baekhyun, looks like everything is okay with your ankle.” Doctor Zhang suddenly walks in, with the results of Baekhyun’s radiography in his hands. “Nothing is broken, it’s probably just a little distortion. You’re going to be fine with just some rest.”

Zhang Yixing is still young, but indeed an excellent doctor. He has been working here for about five years, and Baekhyun likes him a lot. He is easy to talk to and, having worked in different People’s Museums for all of his life, he was never afraid to make fun of the absurdity of these places. He’s also the only person working here that treats all of the Artpieces in the exact same way. Baekhyun likes how witty he is, how he’s never afraid to speak up.

“See? I told you I’m okay,” Baekhyun whispers to Junmyeon, who still doesn’t look convinced. Baekhyun feels a little bad for waking up all of these people in the middle of the night, just for a few made up lies. But at least the infirmary is very close to the canteen. This means Chanyeol is safe for now.

“Are you sure about this?” Junmyeon asks Yixing, a little aggressively. “Are you sure everything is okay with Baekhyun? Because if it’s not, then we are all getting into serious trouble.”

“Yes, I had figured it out by the fact that I received a call in the middle of the night and was forced to come here at 3 a.m. just because of an hurt ankle,” Yixing replies, looking at Junmyeon like he’s scolding him. However, when he turns to look at Baekhyun his expression shifts into a benevolent one. “Baekhyun, how are you feeling?”

“Perfectly fine,” Baekhyun scoffs. “I just want to go back to bed.”

“See, Junmyeon, there’s nothing to worry about.” Yixing gently pats Junmyeon’s back, receiving a death glare in response. “I know what I’m doing, and I assure you Baekhyun’s ankle is okay. Let’s stop getting worried over the smallest things, right-“

“What the hell happened?!”

The door to Yixing’s office abruptly opens, and a very angry looking Boa walks in. She is still wearing her winter coat and she looks breathless, like she’s been running for hours. She looks at both Junmyeon and Yixing like she wants to murder them.

“I was woken up in the middle of the night, had to calm down my five year old crying daughter, had to assure my husband that no one had died, before rushing here. I just had a terrible night, so now be kind to me explain what the  _ fuck _ happened tonight with Baekhyun?!”

“It’s really nothing,” Yixing tries to say, before he’s eventually interrupted by Boa:

“It’s not  _ nothing _ , Doctor!” Boa yells at him. “Do you know how much it would cost us if Baekhyun can’t perform for a while? He is not disposable or replaceable, like any other Artpiece. He  _ needs _ to be perfectly healthy!”

Baekhyun sighs, while Boa and Yixing keep on arguing. Even if Boa is always nice to him, he knows that all of the devotion never came from genuine love. She’s like everyone else in the Museum, she doesn’t care about him, she only cares about the product, the Starchild, about the money he represents. Baekhyun has always known it, and yet, why does it always hurt so much whenever he is reminded of it?

“So he slipped while he was trying to go downstairs,” Boa repeats everything that Yixing just told her. “And Junmyeon, where were you while all of this was happening?”

It’s the first time she addresses Junmyeon. The Head of Department, still sitting beside Baekhyun, looks up and instantly gulps.

“What do you mean? I was sleeping of course.”

“The responsibility of the Artpieces in your Department is yours! Did you suddenly forget that?” Boa shouts furiously at him. “You’re the Head of Department, if anything,  _ anything _ happens to Baekhyun after the Museum closes then the responsibly is yours!”

“Well, what did you want me to do? It’s not like I can control him even when he’s supposed to be sleeping!” Junmyeon shouts back.

Baekhyun clenches his teeth. They’re fighting over nothing again. He is too tired for stuff like this.

“Did you not hear what I just said to you?! If anything happens then you should be the one getting penalties!”

“Why? How could this  _ ever _ be my fault?”

“Can you two just  _ shut up _ ?” Baekhyun suddenly shouts over them. Boa and Junmyeon instantly stop talking and turn to look at him, completely caught off guard.

“I told you I’m fine, even Yixing told you I’m fine, there’s absolutely no reason to fight over this!”

The room has fallen into silence. Baekhyun takes a deep breath before starting again.

“Look, I’m sorry I got into trouble and I had to wake you all up,” he says, staring at the three people in front of him. “but it’s not Junmyeon’s fault if I hurt myself tonight. It’s  _ mine _ , it’s my fault and no one else’s. Let’s stop making up excuses. So Boa, if you need to give penalties to someone then give them to me, okay?”

In the end, Boa agrees on giving him five penalties for what happened tonight. It’s not like Baekhyun cares about them anyway.

They still force him to spend the night at the infirmary so he won’t have to walk upstairs for tonight. Baekhyun still finds it a useless thing to do, since there are no nurses working here during the night, but he eventually agrees. Boa and Yixing go back home, while Junmyeon is the only one that has to stay in. After Junmyeon has accompanied him into the infirmary, and made sure he is safe under the bed covers. He is about to leave, when Baekhyun turns back to him.

“I’m sorry I got you into trouble tonight,” he murmurs, looking at Junmyeon’s back.

Junmyeon stops for a moment, proving that he’s listening. However, he doesn’t say anything back. He just turns the lights off and leaves Baekhyun alone in the empty, dark infirmary.

Miraculously, Baekhyun manages to fall asleep for a few minutes, before he’s eventually woken up by the sound of someone walking into the infirmary and shuffling closer to his bed.

“What?” he whispers, still half asleep.

“Sorry to wake you, it’s me.” He sees a figure getting closer, but only when after he’s gotten more used to the dark he can recognize it. It’s Chanyeol.

Baekhyun stirs up, sitting on the infirmary bed, while Chanyeol sits at the edge of it. He admits he’s a little pissed off about the fact that Chanyeol has just destroyed the only little amount of sleep he could have gotten tonight, but he’s also kinda glad he came here. Especially when Chanyeol has his hands full of food he has probably just stolen from the kitchen.

“What are you doing here?” Baekhyun peeks at his watch. It’s 4 a.m.

“Junmyeon told me you were staying at the infirmary, so I thought to visit you, if that’s okay. I brought you some snacks from the kitchen!” Chanyeol smiles proudly, then gently drops all of the food on the bed. There are two lemon flavoured yogurts, one can of dry roasted peanuts and a bunch of green apples. “Because well, I wanted to thank you.”

Baekhyun is so overwhelmed he doesn’t even know what to say. Instead, he simply takes one of the lemon yogurt cups and starts opening it.

“You didn’t have to,” he whispers softly, pretending to be too busy sinking the spoon into the yogurt to avoid looking into Chanyeol in the eyes.

After he takes the first spoon of the yogurt, Chanyeol follows him, taking the other cup. They stay in silence eating for a moment, making slight comments about how good the yogurt is.

“Why did you do that before?” Chanyeol asks him at some point, before shovelling a whole spoon full of yogurt inside his mouth. Baekhyun does the same and eats another spoonful before replying.

“I don’t know,” he says, looking down at his plastic spoon buried under white yogurt. “Probably because I could tell you didn’t want to go.”

Chanyeol peers at him for a second, with an inscrutable expression.

“You’re right. I didn’t,” he confesses, half-smiling.

“What happened to her, by the way?” Baekhyun asks. “You know… the woman you were supposed to see.”

“I don’t know.” Chanyeol stops to take a spoonful of his yogurt. Baekhyun notices he’s getting worked up and eating faster than before. “The Director gave me special permissions on my watch, so I was supposed to let her in, but I didn’t show up of course. Fuck, he’s going to be furious with me tomorrow.”

“Hey.” Baekhyun suddenly takes his wrist, stopping him from practically choking himself with the yogurt. “I was the one to make all of this up, and I guarantee you he’s never gonna know about this, okay? And if he’s gonna blame anyone, that’s s me. You’re safe for now, you have to trust me on this, okay?”

He knows he isn’t at risk just like any other Artpiece is when it comes to penalties. Even if Baekhyun gets himself into serious trouble, they will never punish him severely, like they would do with any other Artpiece. Being considered special after all has its bright sides.

“I heard your manager came here.” Chanyeol murmurs, voice faltering a little. “Did you… did you get into trouble?”

“I did manage to get myself some penalties,” Baekhyun chuckles, finally releasing his grip on Chanyeol’s wrist.

“ _ What _ ?” Chanyeol puts a hand on his mouth after realizing he just screamed out loud. Thankfully, nobody seems to have heard him. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry!”

“Don’t be,” Baekhyun keeps eating his yogurt, digging till nothing is left in the cup. “I don’t care about that stuff anyway.”

He knows that’s an odd thing to say. Penalties should be a bad thing for every Artpiece. They get them any time they misbehave or break the rules, and once they reach the number of twenty penalties, they aren’t allowed to go out of the Museum for a week. It’s another reminder that the Museum owns them and they’re not allowed to do as they want. And Baekhyun knows very well what that does to people: he has seen a fair amount of people going crazy when they’re being locked up. They cry, they lose their appetite, they don’t want to leave their bed anymore. But this isn’t something he can relate to. Baekhyun has never reached the twenty penalties point, not once in his life. But it still never changed anything: he rarely gets outside anyway.

There’s a pause, a sad silence between them. Baekhyun keeps eating, pretending he doesn’t feel Chanyeol’s astonished eyes staring at him.

“What do you mean?” he asks, sounding confused.

Baekhyun takes a few seconds before finding the right word to describe it.

“I mean I don’t really go out during free hours. I don’t know the city very well so I just… you know, stay in my room.”

That’s some way to describe it. He doesn’t talk about the feeling of discouragement whenever he thinks about how gigantic the world he doesn’t know is. The Museum is his world, it’s the only one he’s ever known. He knows how to move in it and he knows how to act, and even though he’s probably read more books than any other human being on this planet, there are still too many things he doesn’t know. He doesn’t tell Chanyeol that the prime reason why he doesn’t leave the Museum is that he’s terrified of the outside.

“Are you serious?” Chanyeol frowns, still not convinced. “Wait, when was the last time you left the Museum?”

Baekhyun sighs. Maybe he shouldn’t trust Chanyeol this much, but there is a tiny voice screaming in his head, and it’s saying  _ he understands _ ,  _ tell him, tell him everything _ .

“I don’t know... like five months ago?”

When Chanyeol’s eyes open wide, Baekhyun realizes this wasn’t a good idea at all.

“Five months without leaving this place and you haven’t gone crazy yet?” Chanyeol exclaims, completely baffled.

“I told you! I like my room, it’s comfortable and I have everything I need in here,” Baekhyun quickly explains. He doesn’t know why he ever thought someone like Chanyeol would understand him. This was just a terrible, horrible idea. “Out there it’s just so big, and full of people and I don’t know Seoul at all, I would just get lost. Big cities aren’t really my thing.”

Chanyeol stares at him in silence, a little shaken by the reaction.

“I’m sorry, but I’m not trying to make fun of you, you know?” Chanyeol says. “ Look, I get it. What I was trying to say is that… well, since we’re stuck here, you might as well go out and see places.”

“I don’t know…”

Baekhyun looks down at his empty yogurt cup. He stares and gets lost in it. He doesn’t look up until Chanyeol makes a suggestion.

“Maybe I can take you out,” Chanyeol suddenly blurts out. Baekhyun has to restrain himself from laughing in his face. “No really, I’m serious! I know the city, we can go out together and I can show you around, since you’re scared of getting lost!”

This man is crazy, Baekhyun is certain. Why would anyone want to go out with him? He’s so lame and boring, it’s just that Chanyeol hasn’t realized it already.

Baekhyun brings his legs closer to his chest, hugging them tightly.

“I don’t know- I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Okay, listen: tell me  _ one _ thing,” Chanyeol continues, totally excited about the suggestion, “just one thing that you’ve always wanted to try in Seoul but you never did. I mean, there must be something!”

Baekhyun doesn’t have to think about it too much. He looks at Chanyeol for a moment, smirking.

“You know, there is one thing, actually…”

“What is it?”

Baekhyun leans closer like he’s trying to confess a secret. Chanyeol also leans closer to him, without breaking their eye contact.

“I’ve never eaten chicken feet,” he whispers in one breath.

Chanyeol immediately pulls away with a disgusted face, which instantly causes Baekhyun to burst into chuckles.

“ _ That’s _ what you want to try?”

“What? You told me to say one thing!” he laughs, trying to cover his face with his hands. “I’m sorry, I know it’s stupid...”

“No, it’s good! It’s-” Chanyeol tells him, still laughing a bit, and that gives Baekhyun the courage to finally look at him in the eyes. “Listen, let’s go out this Friday night. I know it’s abrupt, but I promise you we’ll have chicken feet and all sorts of goodies. One night where we don’t think about the Museum, or the Director, or work, or performance night. I’ll lead the way and I’ll pay for everything. Just consider it a thank you gift for tonight.”

Baekhyun smiles at him. He is a little excited about this, he has to admit. Even though he and Chanyeol didn’t speak much in the past five years, and they never were friends to begin with, Baekhyun still wants to trust him.

“Okay,” he says. Maybe it’s the worst decision ever, maybe it’s not. “Let’s get some chicken feet.”

Chanyeol beams back at him, now satisfied, and goes back to his yogurt.

“I have to warn you, though,” he says, taking another spoonful. “Those things look really gross.”

_ “Are you awake, sunshine?” _

_ His mother has the most beautiful voice, so soothing it has the power to calm him right away. _

_ Baekhyun is ten, lying in bed with his back facing her. He can’t get asleep, even though it’s been hours since they’ve gone to bed. _

_ “Sweetheart, please talk to me.” _

_ “Are you happy here, mum?” _

_ He feels the hug, her arms spooning him from behind. He’s not a child anymore, but he always feels so little in his mother’s arms. _

_ “I am happy when I’m with you, my sunshine.” _

_ Baekhyun can’t see her face, but he believes her. He always believes her. Though he never says it back, he never says I love you to his mother. _

_ “Do you want me to sing for you?” she asks in the sweetest voice. _

_ “Okay.” _

_ She knows an old song in English, it’s from an American singer called Bing Crosby, she says, it’s called Only Forever, and she loves to sing it. Her voice is so beautiful, calm, full of affection. _

_ Baekhyun doesn’t understand English, but he’s learned the song after all of the times his mother sung it to him, close in their bed, during all those countless sleepless hours. _

_ It’s been almost thirteen years since he’s heard it. He only remembers it slightly, but now he wonders, what were the exact lyrics? _

__

__

__

_ Do you think I’ll remember _

_ How you looked when you smile? _

_ Only forever _

_ That’s putting it mild _

__

__

__

They let him out of the infirmary the next morning, after certifying that his ankle is 100% okay. When Junmyeon comes to his room to give him the vitamins, he doesn’t even greet him. He only informs Baekhyun that Boa wants to see him in her office after breakfast, and then he leaves. Baekhyun already knows this is going to be a shitty day.

After breakfast at the usual table with Kyungsoo, Jongin and Chanyeol, he goes to the other side of the Museum, walking through the hallways till he arrives at the managers’ office section. He knocks three times at the door, making the golden tag with the words “ _ Kwon Boa, manager _ ” embedded on, slightly tremble.

“Come in!” he hears Boa’s calm voice from inside. Baekhyun takes a deep breath, then finally opens the door.

Boa is sitting at her mahogany desk, round glasses on her face, as she’s signing a bunch of sheets in front of her. Sunshine enters through the large window at her side, illuminating her brown long hair and the photos of her smiling daughter that’s resting on the desk. For a moment he sees his mother in her stance, and it’s such a lovely sight that for a second Baekhyun forgets where he actually is.

“Hey, you wanted to see me?” Baekhyun finally interrupts the silence.

“Hello, my dear boy!” Boa squeals in a way too enthusiastic tone, without even sparing a glance at him. “ How’s your ankle?”

“Good.” Baekhyun comes closer, slowly sitting on the chair in front of the desk, and that’s when Boa finally looks up from the sheets. “Uhm, are you still… upset about what happened yesterday night? Is that what you wanted to see me?”

“What? Oh no, no, no, I’m already over that, especially since you’re fine now. Let’s forget that incident ever happened, okay?” Boa awkwardly laughs, taking her glasses off and throwing them on the desk “I’ve actually called because of  _ this _ !”

Baekhyun’s manager suddenly pulls out from her drawer a bunch of magazines, with colourful covers and captivating titles written in capital letters all over them, displaying them on the desk in front of him. Baekhyun takes a couple of them, curiously studying them. They all present the same title, a gigantic  _ The Lion Heart _ printed in black at the top of each cover.

“ _ The Lion Heart _ , it’s an art and culture magazine set here in Seoul. They talk about all sorts of stuff, and one of their reporters recently took an interest in the topic of People’s Museums.” Boa starts to explain with a big grin on her face, while Baekhyun proceeds to browse through the pages. “They contacted us a few months ago to request an interview with an Artpiece for their special number. I think it would be useful to have some good press, that’s why I thought about you.”

Baekhyun suddenly looks up, frowning.

“You want  _ me _ to do the interview?” he asks, not sure if he’s actually the best choice to represent the Museum in front of the whole Seoul. “I don’t even know what I should say…”

“Well, we need someone to make the Museum look good in the general public’s eye and promote us. And who else other than you, you’re the face of this place! Just answer the question spontaneously: talk about your experience, what you love about the Museum, what’s the best day to come and visit, all this sort of stuff.”

“...Alright.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll stay by your side during the whole interview, so they won’t ask you questions that might be too uncomfortable for you to answer.”  _ So that I’ll make sure you won’t say anything that might hurt our image in the slightest _ , is what she actually means, Baekhyun knows it but doesn’t say out loud. “I’ve already scheduled the interview with Miss Im for next week, and asked for a permit to give you the whole morning off. It has already been accepted of course. Come here in my office next Monday morning at 9 a.m. I think that’s all for now.”

Boa goes back to the documents on the desk, and Baekhyun considers it the cue to stand up and leave the office. Before he exits however, he remembers there is still one thing he needs to ask. He suddenly has an idea in mind.

He arrives at the office door, but quickly turns around.

“Oh, Boa!”

The manager raises her eyes.

“Yes, my boy?”

“I just remembered I needed to ask you something,” Baekhyun tells her, walking back inside the office. “I thought about what happened yesterday night a lot, I wondered, why isn't there any security here at night? I know that the lock system that works with the watches is great and there are cameras everywhere, but it just baffles me how we Artpieces are left alone all night, after the Museum closes. Any of us could get easily hurt, you know? Don’t you think it would be a great idea to have at least some security at night, especially on the ground floor, you know, where the canteen is…?”

Boa peers at him through the lens of her glasses, with no readable expression on her face.

“Well, that’s actually a clever idea, I didn’t think about it,” she mumbles, after a few seconds of silence. “I’ll certainly refer this suggestion to the Director, thank you.”

She goes back to her documents, but Baekhyun is not finished yet:

“Could you also tell him… it was me specifically that made the suggestion?”

He waits for a few seconds, while Boa keeps ignoring him.

“Of course, I’ll make sure to tell him it was you,” she says, without even sparing a look at Baekhyun. “Now get out, you need to go to work.”

Baekhyun turns around, finally leaving his manager’s office.

After he quietly closes the door behind him, he leaves with a big victorious grin on his face. He has won.

“Why the hell there are so many colours, why do they have to make it so complicated?!”

“Relax, the colours are supposed to help you.”

“Well, they don’t help me at all if they all intersect with each other like this!”

Baekhyun sits on the bench on the subway platform. He feels so defeated. Everything was going great: he and Chanyeol went out of the Museum, arrived at Yeouido station, but Baekhyun was having a hard time trying to understand where exactly they had to go, and now his evening was ruined because of a stupid subway map. Chanyeol sits beside him, but Baekhyun is too embarrassed to look at him.

“Okay, relax, you’re doing great!” Chanyeol tells him, with a warm smile. “ Really, this isn’t a big deal.”

“Chanyeol, I don’t know if I can do this.”

A train passes in front of them, the people going up and down, knowing exactly what they’re doing. Baekhyun stares at them hopelessly.

“But you’re with me now, what are you so worried about?” Chanyeol says, and Baekhyun doesn’t know how to explain it.

The truth is that he has never gone this far, whenever he went outside he always stayed in the Museum’s area, because it was the only neighbourhood he knew very well. He used to go with his mother, sometimes with Kyungsoo too, but this… this is totally something new for him.

He doesn’t want Chanyeol to think that he’s lame, but he also doesn’t want to pretend like he isn’t scared. What if he gets lost, what if he gets into a bad situation while he is outside and Chanyeol can’t do anything about it? He is too unprepared for it.

So they sit in silence for a moment, while Chanyeol thinks about something to tell him to reassure him.

“You know, when I was little my mum always did this with me, when I was too scared to do something,” Chanyeol says calmly. “She said that I had to tell her about a happy moment, anything that came in my mind, and I had to imagine being there if I ever felt scared again…” He stops for a second, looks at Baekhyun in silence, but he doesn’t say anything. “Do you have a happy moment you want to tell me?”

Baekhyun doesn’t talk for a long time. Another train is arriving, and Chanyeol is about to stand up and give up, when Baekhyun suddenly decides to talk:

“When I was ten, there was a festival in Yeouido Park and they were planning to do fireworks,” he starts, eyes fixed on the ground. He takes a deep breath, he can do this. “I went there with my mother, and I was so excited about them I literally couldn’t stop jumping around, and my mom had to scold me because I was annoying people too much.”

Baekhyun looks down, trying to hide a smile.

“It wasn’t the first time I saw fireworks, but it was the first time being this close to them,” when he speaks again, his voice is closer to a whisper. “And I remember thinking that they were probably the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.”

“Okay,” Chanyeol smiles at him. “Just think about the fireworks then, I’m sure it will help you feel a lot better.”

Chanyeol stands up after that, offering Baekhyun his hand. Baekhyun looks at it for a second, before eventually taking it and standing up as well.

The train arrives after a few seconds, and Baekhyun lets Chanyeol guide him. He even closes his eyes for a moment, while he thinks about the fireworks, beautiful, red and blue lights in the night sky.

When they get on the train together, still holding hands, Baekhyun doesn’t feel so scared anymore.

There is truly something magic about Seoul at night, and Baekhyun can’t explain what it is exactly. Maybe it’s the blinding light, or the constant noise, the car honking in the street, or the amount of people passing by and not caring about them, that fascinates Baekhyun so much. It’s something totally new to him, so he looks around, too mesmerized to even think. He stops at every corner, curiously looking inside every shop, like he’s too afraid to miss something.

Chanyeol catches his hand before he can go in the wrong direction.

“Don’t get lost,” he tells him with a smile, and doesn’t let go of Baekhyun’s hand till they arrive at their destination.

They turn and walk into different streets, sometimes crowded, sometimes quieter. Chanyeol seems to know perfectly where they’re supposed to go, to the point where he drags Baekhyun around like a child, the other just too lost in looking around and not even paying attention to where they’re going. Chanyeol already knows the  _ pojangmacha _ where he wants to eat and leads Baekhyun there, into a narrowed street.

“I used to come here with my friends in high school,” Chanyeol tells him, when they’re already entering the tent. “They sell really good soju here.”

“Are you still in contact with them?” Baekhyun asks him. “I mean, your high school friends?”

“Not really,” Chanyeol shrugs, as they sit on the table. “I mean, a lot of things have happened since I finished high school, and… I don’t know, I was always busy, and I kinda stopped talking to my old friends altogether…”

Baekhyun smiles. He is just so fascinated by him. There is something about Chanyeol that is completely different from any other person he has ever met. He is so simple, and yet so interesting. Baekhyun has the strange need to learn everything about him.

A waiter comes to their table and they ask for the chicken feet and Chanyeol insists on ordering a bottle of soju too. Baekhyun is a little worried, since the Museum has always prohibited him to drink, but he never was the type of person to care too much about rules after all. Other than that, this is their special night, where they don’t have to think about the Museum. There are no rules with them tonight.

There is a group of businessmen sitting at the table next to them, jolly drinking and shouting over one another. A few tables away, there is a young couple, eating in silence and eating without even sparing a glance at each other.

“So! Are you ready for your chicken feet?” Chanyeol asks him at one point, when he sees the same waiter who took their orders coming back with plates in his hands.

“Yes,” Baekhyun whispers to him, like he’s confessing a secret. “I know it’s stupid, but I’m actually kinda excited.”

The waiter puts a large plate on their table, along with the bottle of soju they ordered. Baekhyun looks at the plate for a moment, where a pile of very recognizable chicken feet, that look like they were torn from the bird just a few moments ago, are laying. Well, this isn’t quite what he expected.

He takes the wooden chopsticks, trying to poke at them. These things sure look gross.

“Well, here we go,” Chanyeol sighs, separating his chopsticks.

They decide to taste one at the same time, even counting up to three, before shoving the chicken foot inside their mouths.

They chew in silence for a moment, analysing the taste.

“Oh my god,” Baekhyun says after just a few seconds, already covering his mouth. “This is the grossest thing I’ve ever eaten.”

Chanyeol bursts into laughter instantly, and Baekhyun has to say he doesn’t blame him.

“See, I told you!”

“Oh my god, they are so soft and squishy, ugh,” Baekhyun complains, though he also laughs along with him, because he didn’t know what he expected, to be honest. “It feels like I’m actually eating an alive animal, ew!”

“And now we have to finish them!” Chanyeol takes Baekhyun glass and pours soju into it. “Here, take this, it will help you forget about the taste.”

In the end, they don’t finish the chicken feet. They only eat half of the plate before eventually giving up and sending it away. They make it up with another bottle of soju though, since they finished the first one to help them cope with the gross taste of the feet.

It's already been one hour since they arrived in the  _ pojangmacha _ . The group of shouting businessmen has left half an hour ago, but another group of university students has arrived, who, thankfully, are just as loud as them. The young couple is still there, still eating in silence, still not talking to each other.

They already reached half of their second bottle of soju, and Baekhyun is almost sure he is totally drunk at this point. His head is spinning a little, and he feels so hot to the point where he has to take off his jacket. On the bright side, Chanyeol doesn’t seem to handle the alcohol better, since he’s been talking about nonsense for about twenty minutes already.

“You know, something really strange happened to me today,” Chanyeol tells him at one point. “The Director called me in his office, and he was furious. He shouted at me for about ten minutes, telling me that I had been too careless and that someone inside the Museum had found out about our deal. He said it was too risky to continue...”

Baekhyun listens carefully and doesn’t say a word, already knowing where this is going. He knew exactly what he was doing this morning in Boa’s office, when he suggested that idea about the security. Because he knows the Director isn’t dumb, and that he would understand that Baekhyun knowing about Chanyeol’s deal was both a dangerous and risky thing. When it comes to Baekhyun, the Director is always on thin ice.

“So, now our deal is still valid, but I have to stop having sex with those women for a while,” Chanyeol concludes, pouring more alcohol in Baekhyun’s glass.

Baekhyun takes another shot of soju, enjoying the burn in his throat, while Chanyeol keeps staring at him.

“Do you perhaps have anything to do with it?” Chanyeol asks him after a few moments.

Baekhyun looks at him in silence. When a mischievous smile slowly starts appearing on his face, Chanyeol’s eyes suddenly open wide. His expression is so comical it makes Baekhyun instantly burst in laughter. Chanyeol keeps looking at him in total amazement, which makes Baekhyun laugh even harder. He laughs so hard he swears the soju is almost coming out of his nostrils.

“No fucking way, no fucking… How the hell did you do it, Byun?” Chanyeol asks, while Baekhyun tries to suppress the chuckles. “How did you even manage to convince him?”

“ _ Ah _ , it’s because I know secrets!” Baekhyun takes another shot of soju, tasting the victory in his mouth. “Secrets that could destroy the Director and that fucking Museum’s reputation if the general public would ever find out. That’s why the Director always listens to me. He knows that I could end him at any moment.”

“Wo, that’s so cool!” Chanyeol cheers, shouting over the university friends group’s voices. “Why don’t you do it then? Why don’t you finally get that place shut down forever?”

“Because I’m just one man against a gigantic enterprise, and I don’t want to risk it all, because they would probably destroy me,” Baekhyun explains, suddenly acting like a knows-it-all. “So I won’t reveal anything of course, but I mean the Director doesn’t know that! Plus it’s fun to play around to get what I want.”

Chanyeol seems intrigued by his answer, as he keeps smirking and looking at him like the only thing he wants right now is to be able to read Baekhyun’s soul.

“And what’s your secret then, Byun Baekhyun?”

“Oh, I have one, and it’s a very big one too!” Baekhyun chuckles, while Chanyeol pours more soju in his glass. He’s so drunk, but he can’t stop, he loves this feel of intoxication a little too much. “But I can’t tell you, of course.”

“Ow, but you already know my secret, that’s not fair!” Chanyeol whines, trying to kick his chair, but he misses the spot and actually ends up kicking the table. They laugh and make jokes about it, till they get tired of it and continue with their conversation.

“I know another secret though, this is also about the Director,” Chanyeol says, when they’ve finally stopped laughing. “Do you want to know about it?”

Baekhyun is still giggling, already taking what it’s probably his sixth shot of soju.

“Yeah, shoot, what is it?” he asks, moments after he’s about to drink.

“The vitamins.”

Baekhyun stops abruptly when his hand reaches mid-air. He can feel it, the air around them suddenly changing. Nobody is laughing anymore, not even the people from the other tables. Even when he finally takes the shot, it tastes bitter.

“Uhm, what about them?” Baekhyun asks him, putting the tiny glass down, now that his attention has been grasped.

“You know those tiny pills they give us every morning?” Chanyeol talks like he’s perfectly sober now, so calm and collected. “Well, I don’t think they’re vitamins at all. I don’t know what they are exactly, but I know for sure that they’re lying to us.”

Baekhyun grimaces, not understanding what he’s talking about.

“What do you mean?”

“Listen, when I agreed to that deal with the Director, he told me something really strange,” Chanyeol says, staring directly into Baekhyun’s eyes. “He told me that I had to stop taking the vitamins every morning, but that I had to pretend I still take them in front of Junmyeon or else someone would find out. I’m not sure of this, but it’s like… it’s like if I kept taking those pills then I wouldn’t be able to-”

“Then you wouldn’t be able to have sex with someone,” Baekhyun finishes the sentence in his stance. Now he understands what Chanyeol was trying to say, but he’s still confused about what this whole thing means. “But… why would they give them to every Artpiece then? What’s the point? There aren’t even women in this Department.”

“I don’t know. But you have to stop taking the pills.”

“But why-”

“Please, Baekhyun,” Chanyeol snaps, his voice becoming suddenly serious. “I told you, I don’t know what those pills are, but if those aren’t vitamins like they’re telling us, then I can’t possibly imagine what kind of things they’re giving to us.”

Baekhyun is a little freaked out right now, he admits it. He is a little shocked, and he still doesn’t know who he should really trust, but he decides to listen to what Chanyeol has to say anyway.

“When Junmyeon gives you the vial in the morning take out one pill and then flush it down the toilet,” Chanyeol calmly tells him. He even asks a passing waiter for a pen, so he can write all the instructions down on a paper napkin. “They count the pills every night, so they’ll know if you aren’t taking them. You have to get rid of them without  _ anyone _ knowing, is it clear? Don’t tell anyone about this, not your friends, not other Artpieces and especially not your manager okay?”

Chanyeol gives him the napkin, and Baekhyun puts it in his pocket without any more questions. He’s trembling a little, and his head is spinning, probably because of the alcohol.

“Okay…” Baekhyun agrees with a soft whisper, feeling the napkin in his pocket.

“Now, let’s get out of here,” Chanyeol mutters, abruptly standing up. He stumbles on the chair, and it falls on the ground with a loud metallic sound. Nobody is laughing anymore. “Fuck, I’m getting nauseous…”

They wander through the cold night, laughing together, still tipsy from the soju. Baekhyun has forgotten about their weird conversation about the vitamins already. He stares amazed at the people around him. All the lights are blinding him, but it’s so beautiful, he has never felt so excited. They arrive closer to the river, finding a bench where to rest. Baekhyun is still drunk, so Chanyeol abandons him for a moment to go buy him a bottle of water from the nearest convenience store.

Baekhyun waits patiently, staring, mesmerized by the movement of the river, until he feels Chanyeol’s fingers tapping on his shoulder. He hands Baekhyun the bottle and then proceeds to sit beside him. After Baekhyun has drunk enough water for him to calm down, they sit there in silence, with the sound of the wind being the only noise around them.

“Can I ask you something?” Baekhyun mutters at one point.

“Sure,” Chanyeol answers right away.

“Do you have a family?”

Chanyeol takes a moment to drink from the bottle before answering the question.

“I do. Everyone has one.”

“Then why are you here with me and not with them?”

There is a moment of complete silence between them, with even the streets around them being totally quiet. The wind blows, messing their hair a little.

“Well, I can see my family every night after work,” Chanyeol says, half-smiling. “But today I promised to eat chicken feet with you, didn’t I?”

Baekhyun peers at him. The wind blows again and he feels so cold right now. He wishes he would have brought a heavier coat with him.

“Can you… can you tell me more about them?” he asks, in a hushed voice.

Chanyeol doesn’t waste a second more and immediately tells him about them. He has a mother, a father, a lovely older sister. He loves them very much and they love him as well. They supported him in his decision to become an Artpiece and that’s why now he’s too afraid to tell them he’s become unhappy here. Baekhyun listens to every single word, he watches Chanyeol while he talks, noticing how his eyes brighten every time he mentions his mother’s cooking or the way he keeps smiling whenever he remembers something funny about them.

Baekhyun wishes he could love someone like that. He wishes he was capable of caring about someone so deeply, but his heart feels so cold.

“What about you?” Chanyeol asks him when he finishes talking. “Don’t you have a family?”

Baekhyun takes a deep breath, glancing at the pitch black river in front of them, the dark waters flowing in front of him, swallowing everything. He has never felt colder than this moment.

“I don’t know who my father is, but I had a mother once…” he whispers, finally letting out one of his precious secrets. “I really loved her. But she’s gone now.”

Baekhyun knows Chanyeol is looking at him right now, but he keeps staring at the dark river. Somehow he feels safer like this.

“I’m sorry. I-” Chanyeol stutters, trying to find the right words. “I shouldn’t have asked you...”

Baekhyun hates this. He doesn’t want Chanyeol to apologize. This is his fault, it’s his own fault for keeping all of this a secret, for never talking about this to anybody, and it’s his fault if Chanyeol is apologizing just because he made a simple question. But he doesn’t want to push Chanyeol away, he can’t do it anymore. After all that’s happened between them, he has to trust him.

“No, she’s not dead. She…” Baekhyun tries to explain, also struggling to find the right words. “One morning, when I was twelve, I went back into my room and she was gone. And the thing that I hate the most is that I knew this was going to happen. She was always crying, she always looked so miserable whenever I tried to talk to her. So I knew it was just a matter of time.”

He takes another deep breath, feeling the chilling air against his nostrils.

“But somehow I had this tiny hope inside my heart that she could love me enough to find the strength not to leave me. But it wasn’t like that, and I think that’s what hurt me the most.”

Silence falls between them. Baekhyun knows he’s now crying, his vision is blurry and he struggles to stop the tears from falling. He suddenly feels Chanyeol’s hand on his back, but Baekhyun doesn’t dare to look at him.

“Well, I think she did love you a little bit, after all,” he hears Chanyeol’s voice, so sweet and gentle and it has somehow the power to calm him for a second. “It’s just that… sometimes bad things happen in life, and not everyone is strong enough to handle it.”

“Tell me the truth, did you really think I was an asshole?” Baekhyun asks. He finally looks at Chanyeol, despite feeling mortified about the tears staining his cheeks. “Be honest with me, please.”

“I did think you were a little cold in the beginning, yes,” Chanyeol confesses in a single breath. “Also, everyone always talked about you like you were a spoiled bitch that constantly wanted to be at the centre of attention. Every other Artpiece, beside that Kyungsoo guy hated you, so I thought I had to do it too… But I assure you, after I got to know you better, I see you’re not like that at all. You understand me.”

“What do you mean?”

“All of them, they-” A beat, Chanyeol takes a deep breath before continuing. “They act like they love working there. They always say nice stuff, and act like being an Artpiece is the best thing in the world, like the Museum is the best place to have ever existed. I don’t know why, but I feel like they are either too brainwashed or they’re just too afraid to say the truth. You were the only one that seemed sincere all the time.”

Baekhyun feels like drowning: this is the first time in years he’s crying in front of someone. It’s so embarrassing and he doesn’t want to be here, he wants to run away and be left alone, leave and never see Chanyeol again. Crying in front of someone and showing all of this vulnerability is not something that he’s used to, but he doesn’t want to keep this burden inside him forever. He’s exhausted, he has to let go.

“I hate everyone in there.” Baekhyun doesn’t know what makes him admit it. Maybe it’s the alcohol, maybe it’s the fact that he feels like he can finally trust someone. But saying all of this, after years of completely bottling up, feels so, so relieving. “I hate how everyone treats me. Like I’m this special gem that nobody is allowed to touch. They all treat me like this: the managers, the staff, even the people looking at me. I hate how they make me feel, like I have to be perfect all the fucking time.”

He lets the tears flow, he doesn’t try to stop them this time. There’s no one here judging him, no sparkling makeup on his face, no expensive clothes on him. He’s free to cry in front of someone, for once in his life.

Chanyeol comes a little closer to him and somehow that makes him feel a little warmer.

“You don’t have to be perfect all the time,” Chanyeol tells him, fondness in his tone. “I know that’s a hard thing to realize, when everyone is constantly telling you how great and amazing you have to be, but you’re human too. We’re not objects, you’re allowed to have flaws, and most importantly, you’re allowed to have feelings.”

“I know I just…” Baekhyun sighs loudly. “I just want to  _ leave _ .”

He isn’t talking about just leaving the Museum physically. He wants to get rid of it all, of all the strings that keep him attached to that place. Of all the fears, the discomfort and worries that won’t let him leave, of all the good memories that are now too painful to remember.

There’s silence again, then he feels something gently touching his palm, only a second later he realizes that Chanyeol is trying to hold his hand. Baekhyun lets him do it, feeling like he can finally breathe again when Chanyeol intertwines their fingers.

“You know, I think that place did horrible things to both of us,” Chanyeol says, holding Baekhyun’s hand tighter. “And I will never forgive them, not the Director, not any of those fuckers. But it’s the thought that one day I’m going to leave all of this behind that keeps me going.”

“But I’m tired. I’m so tired of waiting.”

“I know.” Chanyeol tightens his hold even more. “I’m tired too.”

They stay like that for a moment, still holding hands, waiting for Baekhyun to calm down. When the tears finally stop, Chanyeol still doesn’t let go of his hand.

“You already saved me more than once.” Chanyeol whispers after a while. Their hands are still intertwined, but he isn’t looking at Baekhyun anymore. “I wish I could do the same thing for you.”

Baekhyun closes his eyes and exhales. He knows that’s an impossible thing to do, it’s already too late for someone to save him. And no one, not even someone so good-hearted like Chanyeol can save someone that was born irreversibly broken.

Im Yoona has really beautiful legs. Baekhyun can’t stop staring at them. The way they fit perfectly in those skinny jeans she’s wearing, and the way she crosses them one over the other certainly doesn’t help.

“I’m really glad you decided to accept this interview, Baekhyun.” the _ Lion Heart _ journalist says, with a lovely smile on her lips. “You too, Mrs. Kwon, I hope we can work together and make a good article out of this story.”

“Of course,” Boa says, giving her a warm smile. “We’re also happy to have you here with us, Miss Im.”

Baekhyun is sitting on a chair in Boa’s office, with his manager sitting on his side and Im Yoona, the journalist from  _ The Lion Heart _ , in front of both of them, with her lap full of sheets and a recorder in her hand.

Yoona has a pretty face and overall looks very young, even though she’s probably Baekhyun’s age. With big eyes, straight brown hair falling over her shoulders, and a gorgeous smile. That smile is sweet and comforting, it makes Baekhyun feel a little more secure.

They start the interview with the basic personal questions, how old are you, where are you from, for how long have you been an Artpiece. Baekhyun answers the first two truthfully, but lies to the last question. He has to lie every time, making up complicated stories that seem plausible, in order to hide the unsayable truth.

“Baekhyun, how many hours do you spend outside?” Im Yoona asks him at some point.

“I rarely go outside,” Baekhyun answers, almost out of habit, but suddenly stops when he notices the glare that Boa is sending him. Right, he has to lie again. He can’t make it look like the Museum is mistreating their Artpieces. “But… that’s just me! I mean, we  _ can  _ go outside, usually every night from eight to midnight.”

“Just four hours a day?” Yoona asks, almost surprised. “And how do you keep track of time?”

“We have the watches, every Artpiece has one,” Baekhyun says, showing his wrist to Im Yoona, where his black watch is. “They use them to send notifications, Artpieces also need them to enter their personal rooms. There are digital panels on every door as you saw, so they can also send us permissions when we need to get in or out of the Museum. It’s also useful for the staff to know our position at any moment.”

Im Yoona grimaces.

“So… it’s like a tracking device?” she says.

Baekhyun is baffled by the question. Well, it  _ is _ a tracking device after all, though that doesn’t sound too right. He is still surprised, but he tries to answer anyway. Right after he opens his mouth though, Boa instantly speaks over him:

“Miss Im, I think these types of questions aren’t… exactly appropriate for this interview,” she explains, a fake smile on her face. Baekhyun has learned to recognize that smile. Boa might look like she’s calm and happy, but he knows that deep inside she’s annoyed with Miss Im’s questions. “Maybe we should proceed and talk about something else, shall we?”

Im Yoona goggles at her, a little startled by the sudden intervention. She could probably also hear the fake kindness behind Boa’s words.

“Uhm… yea.” The journalist quickly looks through all the sheets on her lap, trying to find the one with the questions written on it. “Baekhyun how would you… uhm, how would you describe a typical day for you?”

She’s clearly uncomfortable right now, after Boa’s intervention, but Baekhyun tries to ignore it and answers the question anyway:

“The alarm is set at 6 a.m., for every Artpiece,” he says, glancing at Boa, just to be sure he’s not telling anything wrong. “You know already how we are separated into different Departments, depending on our gender and age, so each one of them has a Head of Department that takes responsibilities over their Artpieces. They knock at our door, usually right after the alarm, and they give us the assigned vitamins.”

“Vitamins?” Im Yoona interrupts him again. She sounds even more confused than before. “What kind of vitamins are they?”

“I don’t think I was very clear before, Miss Im, but these are not the questions we agreed on!” Boa suddenly intervenes, without the layer of fake kindness she had before. When she loses her patience, that’s’ when she starts to get really aggressive. Im Yoona visibly stiffens. “So I suggest you stick to the approved program or I’ll end this interview right away!”

The young journalist looks at her with wide eyes, now clearly uncomfortable. Baekhyun stays silent, ignoring the tension in the air.

“Yes, sure,” Im Yoona says in a weak voice. She looks at all the sheets again, her fingers visibly trembling. “I’m terribly sorry about this, it won’t happen again…”

When she asks the next question - something about what’s the best thing about working as an Artpiece - Boa doesn’t let Baekhyun speak. Instead she answers the question herself, talking like she’s speaking on his behalf. Baekhyun doesn’t even care anymore, he’s just too upset about what just happened. He looks at Boa, who is having a conversation with the journalist, all smiles and laughs, the two now acting like they’re suddenly best friends.

Im Yoona continues with her questions, but Baekhyun doesn’t open his mouth again, with Boa doing all the work in his place.

_ The vitamins _ . Why did Boa suddenly get so aggressive about them?

Baekhyun looks around him, feeling in such an alien place. This is not his home, it’s a cage, a horrible place where he was trapped a long time ago.

It’s clearer than ever now. They are lying to him.

The next morning Chanyeol is eating with Jongin and Kyungsoo at their usual table. He looks like he’s having fun with them, and Baekhyun feels guilty about ruining that peaceful moment, but he doesn’t have any other choice.

Baekhyun is furious. He’s so angry that when he arrives at that table he doesn’t even greet them, he just looks intensely at Chanyeol and tells him:

“Come with me, we need to do something.”

Chanyeol looks baffled for a moment, but he still obeys and gets up from his chair.

“Wait, where are you two going?” Kyungsoo complains, with his mouth still full of food. “We were having fun!”

Baekhyun doesn’t have time to deal with them. He briefly glances at Kyungsoo and Jongin, before turning his back to them.

“Sorry, you’ll have fun another time,” he tells them before leaving.

Baekhyun walks fast, with Chanyeol following behind, who doesn’t understand what’s going on.

“Baekhyun?” Chanyeol keeps calling him, but it’s like Baekhyun is not even listening to him. “What is going on? Please, where are you going?”

Baekhyun walks through the hallways till he arrives at the infirmary door.

He barges into the infirmary, slamming the door and goes straight where Yixing is only starting to take his jacket off.

“What are those pills?” he asks, outspokenly, without any hesitation.

Yixing looks at both them, confused. He probably arrived here just a few minutes ago and he’s already getting interrogated.

“Uhm, I don’t think I follow you…?”

“I know for sure they’re not fucking vitamins, so quit with the acting and tell me what those things are exactly!” Baekhyun shouts furiously, without wasting any time.

If anything, that sentence manages to make Yixing a little nervous.

“Listen Baekhyun, first, I think you should calm down,” the doctor tries to tell him, and Chanyeol follows a few moments later:

“Baekhyun, please, let’s get out of here,” Baekhyun hears him say from behind, but he doesn’t care. This time he won’t listen to anyone, the truth is the only thing he wants, and he’s going to get it, whether they like it or not.

He ignores Chanyeol for a moment and instead shifts all of his attention on Yixing. Baekhyun comes closer to the doctor, pushing him back until he’s forced to sit on the swivel chair in front of the desk. Baekhyun puts both of his hands on the armrests, staring at the doctor with dark eyes.

“Okay, listen to me, Yixing,” he starts, in a hushed voice. “I am sick and tired of people lying to me all the time, and I’m tired of being nice to those people who don’t deserve any of my sympathy.”

Yixing gulps, looking at him with quivering eyes.

“Baekhyun, please let’s get out of here…” Chanyeol keeps pleading, but Baekhyun ignores him again. Instead, he decides to go on with his little speech:

“You think you’re the only one who can make up lies?” he tells Yixing now that he has grasped his attention. “Well, I can make up lies too, I could make up stories about you, something that would end your career in a single second. And who do you think they’re gonna believe, between you and me? You know for sure they’re gonna listen to me. So now tell me in detail what those pills are or I assure you, there’s gonna be consequences for you.”

Yixing thinks about it for a moment, looking around nervously, then staring back into Baekhyun’s eyes.

“Alright,” the doctor finally agrees, with a long sigh. “Let’s go into my office.”

Baekhyun finally lets him stand up from the chair and starts following the doctor. Before they get there, however, Yixing stops and turns around to face him again.

“Wait, what about him?” he asks, making a sign with his chin at Chanyeol.

Baekhyun looks at Chanyeol too, taking a decision on the spot. It’s weird how they’re talking about him like he’s not in the room, when Chanyeol is literally a few meters in front of them, looking at Baekhyun and the doctor like a lost puppy that doesn’t understand what’s going on.

“He stays,” Baekhyun finally says. “He needs to hear about this too.”

Yixing shrugs and disappears into his office. Baekhyun is right about to enter, when he notices that Chanyeol is next to him, looking at him in a strange way, like he’s totally fascinated and terrified of Baekhyun at the same time.

“What?” he asks.

“Nothing, just…” Chanyeol can’t find the fitting words to describe it for a second. “Wow, you’re really scary when you want to.”

Baekhyun smirks at him, as they walk into Yixing’s office.

“Thanks. I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Yixing lets them both sit on the two leather chairs in front of his desk. For a moment they stay in silence, as they wait while Yixing searches for something inside the drawers.

“I’m gonna get fired for this,” Yixing mutters, before eventually taking out a block of sheets and dropping it on the desk. He gives Baekhyun a couple of sheets, and the Artpiece studies the documents while Yixing explains what they mean.

“You were right, those aren’t actually vitamins,” Yixing says. “It’s actually called a  _ doxaphonen _ , it’s a new substance that’s been discovered very recently. It’s not on the market yet, they’re actually testing it in here for the first time.”

Baekhyun looks up from the sheets to stare at the doctor.

“So they’re using Artpieces as cavies?” he asks, already sounding furious.

Yixing shrugs.

“If you want to put it like that, then yes.” The doctor gives Chanyeol another sheet, the one where the effects of the  _ doxaphonen _ are listed on. “It’s like a drug, similar to an opium, but it has a much longer effect and it tones down emotions instead. So anything, from sadness, happiness, love and well, even sexual pulsion... they aren’t completely removed of course, you can still feel them, but the  _ doxaphonen _ lessens them extremely.”

“But why would they do it to us?”

“Because they don’t want the Artpieces to fall in love.”

Chanyeol and Baekhyun look up at the same time, both too baffled to talk anymore. This isn’t exactly what they expected. To be honest they don’t know what to expect exactly, but this new revelation is way more shocking than they could have ever imagined.

“ _ What _ ?” one of them says at one point. Only after a while, Baekhyun realizes he’s the one that opened his mouth and asked the question.

Yixing takes a deep breath, sitting more comfortably on the chair, before starting to talk again:

“It happened in the past - many times actually, as far as I know-” the doctor patiently explains, “that Artpieces fell in love with people outside of the Museum. You’re humans too, so of course that could happen, it’s inevitable. But the problem is, whenever that happened, Artpieces would start to become extremely demanding. They’d ask for shorter shifts and more free hours, more time to go outside, and in worst cases they would contact lawyers to end their contract earlier or even run away. The Director tried to introduce the pills a few years ago, so things like this wouldn’t happen anymore.”

The room is silent for a few seconds. Baekhyun is astonished, disgusted, dismayed, and a whole other emotions he can’t even find words to describe. So this is why he always felt like this. He always felt tired, always felt useless, like there he had no purpose in life. He can’t believe it was actually because of the vitamins.

The Museum lied to him, they made him feel like shit for years, and this is only because they want Artpieces to act like their slaves forever.

“They basically don’t want us to leave, ever,” he whispers, still too shocked to speak properly.

“Yes, that’s right…”

So that’s the truth. Baekhyun already suspected that, but this is just the ultimate confirmation that the Museum doesn’t even see them as people. They want to keep them inside their glass cases forever, like display objects that are only useful to please and attract the public.

Chanyeol is still not talking, looking down with a distraught face.

“God, this is really fucked up,” he simply says, without even raising his eyes.

“Now listen you two,” Yixing suddenly says, moving his gaze from Chanyeol to Baekhyun. “If anyone ever found out that I’ve told you about this stuff, I’d get fired on the spot, you understand?”

“It won’t happen, don’t worry,” Baekhyun promises him. “But you also have to promise not to tell anyone that we know, okay?”

They make a deal, even shaking hands and they promise to never talk about it to anyone. Baekhyun stands up from his chair, but Chanyeol still doesn’t move.

“Chanyeol,” Baekhyun calls him, voice soothing and gentle. “Let’s go now.”

Chanyeol stands up slowly, like he’s too tired to even move. He doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t even look at him. His eyes are empty, staring into nothingness.

Maybe he shouldn’t have let Chanyeol in with him. Maybe it was a reckless choice, maybe he shouldn’t have insisted so much to have him there. Baekhyun thought he was doing the right thing, but Chanyeol looked way too disturbed about what Yixing told them, and it’s all his fault.

He’s still thinking about it later at night, right after he just finished taking a shower, when he suddenly hears someone unsurely knocking on his door. He goes to open it, surprisingly finding Chanyeol in front of the doorway.

“Hi,” Chanyeol tells him right away, sounding a little breathless. “Can I come in?”

Baekhyun nods, opening the door wide.

“Yeah, sure.”

He lets him in, slowly closing the door.

Chanyeol walks hesitantly into the room, and looks around fascinated, admiring the surroundings. He stares at the double bed in the middle of the room, at the heavy curtains and of course, the view of the river outside of the window.

“Wow, you have such a beautiful room,” he murmurs, still looking around him in awe. “It’s so big…”

All of the others Artpieces’ rooms are about half the size of Baekhyun’s one, not even Head of Departments have this amount of space for themselves. It’s so obvious they would give the best room in the dorm to Baekhyun, he’s their star after all. It’s such a cliché, but Baekhyun has to admit he genuinely loves this room. It’s the only place where he’s comfortable with himself, it’s his space, his home.

“Yeah, it’s the largest in the whole dorm, they told me it’s also the oldest one,” Baekhyun explains, sitting on the double bed. “What are you doing here? Is everything alright?”

“I don’t know,” Chanyeol sighs, coming closer and slowly sitting on the bed beside him. “I kinda didn’t want to be alone tonight, if that’s okay with you.”

Baekhyun nods, even though he isn’t sure Chanyeol sees him in the semi-dark.

“Of course.”

“You know, the reason why I came here is because what we found out today… it really scares me,” Chanyeol confesses in one breath.

“Yeah, me too.”

“I just… don’t want to lose myself,” Chanyeol whispers, sounding distressed. “I’m scared they’ll try to turn me into an object without feelings, and I don’t want that, I want to be me and I- I can’t believe that there are actually people who would knowingly do this to us…”

“We can’t tell anyone about this, right?” Baekhyun asks, even though he probably already knows the answer. “Maybe it’s better like this, isn’t it?”

He’s right, maybe sometimes lies hurt way less than the truth.

Maybe it would have been better for them too, if they never knew about this. But Baekhyun isn’t so sure about that. Sometimes the truth hurts, it can destroy you, it can make you miserable, but it’s always better than living in lies forever.

They don’t say anything after that. They stay in silence, sitting side by side in the darkness. They are together, but they somehow feel so lonely right now. They have no one, nobody is on their side, nobody is coming here to rescue them. This place is slowly killing them and they can’t do anything about it.

“Can you sing for me?” Baekhyun whispers at some point, lying down on the bed. He sounds like a child who is too scared of the dark and needs some comfort.

Chanyeol is a little surprised, but he still comes back to sit on the edge of Baekhyun’s bed.

“Sure,” he answers. “What do you want me to sing?”

“That song you played with the guitar the other time,” Baekhyun murmurs, hugging the sheets closer. “The one about the angel.”

“Of course.”

Chanyeol doesn’t waste a second and starts singing for him, right after taking a deep breath. His voice is beautiful, it’s raw, soft, and it feels so real. Baekhyun listens to him attentively and even though he’s not facing him, he somehow knows that Chanyeol has a sad look on his face. He sings like his mother did, in those nights where she felt so blue that singing was the only thing that could cheer her up. He stays silent as Chanyeol continues with his song.

Baekhyun falls asleep before he can even reach the last verse.

For the first time in a long time, there are no dreams in his sleep.


	2. Supernova

There’s a big storm outside when Baekhyun hears a loud knock on his door in the middle of the night. He stumbles out of bed, his eyes still half closed, without even wearing a shirt. He doesn’t even bother checking the time, taking for granted that this is Junmyeon’s morning knockings, but when he opens the door he finds Kyungsoo instead.

“Hey, uhm…” Baekhyun mumbles, still half asleep. “What are you doing here?”

“I’ve brought the cigarettes?” Kyungsoo tells him, like it was supposed to be an obvious answer. “We were supposed to meet here at 5, did you forget it?”

“Sorry, I think… yeah, I totally forgot.”

“Of course you forgot,” Kyungsoo scoffs, like he knew this was going to happen. “Listen I’m okay if you don’t want to be my friend anymore, but don’t purposely ignore me. It’s really rude, okay?”

“What?” Baekhyun doesn’t understand what he’s talking about. “I’m not purposely ignoring you!”

“Well, I don’t know if you realized but you’re spending all of your free time with Chanyeol!” Kyungsoo insists, barging into Baekhyun’s room and closing the door behind him. “First you couldn’t stand him and now you’re suddenly best friends? You always leave me alone to eat with Jongin, while you two go out making your mysterious schemes, or whatever. Like remember yesterday, at breakfast?”

Baekhyun sighs. He knows what he did yesterday was extremely rude, but in his defense it was a dramatic situation. He doesn’t have any explanation to justify him, though.

“I’m sorry, it’s… complicated actually,” is the only thing Baekhyun manages to say, after a long yawn. “But I’m not doing it because I don’t want to be your friend anymore. It’s just that I have a lot of thoughts in my mind lately. I’m really sorry if I ignored you, it won’t happen again, I promise.”

“Fine, you’re forgiven… for now.”

Kyungsoo literally throws himself on Baekhyun’s bed, even bouncing a little to test the softness of the mattress, already putting a cigarette in his mouth.

“But if you try to bail on me at breakfast another time then I’m not talking with you ever again, okay?” Kyungsoo says, but it’s clear from his tone that he is joking.

Baekhyun smiles, sitting on the bed next to him. When Kyungsoo offers him the cigarettes, that’s the sign that their fighting is officially over.

“Why?” Baekhyun sneers, taking a cigarette from the pack. “Don’t you like Jongin?”

“I mean… he’s fine, I guess.” Kyungsoo manages to light the match right away this time. “He talks a little too much, though, and he has this weird obsession with my voice.”

“What?” Baekhyun laughs.

“Yes, he keeps saying that I sing like an angel, or something,” Kyungsoo says, lighting his cigarette. “I mean, I’m sure my performances are nothing in comparison to his. Do you know he’s really good at dancing?

They talk and laugh together, just like the other times, until their cigarettes are over and the sun is already up in the sky.

For a moment, it looks like everything is back to normal again.

At 6 a.m. Junmyeon knocks on Baekhyun’s door as usual. The Head of Department is furious when he sees Kyungsoo in his room – _again_ \- and scolds Baekhyun like every other time, there are some phony apologies like always, before Junmyeon hands him the vitamins and leaves.

Baekhyun closes the door, and Kyungsoo stands up from the bed right away, asking for his vitamins.

Baekhyun looks at the vials for a second.

He has stopped taking the pills a few days ago, doing exactly what Chanyeol told him, taking one pill at time and flushing it down the toilet, so no one would find out. But now he looks at Kyungsoo, realizing that he’s still taking the pills, just like every other Artpiece in here. He knows he isn’t supposed to tell anyone about the _doxaphonen_ , but Kyungsoo is his best friend, he can’t let him do this.

“Don’t take them,” Baekhyun says.

“What are you talking about?” Kyungsoo stretches his arm, asking for the pills. “I _have_ to take them. Baekhyun, just give me the vial, come on, they’re gonna give me penalties for this!”

“No,” Baekhyun insists. “Please, just stop taking them.”

Kyungsoo frowns, staring at Baekhyun like he doesn’t recognize him anymore.

“You’re scaring me,” he mumbles. “What is up with you lately?”

“Look, I know it sounds really weird, but… Trust me on this, okay? Don’t take these pills ever again. They’re not… they’re not good for you.”

“Fine, okay, I won’t take them!” Kyungsoo finally agrees, though he still sounds annoyed. “You’re acting so fucking weird lately!”

Baekhyun goes into the bathroom and explains to Kyungsoo how to do it, flushing down the toilet both of their pills. Kyungsoo isn’t convinced, he still believes that Baekhyun is going crazy, but he still watches him as he throws away the pills.

Baekhyun doesn’t tell him about the _doxaphonen_ , but he does warn him that those aren’t vitamins like they’re telling them.

“Whatever,” Kyungsoo says in the end, when he leaves his room. “I don’t care, do whatever you want. But if I get caught and get penalties because of this, then it’s all your fault, Byun.”

When Kyungsoo finally leaves his room, Baekhyun falls on his bed again, panting hard. The thunders get louder outside and the rain is flowing down his window like a cascade.

Maybe he’s going against the rules, going against Yixing’s deal, but he doesn’t care. Screw all promises and deals, there are only a few people he truly cares about in this place, and Kyungsoo is one of them. He won’t let the Museum ruin him, not this time.

Chanyeol takes him to Seoul countless times. He takes Baekhyun to see Changdeokgung, they sit down and watch all the pretty girls in hanbok, and Baekhyun swears he would take a picture with every single one of them if only he was allowed to have a phone. They take a walk in the garden and then drink tea in Insadong before eventually going back to the Museum.

One time they go to a _noraebang_ together, which turns out pretty badly in the end, because Baekhyun doesn’t know any of the songs, but they still laugh and have a fun time together.

Baekhyun is getting a little more confident with the city and can now read the subway map almost perfectly. One time, while they’re in the train, directed to Hongdae, Baekhyun asks Chanyeol if he can rest his head on his shoulder for a while. And he falls asleep on Chanyeol’s shoulder like that, so peacefully, even though it only lasts a few minutes.

They never talk about the Museum, or the pills again. It’s a non-explicit rule they both want to follow ever since that day happened. There’s no time for thinking about that stuff when they’re out together.

One night they are in Yeouido Park and Baekhyun is walking aimlessly between the cherry trees. Chanyeol stays a little meters behind, watching over him.

“You know, I often came here with my mother when I was little,” Baekhyun tells him, admiring the trees around him. “We used to come here every spring, and see the cherry blossoms together.”

He walks in the completely empty park, watching if there is any flower around him. But the trees are completely naked without leaves and flowers, so gloomy and meagre.

“I want to go back here when it’s spring,” Baekhyun says, turning around to face Chanyeol. “Let’s go back here together, when it’s the cherry blossom season, okay?”

Chanyeol smiles at him.

“Of course,” he agrees. “Whatever you want.”

“It’s a promise, then?”

“It is.”

Baekhyun comes closer and sees that something’s odd with Chanyeol. He admires Chanyeol’s face in the semi-dark, studying him like a portrait, observing him and finally realizing what he was missing.

“What is it?” Chanyeol whispers, noticing that Baekhyun is lost in his own thoughts.

“Nothing, just…” Baekhyun looks at him, intrigued. “I didn’t realize you were this beautiful under the moonlight.”

He sees Chanyeol blushing a little, but he doesn’t falter. He stares back at him and rebuts with:

“Well, you’re really beautiful too.”

Baekhyun is stunned and he beams at him. Many people told him he was beautiful – handsome, pretty, whatever - they constantly said it to him, but he never cared once. This time though, he feels his heart suddenly beating faster.

He never thought of himself as beautiful. Maybe he was average, conventionally attractive, if anything. He knew he had a pretty face and a nice body, but when he looked at himself in the mirror he hated it, he hated how much his hair looked ruined, how skinny he was forcing himself to be. Chanyeol looks at him, and somehow Baekhyun understands he’s telling the truth. Chanyeol sees him for what he is.

He called him beautiful _,_ Baekhyun thinks, and he believes him.

Baekhyun comes closer, whispers to Chanyeol to pretend it’s spring and that there are pink flowers blooming all over the trees. Chanyeol smiles, closes his eyes, when Baekhyun takes his hand and guides him all around the cherry trees.

A few days later there’s a scandal at the Museum. Baekhyun goes down to have breakfast like usual and sees all the Artpieces in chaos, fighting and shouting over each other.

“Is this true?” he hears someone yelling. “I can’t believe this!”

They are all in the middle of the canteen, assembling around one table, trying to jump all over each other to grab something in the center. Baekhyun tries to stand on his tiptoes to take a look, but the crowd is so fit he can’t see anything.

“Hey, what’s going on?” he asks Jaehyun, one of the younger Artpieces.

“Someone published an anonymous article in a magazine about our Museum,” Jaehyun answers, pointing at the crowd. “It says… pretty heavy stuff. You might want to read it too.”

Baekhyun manages, after countless pushes and fights, to get a copy of the magazine for himself. His heartbeat stops for a moment when he sees that it’s a copy of _The Lion Heart_.

He flips the pages over and over, and finally finds his interview, the article written by Im Yoona, with countless photos of him wearing makeup and of the Museum all over the page. He quickly takes a look at it, but doesn’t find anything wrong with it, except the fact it doesn’t match exactly how the interview went. The answers are edited and twisted around to make the Museum look good, and they don’t reflect Baekhyun’s answers at all, but that’s not a problem, he expected this was going to happen anyway.

When Baekhyun turns the page where the next article is written, he realizes this is why everyone is going crazy this morning. He stares at the title, completely baffled.

**HOW THE PEOPLE’S STAR MUSEUM OF SEOUL IS DRUGGING AND MISTREATING THEIR ARTPIECES an article by Anonymous**

He quickly reads it all, shocked about how accurate everything is. The article starts with talking about the Artpieces schedules, denouncing their lack of free hours and of vacations, talking about the terrible amount of pressure they have to go through every single day.

Then it proceeds to mention the vitamins, and this is where things get creepily accurate.

“ _The Museum has assigned special pills to every single one of their Artpieces_ ,” the article says, “ _camouflaging them as vitamins, lying to them and completely disregarding their feelings. In reality, these pills are made of a recently discovered substance that inhibits their emotions and sexual feelings._

 _Why, you might ask? Because they don’t want their Artpieces to fall in love and run away, this is why._ ”

Baekhyun closes the magazine and takes the copy with him, trying to hide it from everyone. Even in the hallways everyone is in shambles: there are staff members running everywhere in panic, managers on their phones shouting and asking for explanations.

Someone grabs his arms and Baekhyun turns around, hoping it’s not Boa. He relaxes when he notices it’s just Chanyeol.

“Have you read that article?” he asks Baekhyun right away. His face is red and his eyes are slightly quivering in concern.

“Yes,” Baekhyun says, handing him the copy of _The Lion Heart_. “This is so strange. How would they know about this? Have you told anybody about the pills?”

“No,” Chanyeol answers right away. “Have you?”

“Me neither…”

It’s obvious then. There is a spy inside the Museum.

“How did you know about the vitamins?” Kyungsoo asks him the same day, while they’re walking downstairs to have dinner.

“What?” Baekhyun turns around to face him. “What do you mean?”

“The vitamins, you already knew there was something wrong with them, right?” Kyungsoo stops mid stairs, looking right into his eyes. “Baekhyun, are you the spy?”

“No, of course I’m not.” Baekhyun keeps walking, ignoring Kyungsoo’s challenging tone. Well, he is telling the truth after all. “I just suspected something about them already, okay? But I swear I’m not the spy.”

Kyungsoo doesn’t seem convinced, but he knows there is no way he’s gonna get any answers from Baekhyun, so he eventually stops making questions.

“Ok fine, lie to me all you want,” Kyungsoo groans, starting to walk again. “But I’m not an idiot, I know something’s up.”

Baekhyun doesn’t talk to him until they arrive at the canteen.

Not even a day later the Museum is already investigating the article, trying to find out who the mysterious writer is. They’re going to file a lawsuit for defamation against _The Lion Heart_ and force them to take down that article. They’ll probably get it censored in a few days, but now the damage is already done. Everyone here has read the article, it’s quite the topic of discussion these days, probably everyone outside the Museum has read it too. Artpieces talk about it all the time during meals, often speculating and accusing each other of being the infamous spy, and Baekhyun is no exception. Considering that he and Chanyeol were probably the only two Artpieces who already knew about this they, for sure, discussed it a lot. Who could it be, and why would they do it?

Baekhyun often goes into Chanyeol’s room after everyone has fallen asleep, they sit face to face on the bed and they talk for hours, playing detectives all night.

“It’s really strange, isn’t it?” Baekhyun says. “First Yixing tells us everything, and not even a month later an article is already out. Maybe it’s only a coincidence, or maybe something’s up.”

“Well, who could it be then?” Chanyeol asks, while Baekhyun is already making theories in his head. “I mean, who else knows about the vitamins, except you and me?”

Baekhyun excludes Kyungsoo right away. Baekhyun told him to stop taking the pills, but he didn’t mention the whole truth. Also Kyungsoo confronted him right away about it, and that’s not a very spy-like behaviour. So there’s no way he could have known about this.

“What about Doctor Zhang, then?” Chanyeol suggests at one point. “I mean, he’s the one that told us everything in the beginning, after all…”

“No, Yixing would never do this,” Baekhyun quickly remarks. “The Museum pays him too well, and he wouldn’t risk losing his job over something as hazardous as this. But someone else from the infirmary could have known too. Or the managers, probably.”

“But then again, why would they risk losing their job and probably get a lawsuit for defamation on their criminal record? Because they have high morals? I find it very unlikely…”

In the end they don’t reach any conclusion: there are too many people working in this place, and they can’t be sure about who could have and could have not known about this. There are too many possibilities, other than the fact that there is a large window in Yixing’s office and someone might have eavesdropped their conversation about the pills a month ago. Yet, the highest probability is that it’s someone from inside the Museum.

“Who else then?” Chanyeol asks again, since they haven’t made any progress whatsoever. “Who else is important enough here, but has nothing to lose?”

Baekhyun thinks about it for a moment, when suddenly, an idea pops into his head.

“Maybe it’s Jungsoo.”

He hasn’t forgotten what happened a few months ago, when Jungsoo approached him in the canteen and made him that strange offer. That possibly can’t be a coincidence.

“Park Jungsoo?” Chanyeol says, surprised. “You mean the Head of Department?”

“Yeah, I know it’s silly but…” The more Baekhyun talks the more it looks like a plausible theory. “He often works side by side with the Director and a few months ago he also asked me if I wanted to work as a spy for him. I refused right away because I thought he just wanted to know if any Artpiece was misbehaving, but what if he was actually asking me because he wanted to know as many secrets as possible and then reveal everything to the general public? Maybe he’s trying to take revenge…”

“Revenge for what?” Chanyeol grimaces, confused. “I thought he loved working for the Museum…?”

Baekhyun stops, staring at him. He doesn’t know if he’s ready to do it, but maybe this is the right time. He can’t keep secrets from him forever.

“Chanyeol, I think it’s time that I tell you my secret.”

Chanyeol is a little startled for a moment, but he eventually sits straight and nods. They sit in front of each other on the bed with their legs crossed, looking into each other’s eyes, and when he’s finally ready, Baekhyun starts to speak.

“You know how to become an Artpiece here you have to audition before you’re twenty, and then sign a contract that lasts twelve years, right? Well, that didn’t happen for me.”

Chanyeol doesn’t say anything, he just tilts his head confused. Baekhyun takes a deep breath and continues:

“What happened to me is that… the Museum has a secret project, that no one is allowed to talk about,” he tells him, trying to make the explanation as clear as possible. “It happens every ten years or so, I actually don’t know the details but… What they do is that they choose an Artpiece from the Women’s Department and one from the Men’s one, and they make them have a child.”

He says everything practically in one breath. Chanyeol is listening to him in silence, totally speechless.

“I don’t know what’s the criteria they use to choose the parents, but my guess is that they might give them something in exchange, just like you did with your deal with the Director. They make the parents sign a contract that will expire only when the child turns thirty. That child then lives inside the Museum with his mother, and during the day when she’s at work, they train him from the earliest years with the best teachers that they can find, until he’s almost perfect at everything he does. And when that child turns eighteen, they officially present him as an Artpiece and the star of the Museum.”

Silence falls once Baekhyun stops talking. Chanyeol observes him for a moment, he obviously doesn’t know what to say. He looks displeased, a little shocked, and maybe a little angry.

“Is this what happened to you?” Chanyeol quietly whispers, after minutes of silence. “That’s why you don’t know Seoul very well even though you were born here? Because you literally spend all of your life inside here? Your parents were Artpieces too?”

Baekhyun nods. Telling this to someone was the hardest thing he’s ever done. He wasn’t allowed to tell anyone about this, but after all he didn’t have anyone he trusted this much. But he still constantly felt this unbearable burden inside himself and _oh_ , how many times he just wanted to speak to someone about it and get it off once and for all. He never told anyone because he was too scared, of their reactions, of being judged. But he isn’t scared anymore when he’s with Chanyeol.

“What the fuck,” Chanyeol rumbles. He has never sounded angrier then right now. “This is so sick, it’s… disgusting. How many other people did they do this to?”

“Not many, I think, it’s obviously a very risky thing. If the general public would ever know they would probably have to close down the Museum. I don’t know very much about the Women’s Department honestly, but in here, I know only about another person that went through the same project as me.”

 _Park Jungsoo,_ he wants to add, but he doesn’t say it out loud. Chanyeol seems to understand even without words anyway. 

“So that’s why…” he sighs. Baekhyun nods again.

Chanyeol is disgusted, but he still takes Baekhyun’s hand and tightens the hold like he’s afraid he’s gonna slip away.

“Baekhyun, we have to tell someone about it. The Director should be jailed, I swear to god!”

Baekhyun stares at him for a moment. He is overwhelmed by the fact that Chanyeol cares so much about him that he would say something like this. But he doesn’t want him to get mad, someone so beautiful like him shouldn’t waste any energy for this. It’s not worth it.

“Don’t be angry, please.”

“Why _aren’t_ you angry?” Chanyeol screams loudly, without caring that someone from the next room might hear them. He takes a pause to sniffle and only now Baekhyun realizes that he’s fully crying. He’s _actually_ crying for Baekhyun, tears falling down his cheeks like he’s being hurt. “Baekhyun, they literally made you born and raised you all your life just so you could become their servant. Not only, they kept you here all these years, they gave you those disgusting pills and you think I shouldn’t be angry? This is so unfair!”

“It’s because I’m tired of being mad at them,” Baekhyun says softly. “I know it’s not fair, but that’s how it is, and it’s not like I can change history. I don’t have anyone who could help me: my mother left me years ago and there is no one in here that I could ask for. My manager doesn’t care about that, of course, and we still don’t know if we can trust Jungsoo.”

It was hard to accept at first. He used to be really angry, he has been angry with the Museum for over twenty years to the point where he wanted to destroy it, burn it down to ashes, but he has never gained anything from it. Being angry didn’t resolve anything, so all that hate and bitterness slowly turned into weariness, and eventually into apathy.

“I’m probably stuck in here for at least another five years or who knows how long, but I don’t want to resent my past forever,” Baekhyun continues. “I only hope that when or if they’ll let me leave one day, I’ll be lucky enough to finally be able to live a normal life.”

“You’re too kind,” Chanyeol manages to say between sobs. “You didn’t deserve any of this.”

Baekhyun simply smiles at him, because he’s not sure of what else to do. He just wants to hug him right now, so that’s what he does, holding him until he stops crying.

They stay hugged like this for a long time. Baekhyun lets Chanyeol cry in silence.

The Museum stays closed for three whole days, trying to take time to recover from the scandal. When it reopens though, it’s like nothing happened. The article gets taken down as soon as the next day, and everyone quickly forgets about it. Nobody comes to further investigate and the story about the pills gets labelled as “pure imagination” by the general public.

One thing that changes, however, is that the Museum stops giving the pills to the Artpieces, finding it too risky for their reputation at this point.

The days go by slowly, tediously and every morning it’s just the same as before. The watches, the food, the glass case, the visitors, the art students sitting on the ground, tracing lines on their messy sketchbooks. Junmyeon doesn’t knock at their doors anymore to give them the vitamins. Baekhyun’s mornings kinda feel lonelier like this.

Ever since that night with Chanyeol, Baekhyun has been feeling a little weird. He feels this constant pain in his chest, whenever he thinks about Chanyeol. Actually maybe it started way before that. After he’s stopped taking those pills. He cries more than usual, even the tiniest thing makes him emotional. He’s so scared about all of the implications, about what all of this could mean and he doesn’t know what to do.

All he thinks about is him. Chanyeol singing for him, Chanyeol’s beautiful laugh, Chanyeol's face under the cherry blossom, Chanyeol crying in his room, Chanyeol comforting him and holding his hand, Chanyeol, Chanyeol, Chanyeol-

Baekhyun tries to tone it down, too afraid that someone could notice. He tries to avoid Chanyeol as much as possible. Even when they’re not together though, he can only think about him.

Weeks pass and Baekhyun keeps avoiding him. Nothing changes, he goes on with his life and his work, his songs and performances, and no one seems to notice any difference. That, until Chanyeol is the one that gets angry with him.

Baekhyun is eating dinner on his own one night. He’s been avoiding everyone lately, Kyungsoo and Jongin included. When he gets up to leave, Chanyeol strangely follows him. Baekhyun pretends he isn’t seeing him, accelerating when he gets upstairs, but Chanyeol still follows behind. When Baekhyun arrives at the door of his room and tries to enter, Chanyeol rushes towards him, sneaking inside before the door closes again. Baekhyun stares at him agape.

“What are you doing here?” he shrieks, while trying to get to the door and kick him out. Chanyeol however, stands in front of him so Baekhyun cannot even approach it.

“Why are you avoiding me?” Chanyeol asks, ignoring the question.

So _that’s_ what he came here to do. Baekhyun shrugs, pretending to be oblivious.

“I’m not.”

“Are you serious?” Chanyeol scoffs and Baekhyun automatically looks down. He doesn’t want to look him in the eyes right now. “When was the last time we talked, Baekhyun? Like one week ago?”

“Look, I have a life outside of you.” Baekhyun replies dryly. “I don’t have to be with you all the time, okay? I’m sorry it’s been a week, now get over it.”

Baekhyun lies to him. He has lied many times, to a lot of different people, but he never cared about them like he cares about him. That’s why this time it hurts so much, like he’s being stabbed repeatedly, because he can see, through Chanyeol’s eyes, that his words are hurting him too.

“Why are you doing this to me?” Chanyeol whispers, and just from his voice Baekhyun understands how upset he is. “Did I do something wrong?”

Every time Chanyeol speaks, Baekhyun feels like a billion needles are being embedded in his heart, like there’s an open wound inside his chest that’s bleeding everywhere, on his clothes, on his floor, on his carpet, on his bed sheets. He hates that he’s making Chanyeol feel like this, and he hates himself for making him feel like he’s the one responsible for this. He takes a deep breath.

“No, no, you…” he exhales, feeling like he’s choking again. “I’m sorry, I just had to think.”

“Baekhyun, please, stop ignoring me.” Chanyeol pleads. He sounds desperate, heartbroken and it’s destroying Baekhyun little by little. “It’s… it’s killing me.”

Baekhyun doesn’t say anything, only keeps staring at the floor. There’s a war going on inside him and it’s confusing him. A thousand voices are screaming over each other inside his head. I want you to leave. I don’t want you to leave. I want you to go, no, I want you to stay. I want you to hug me, hold me, touch me, kiss me, break me, hurt me, please me, _please, please, please-_

“Please, i-if I did anything to make you uncomfortable, then just tell me so I can-”

“No, it’s not your fault!” Baekhyun interrupts him, not resisting anymore. “It’s not you, it’s me, I… I think it’s better if I stay away from you for a little while, okay?”

“But why?” Chanyeol tries to take his hand, but Baekhyun pulls it away, still avoiding his gaze. This makes Chanyeol sound even more desperate when he speaks again. “Don’t lie to me, please, I’m begging you! Tell me what’s bothering you, I’m not leaving until you tell me!”

Baekhyun cannot take it anymore. He’s trying to fight these feelings so hard and it’s hurting him. The pain is so unbearable that he’s afraid he’s going to break down soon. With shining eyes, he finally takes the courage to look at Chanyeol, and he sees it all, all the pain reflecting his, all this torment that’s been making his chest hurt so much for the past weeks.

“I think you know why,” Baekhyun murmurs, choking on his words again. “I am just… so scared, Chanyeol. I’m so scared about so many things.”

Chanyeol looks at him and Baekhyun just knows it. He knows he understands, he knows he can feel it too.

“Do you have… this kind of feelings too?” Chanyeol tries to get closer, and when he touches his arm, Baekhyun gasps, and he takes a few steps back. “Are these feelings what scares you?”

“I have tried to control them. These feelings, feelings I have… for you.” he falters, fighting the tears. “But they keep coming back and I just... don't know what to do. I think I’m going insane.”

Baekhyun feels the grip of Chanyeol’s hand on his arm, and he knows that’s the moment when he has to leave. He tries to get to the door but Chanyeol keeps blocking the way to the point where it’s infuriating. Baekhyun keeps trying, but Chanyeol always pulls him back. Unfortunately, he’s much stronger then Baekhyun.

“Please, can you let me go?” he whispers, not sounding convincing in the slightest.

“Baekhyun, please, don’t go back to ignoring me, just talk to me-” Chanyeol begs again, holding his shoulder and keeping him in place.

“Let me go.” Baekhyun knows he sounds ridiculous when he’s not even trying to resist.

“Why? Why are you ignoring this?” Chanyeol shouts in his face, now on the verge of tears. “You’re not insane, you don’t have to control any feelings!”

Baekhyun closes his eyes and sighs.

“Please just let me go-”

Baekhyun gets suddenly interrupted when a pair of cold lips harshly press against his. He feels two hands holding his neck, and only when he opens his eyes he realizes that Chanyeol is kissing him. He’s kissing him and it feels so good, like those nicotine drags he used to smoke at down, he just can’t get enough, he keeps wanting more and more and more. He closes his eyes again and he feels like crying, when he realizes the pain in his chest is suddenly gone.

He wants more, but everything ends too quickly. Chanyeol breaks the kiss only after a few seconds and Baekhyun is just too stunned to say anything. They stare at each other, breathing heavily, both startled and speechless.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.” is the last thing that Chanyeol whispers to him before rushing outside of the door.

Baekhyun is left alone in the middle of his dark room, with his heart beating like crazy.

He brings a hand to his mouth, gently tracing the lips with his fingers, the last traces of the kiss still present on them.

It was his first kiss. He always dreamed about what kisses could feel like, whenever he read about it in books, he always wondered if he would ever have a first one. It was a hopeless dream, he knew it, but he still wanted to try it, he longed for them, he fantasized about kissing a person that he loved and cared about.

He's happy that Chanyeol was his first kiss. There’s no one else he would have wanted it to be.

Baekhyun hears the people outside, cheering loudly. There must be a party tonight in Yeouido Park. Someone has their radio on and he can hear music in the distance.

He stands up from his bed, going right in front of the window and looks up, at the pitch black sky. Because of the pollution there are no stars, and the moon is shining, looking so lonely up there, without anything to keep it company.

Baekhyun tonight feels as lonely as the moon. He has always felt lonely, ever since his mother left more than ten years ago, and there was nobody else, not even Kyungsoo, that could fill that huge hole she left. That, up until Chanyeol barged into his life, like a chaotic, beautiful firework, he couldn’t think he could trust anyone again.

Baekhyun goes in front of the window, he waits for a few seconds and then he sees them. Fireworks, suddenly appearing in the sky. They explode one by one, illuminating his room in red, yellow, blue, sparkling colours everywhere. 

He stays there at the window, admiring them with a large smile on his lips. He’s a child again, he’s sitting on the grass with his mother and they’re admiring the fireworks together. That was the happiest moment of his life. Why has he never felt happy since then?

While the fireworks are still going on he looks at his surroundings: his big room, a place that always made him feel comfortable and safe, now it only feels empty and scarce. Why waste all of this space just for one person anyway?

Baekhyun doesn’t want to be lonely anymore. He doesn’t want to keep on living his life, where everything repeats, always the same, and nothing brings him happiness anymore.

The fireworks are still exploding in the night sky, the people are still cheering, but Baekhyun doesn’t care anymore.

He quickly closes the window, and rushes outside of his room. The hallway is completely quiet, and when he arrives in front of Chanyeol’s room, he knocks very quietly, trying not to make a sound.

Chanyeol opens only after a few seconds. When he realizes that Baekhyun is the one that knocked, he looks a little uneasy.

“Hey,” Baekhyun says right away. “Can I come in? I want to talk to you, if that’s okay.”

Chanyeol, seems unsure for a moment, but he eventually agrees with a softly whispered “alright,” and lets Baekhyun into his room.

Chanyeol’s room looks exactly like Kyungsoo’s one, about half the size of Baekhyun’s one, with grey walls and a single window that faces on the back entrance, with cheap looking curtains on it. It looks kind of small and bland, compared to what Baekhyun is used to in his majestic room.

Chanyeol sits on his bed, avoiding Baekhyun’s gaze. He looks ashamed.

“I’m so sorry about what happened before,” he says, in such a low voice that Baekhyun has difficulties hearing him at first.

“No, don’t be.” Baekhyun comes closer, sitting on the bed as well, but still maintaining a few meters between them. “It was… very special.”

Chanyeol doesn’t speak, he just hugs his legs, making himself impossibly tiny.

“Are you sure it’s okay?” he asks timidly.

Baekhyun smiles at him.

“Yes, of course” he says, sitting cross-legged on the bed, so he can face Chanyeol better. “I’ve thought about it a lot, and while I was there, alone in my room, I realized something very important.”

Chanyeol sits there in silence, looking so small and so dreary. Baekhyun wants to come closer and hug him so bad.

“You know, I never really had a choice in my life,” he continues, lowering his voice until it’s barely a murmur. “Everything was chosen by other people for me: what my profession should be, where I have to live, what I have to wear, what I have to eat, who I have to trust. I’ve never been in control of anything. You could say I wasn’t living my life, I was just being lived by it.”

Baekhyun is too tired of many things: he’s tired of his work, of the visitors and the glass case, he’s tired of performing, he’s tired of acting perfect, but most of all, he’s tired of waiting. He is baring himself right now, as a mass of broken pieces that need to be fixed together. But he can’t wait for someone to save him, he needs to do it himself.

“But I’m tired of not having a choice. I want to be in control for once. I want to take this decision by myself, because this time I’m sure I won’t regret it.”

Baekhyun isn’t a child anymore. He isn’t a boy either, he is a young man that lost control of his life too long ago and he doesn’t know how to find it again. He isn’t a kid, and he knows now more than ever what he wants. And he doesn’t care if it’s risky, impossible, infeasible, or a waste of energy. He’s exhausted, he just wants to be in control again. This is his life, it’s not theirs. Baekhyun should be the one in control, not the Museum, not the Director.

Chanyeol finally looks at him, seemingly not scared anymore.

“Chanyeol, I have too many things going on in my head and I don’t understand a single one of them,” Baekhyun says, now totally lost in his eyes. “Everything is just so confusing, but I know one thing for sure: I’m tired of having people telling me what I can and can’t do, what my desires should and shouldn’t be. For once in my life, I know exactly what I want.” He takes a deep breath, finding the courage to pronounce the next words. “And that’s you.”

Chanyeol suddenly smiles, coming closer to him.

“Me too. I’ve felt like this for a while, I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t want to scare you,” he exhales. “But if that’s what you feel, then I can say it too: I want you too. So, so bad.”

Baekhyun beams at him, because those words feel like they’re part of a dream, something that he never thought he was worthy of hearing. He’s been lonely all of his life, and he never thought there could be anyone willing to accept him, accept his flaws, his struggles and traumas, because he’s such a broken person and he has nothing to give in return. He has nothing except his trust, and Chanyeol has already gained it all a long time ago.

He comes closer slowly, a little unsurely. Then their breaths meet, then their noses touch lightly. Baekhyun holds his breath like he’s under water, and when he closes his eyes, finally Chanyeol puts his lips against his. Baekhyun is trying hard to relax and to sit straight: he’s shaking, he feels so nervous that he’s afraid of collapsing at any moment. Their lips barely touch each other at first. Chanyeol kisses him gently, little by little, as if he’s afraid to scare Baekhyun.

It’s incredible. Chanyeol kisses like a maven. Surely he has had a lot more experience than Baekhyun with kisses, it’s obvious. He probably thinks Baekhyun is crap at kissing.

When Chanyeol breaks the kiss and leans back to watch Baekhyun’s reaction, he finds him still shaking, lips trembling and panting. Chanyeol cups his cheek with one hand and Baekhyun instantly flinches, but Chanyeol doesn’t back out.

“Beautiful,” is the only thing he murmurs. Not a scold, not a request, just “ _beautiful_ ”. And just like a magic spell, Baekhyun feels safe under his touch. Chanyeol leans in again, and this time Baekhyun doesn’t feel nervous anymore.

They kiss again and enjoy every second that passes, locked up in their personal time capsule. Time stops, and they are there, clinging to each other, kissing, without caring about anything else in the world.

“I’m sorry,” Baekhyun breathes between kisses, directly on Chanyeol’s lips. “I know I’m really bad at this.”

“What are you talking about?” Chanyeol kisses him again and Baekhyun melts against his lips. It’s addicting, the way these kisses are making him feel, like he doesn't want to separate his mouth from Chanyeol’s, ever again. “I adore it.” Another kiss, then another one, they breathe in unison, eyes closed, hearts beating fast. “I adore you.”

Baekhyun can’t get enough of his lips. He keeps kissing them, and just keeps wanting more. He’s merging with them, he wants to live attached to them.

“Don’t lie to me. I’m sure I’m not exactly what you wanted.”

Chanyeol suddenly giggles, then kisses his jaw, before going down to leave kisses all over his neck.

“Are you kidding?” Chanyeol chuckles against his skin. “You’re the man of my dreams. So handsome, so beautiful and perfect.”

Upon hearing that word, Baekhyun suddenly stiffens. The magic spell breaks and he doesn’t feel safe anymore. He pushes Chanyeol away, trying to get him off his neck.

“Okay. Stop it now,” he says, slipping away from his hands, so he can sit alone on the other side of the bed.

“Wait, what’s wrong?” Chanyeol says, rightfully confused.

“Nothing.” Baekhyun starts playing with his own fingers, avoiding Chanyeol’s gaze. “I just… I don’t know, I didn’t like it.”

“Did I make you uncomfortable or-?”

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong, it’s not that.”

He knows he’s difficult to get along with, because he doesn’t know how to communicate properly. Baekhyun knows he is a lame person that doesn’t deserve someone like Chanyeol, but god, how he wishes he could be just like him and be able to tell everything he feels. _I don’t want you to think that I’m perfect, because I’m not, and the sooner you’ll realize the sooner you’ll be disappointed_. He just sits there in silence, alone in the dark corner of the bed.

“You know, I was so happy when you told me that you wanted to be with me,” Chanyeol tells him, scooting a little closer. “And I want that too, I really do.”

A beat. Chanyeol is now at his side, but Baekhyun doesn’t dare to look at him.

“But honey, you need to tell me if something is bothering you, otherwise I cannot fix it.”

Baekhyun takes a deep breath. He feels uncomfortable sharing this, but this time he wants to make an effort, for himself, for Chanyeol, because he wants to be worthy of someone like him, for once in his life.

“I don’t-” Baekhyun says, stumbling on his words. “I don’t want you to like me only because you think I’m attractive.”

Baekhyun doesn’t want to be afraid anymore. He wants to be Chanyeol’s equal this time, so he peers at him, and Chanyeol is there, sitting in front of him. He understands from the way he’s looking at him that he’s not judging, he’s simply listening.

“But I don’t.” Chanyeol comes closer. He puts his hand over Baekhyun’s, he strokes it with his thumb. “I mean, I do find you attractive, but that’s not the only thing I like about you, of course.”

Baekhyun just stays silent, watching their jointed hands resting on the bed sheets. It’s such a wonderful sight.

“You know, love isn’t about owning or belonging to someone,” Chanyeol tells him, tightening the hold. “It’s about trusting and respecting, otherwise it’s not love, it’s just selfishness. And love can’t be selfish.”

They don’t speak for a while, until Chanyeol takes a deep breath and speaks again:

“Baekhyun, you’re such an amazing person, and there’s way more in you than just the Starchild everyone sees.”

“You too. You’re an amazing person too,” Baekhyun whispers. He is so happy right now he feels like crying. “But I’m a mess, and sometimes I just feel like I don’t deserve you.”

Chanyeol looks at him like he’s about to laugh, opening his arms wide.

“Come here, silly.”

Baekhyun doesn’t hesitate for a moment. In a quick second, he falls over Chanyeol chest, hugging his waist tightly. He snuggles closer, taking shelter inside Chanyeol’s arms. He exhales, hides his face completely against his shirt, and he feels like nothing bad could ever happen to him as long as Chanyeol keeps holding him like this.

“Please stop saying that,” Chanyeol says, before kissing the top of his head. “You deserve the entire world.”

Baekhyun breathes in and out, savouring the moment.

For a moment he feels like he’s actually worthy of everything.

After Chanyeol has fallen asleep in his bed, Baekhyun decides to take a shower. He pushes Chanyeol’s bangs back and leaves a soft peck on his forehead, before going into the bathroom.

Still a little excited about what happened, he takes off his clothes and enters the shower cubicle, immediately enjoying the way the warm water is falling over his head and shoulder.

What just happened is amazing, he still cannot believe it. He smiles against the damp glass, the feeling of those kisses still haunting his mind. Chanyeol has such nice lips, plump, pink and perfect, kissing them was like a holy experience. He finds himself getting a little aroused.

He looks around. There is nobody here with him. He can do anything he wants.

He wraps a hand around his naked cock, trying to move it a little. He doesn’t know what he’s doing, he has never done it before. Hell, he didn’t even think about doing this before Chanyeol came into his life. Maybe it was because of the pills. It probably was. But those kisses destroyed him, he can’t stop to think about them.

His hand gets faster, faster, and his mind keeps wandering around.

Chanyeol’s mouth on his neck, Chanyeol licking his skin, Chanyeol touching him, making him scream.

It gets faster, and faster. He doesn’t know how to think straight anymore.

He keeps stroking his member until he forgets where he is, until the world around him disappears altogether. The only thing he thinks about is Chanyeol, Chanyeol and his beautiful pink lips wrapped around him, sucking and slurping so filthily he gets spit everywhere. Faster, faster. Chanyeol’s lips, his warm mouth and his wet tongue, all over him, kissing him, sucking him, touching him, only Chanyeol, just Chanyeol, forever _Chanyeol_ -

The euphoria gets the best of him, and Baekhyun tries his best to stay quiet, in order not to wake someone up, but the feeling is so strong he has to bite on his lip to choke down the moans.

He slumps against the shower glass doors, trying to catch his breath. Only when he looks down he realizes what just happened.

 _Dammit_. He just jerked off while thinking about Chanyeol.

A sudden knock on the door startles him.

“Hey, is everything alright?” he hears Chanyeol’s muffled voice, talking from the other side of the door.

“Ah, yes!” _god_ , this is so embarrassing. “Uhm sorry, I just… I just hurt my toe.”

“Oh… okay.”

Chanyeol apparently leaves after that, and Baekhyun is left only with the company of the sound of the water. He laughs a little, he feels so good right now. He quickly washes his hands and continues to shower, pretending like nothing just happened.

They find out that having a secret relationship inside the Museum isn’t that hard after all. They are both responsible of course, so they don’t act differently when they’re in public, toning it down to some stolen glances and maybe some quick touches whenever they get the chance. When they finish work however, Baekhyun often sneaks inside Chanyeol’s room when no one is around late at night, and they kiss for hours until they’re both dizzy, lying on the bed, telling each other about their day. Baekhyun adores it, he just wishes he could have more time to spend with him. He could spend hours telling him everything, even the most mundane things, and he could spend hours listening to Chanyeol talking about nothing.

It goes on like this for a few weeks, they go out together when they’re both free, and on every Saturday they meet right before their performances. It doesn’t matter if they have limited time, they always want to be together.

“So, a little birdie told me that it’s your birthday on the 6th,” Chanyeol tells him one Saturday, when they’re both dressed up and ready for their performances, hiding backstage, away from everyone.

“Is that birdie called Do Kyungsoo, perhaps?” Baekhyun chuckles.

There is another Artpiece singing on stage right now. Baekhyun doesn’t know his name, but he has such a nice voice, so calm and soothing.

“Maybe.” Chanyeol comes closer, until his mouth is right next to his ear. “So, what do you want for your birthday, my prince?”

“Nothing, it’s okay.” Baekhyun shrugs, “I don’t know, I don’t usually celebrate birthdays.”

Nobody here even knows when his birthday is, except for Kyungsoo and Boa, who are also the only people that wish him a happy birthday every year.

But other than the quick “happy birthday” from them, Baekhyun spends all of his birthdays just like any other day, working, sitting inside the glass case.

“But I want to give you a present!” Chanyeol insists, now taking his hand and holding it. “How about we ask for a permit and we spend all of the day outside together, mh?”

Baekhyun stares at him. He looks really handsome with his messy hair and a little makeup on his eyelids.

“I’d really like that, actually.”

“A whole day just for ourselves,” Chanyeol says, holding Baekhyun’s hand between both of his. “We can do so many things you’ve never done before, and I want to make it unforgettable for you.”

Baekhyun thinks about it for a moment. He never did anything special for his birthday, but maybe it’s time to start a tradition.

“Okay, that sounds really cool,” he whispers. “I know I don’t sound excited, but I really am, I swear.”

The Artpiece on stage finishes his song and bows to the public, and they keep clapping. His name is Kim Jongdae, he says into the microphone. Baekhyun looks at him impressed, what a pity that they never spoke to each other.

“I have to go on stage now,” Chanyeol says, while the audience outside is still clapping. “I’ll see you later.”

Chanyeol looks around to be sure that there is no one who could possibly see them. He gives Baekhyun a quick peck on the cheek and then walks away. Baekhyun doesn’t let go of his hand until he’s literally too far to reach.

“In your room at midnight?” Baekhyun asks with a smirk.

Chanyeol doesn’t say anything, but he winks at him before eventually disappearing somewhere backstage.

Baekhyun spends all of his time counting the days left before his birthday, feeling so excited about the idea of spending an entire day outside with Chanyeol.

They accept both of their requests for a 24 hours permit in just a couple of days. Chanyeol uses a lame excuse like his sister being sick, while Baekhyun’s one gets accepted because he has literally never asked for one in his entire life.

When the 5th of May actually arrives, Baekhyun almost feels like crying for happiness.

They are together even at midnight, when Baekhyun’s birthday officially starts. They’re sitting in front of each other on Chanyeol’s bed, and they don’t have a cake or candles of course, but Baekhyun is still happy to celebrate his twenty-five years with a soft kiss on his lips.

He’s so excited he can’t even sleep properly, and when he does eventually fall asleep, he only dreams about Chanyeol.

The next day they meet for breakfast, and once they’ve finished eating, the security lets them both go. They pass their watches on the panel on the main entrance, and the glass door magically opens in front of them.

It’s a warm sunny day, as they walk down the flight of steps in front of the Museum’s entrance, and Baekhyun literally can’t stop smiling. Once they are far enough from the Museum’s entrance, Chanyeol takes his hand and asks him “So, what do you want to do today?”

“I don’t know,” Baekhyun answers, trying to hold his excitement. “Let’s do whatever we want.”

And they do, they go around the city, travelling all day, enjoying all sorts of things. They buy some cheap ice cream, which Baekhyun had never eaten before, they take a walk along the river, and they even stop to talk to two nice girls in pink skirts, who were obviously trying to flirt with them.

Baekhyun is now an expert in subway maps, so he can choose to go wherever he likes.

He decides he should visit the Seoul Tower at least once in his life. They walk all the way up there, making a bet on who will be the most exhausted when they’ll arrive. Baekhyun wins.

When they arrive on top of Namsan Mountain, they don’t say anything, they just stay in silence admiring the city, with the golden sunshine hitting the roofs of the houses and the mountains on the panorama strangely looking so close to them.

Chanyeol looks so beautiful with the sun on his face. Baekhyun knows they can’t kiss in public (someone linked to the Museum might see them) but he would love to do it right now. Somewhere in an alternative universe, where People’s Museums don’t exist and they’re just two people living a normal life, there are a Baekhyun and a Chanyeol kissing, up there in the sky, without shame, in front of the whole Seoul.

After hours of wandering around, they somehow end up in Ichon Riverside Park, they lay on the grass with their hoods on to cover their faces, and they lazily kiss for hours while they watch the sun setting on the river.

“What are you thinking about?” Chanyeol asks him at one point, while Baekhyun is resting on his chest.

“You.” Is the simplest, most obvious answer.

It’s a calm and quiet moment. And Baekhyun almost forgets about the Museum and his countless fears, because he feels so good as he looks into Chanyeol’s beautiful eyes. He suddenly realizes he doesn't care at all about the sun or the thousand stars in the sky, or the lights of Seoul’s houses, because in that moment Chanyeol is the brightest thing he's ever seen.

“We still have all evening,” Baekhyun says with a smirk on his lips. “What should we do now?”

“Do you want to go watch a movie?” Chanyeol suggests.

“Sure.”

They somehow find a close cinema just with the indications of some random passers. Baekhyun has never been to a cinema, he honestly doesn’t know what to expect. They arrive there totally unprepared, when most of the movies have already started, so they buy tickets for the only one still available.

When they enter, the movie hall is completely empty. They’re the only audience, and even when the movie starts, no one else enters the hall. It’s better like this, they both think, it’s more intimate, like it’s their personal private show, and at least they can choose the best seats right in the centre.

For the first half they actually pay attention to the movie. It’s a lovely story, about a poor family finding happiness during the war, and although it’s a recent movie, it’s all shot in black and white. It adds a special beauty to it. In the second half the mother of the family dies and the story gets a little boring, so Baekhyun notices that Chanyeol isn’t paying attention to the screen anymore, instead he keeps playing with Baekhyun’s pink strands.

Baekhyun turns around and their faces are so close. They are still completely alone in the hall, so there’s no need to hold back. He leans closer and their lips meet, while a dramatic scene is playing on the screen.

It’s soft at first, their lips are barely moving, but it quickly turns more heated. Chanyeol wraps an arm around his shoulders and pulls him closer, Baekhyun welcomes it and moans softly against his lips. They keep kissing in the dark for the whole duration of the movie, completely disregarding the screen in front of them.

Baekhyun puts a hand in Chanyeol’s hair and the way he hears him groan when he grips softly is making him go crazy. He knows he’s getting hard, he feels the erection in his pants getting uncomfortable with every second passing.

The way Chanyeol is kissing him truly has some effect on him.

Baekhyun whimpers when Chanyeol suddenly puts a hand between his thighs and strokes him, but he doesn’t complain. He feels a little awkward, considering that they’re technically in a public place, even though there is no one there with them. He touches him, he feels the erection with his hand.

“Do you want me to do something about it?” Chanyeol murmurs in the shell of his ear.

“Yes,” Baekhyun moans, quickly checking his surroundings. “But not here.”

He stands up from his seat while the movie is still playing, almost at its end. He takes Chanyeol’s hand and they quietly get out of the hall, leaving the story of the poor family behind.

They get inside the public restroom right outside the hall and not even a second pass till they’re already kissing, making out fervently with their mouths open, tasting their tongues, pressing their bodies together until there is not even an inch between them. 

It’s like they can’t control themselves, not anymore.

“Do you trust me?” Chanyeol breathes against his lips.

“Always.”

Chanyeol pushes him forward, pressing him against the door. He quickly kneels down, Baekhyun looks at him completely breathless.

Chanyeol undoes the zip of his pants and starts leaving open-mouth kisses all over his pelvis. Baekhyun doesn’t know what is happening to him. He doesn’t want him to stop, ever, he wants him to go deeper, to suck him and please him until he’s nothing else but a moaning mess.

Somehow Chanyeol understands what he’s thinking about: he smirks, fingers lingering along the side of the hem of Baekhyun’s underwear.

“Chanyeol, what are you-“

“Shh, don’t worry,” Chanyeol whispers, breathing hard against his crotch. It makes Baekhyun shiver. “I promise I’ll make you feel really good.”

His hands are cold, on his member, when he takes it out. It’s hovering against Baekhyun’s stomach, so red and hard it’s actually hurting him. Chanyeol licks feverishly around its head and it suddenly makes Baekhyun moan.

“Chanyeol- _ah_!”

Suddenly a pair of lips wrap around his cock and Baekhyun moans loudly, feeling the pleasure instantly surging. He looks down, seeing Chanyeol sucking him with such eagerness, and is such a gorgeous sight. Baekhyun watches everything, the way his lips wrap around his cock, the way he keeps pushing deeper, without breaking their eye contact. He looks so beautiful on his knees like this, Baekhyun can’t take his eyes away.

Chanyeol keeps looking at him and Baekhyun almost wants to tell him to stop, because he’s sure he won’t resist much longer if he keeps doing it.

When Baekhyun whimpers, he quickly puts a hand over his mouth, in hope that no one would hear him. Chanyeol goes down on him, and Baekhyun can’t help but grab his dark locks and push him deeper. Chanyeol doesn’t seem to mind though, as Baekhyun hears him moan against his dick.

The slurping sounds are filthy, they fill the whole restroom and Baekhyun adores everything about it. He keeps wanting more, _more,_ he never wants him to stop.

“Chanyeol, fuck, how are you so good at this?” He moans louder, when Chanyeol starts licking his head, throwing his head backwards. He hits the wall behind him, but this doesn’t stop him for the pleasure he’s feeling.

The way Chanyeol keeps bobbing his head up and down, the way he closes his eyes in concentration and moans around him, it’s making him go insane.

It’s a brew of overwhelming feelings, when he comes uncontrollably into Chanyeol’s mouth.

He’s panting hard, trying to catch his breath. 

He can’t believe they just did this in a public restroom. It should embarrass him, makes him feel filthy and dirty, but it only made him feel good, a little aroused, maybe. Chanyeol didn’t break his promise after all.

After a few seconds, Chanyeol finally stands up, spits everything into one of the sinks and quickly washes his mouth with water. Baekhyun is still a little breathless and can’t move properly.

When Chanyeol looks at him, he’s grinning.

“Hope you liked your birthday present,” he says.

At midnight, when Baekhyun’s twenty-fifth birthday is officially over, they are in the streets, laughing together and eating some low quality _hoppang_ they bought in a convenience store. When they realize it’s midnight, Chanyeol pulls him in a quiet alley, and pushes him against the wall.

“Happy birthday,” he whispers, before gently kissing Baekhyun’s lips.

The motel room is squalid. There are some strange dark stains on the bed sheets and everything, from the walls to the furniture, smells like smoke. It is far from the luxury of his room that Baekhyun is used to, but he has never felt happier than this moment.

They’re sitting cross-legged on the bed, Chanyeol has bought a bottle of beer for himself and a package of cigarettes for Baekhyun. The cigarettes are horrible, they taste nothing like the ones Kyungsoo buys, but Baekhyun takes it all in, loving the taste of nicotine in his mouth. They don’t even open the window, for once in his life there is no one checking him.

He watches Chanyeol taking sips from the bottle, admiring how his lips wrap around it. It reminds him of what happened before in the cinema’s restroom and he can’t stop smirking. Somehow Chanyeol understands what he’s thinking about, because he’s looking back at him with the same expression. He also observes attentively whenever Baekhyun brings the cigarette to his lips.

“Was it a good birthday?” Chanyeol asks, after the room is totally filled with smoke.

“The best one.” Baekhyun smiles at him. He pauses to take another drag of the cigarette. “I wish all of my birthdays could be as good.”

“Next year let’s do something even better.” Chanyeol suggests, laying back against the bed header. “Maybe I’ll take you to the sea, and we can have a romantic date on the beach.”

“I would love that.” Baekhyun says. “I’ve never seen the sea.”

There are strange thoughts inside his head, and he doesn’t know how to express them. He wants to push Chanyeol down, bite his lips till they’re red, and then, he wants to make him lose his mind.

Baekhyun finishes the cigarettes and puts it out in the ashtray that’s already on the nightstand

“Chanyeol,” he says, looking intensely into his eyes. “I don’t want to go to sleep already.”

He knows what he wants, and he is able to tell it right away. Baekhyun is quite impressed with his own braveness, actually.

Chanyeol also looks at him. He puts the finished bottle away, leaving it on the same nightstand.

“Me neither.” It’s the final sign that they both know what they want, and that they know they want the same thing.

They both come closer, their lips crashing in an instant. They don’t have time for sweet kisses and cuddles this time. Baekhyun just wants to _feel_ and he wants everything _now_. So he’s the one that opens his lips almost immediately and slides his tongue inside Chanyeol’s mouth. He hears Chanyeol moaning inside the kiss, and that sound alone is enough to make Baekhyun’s whole body shiver. They part for a moment to catch their breath.

“I need to confess something,” Baekhyun murmurs against his lips, snickering a little. “I jerked off in the shower while thinking about you.”

Chanyeol kisses him another time, taking his breath away.

“Well, that’s so sweet,” he coos when their lips part again. “It’s funny, because I did the exact same thing with you.”

That idea of Chanyeol touching himself while thinking about him is so hot in Baekhyun’s mind, that he cannot bear to be apart from his lips one second more, so he leans forwards and kisses Chanyeol again. He wants him, Chanyeol actually wants him. He doesn’t know what’s happening to him, he feels intoxicated and he wants to take control. Baekhyun pushes Chanyeol’s shoulders until he’s pinned down on the bed. He takes a moment to open his eyes and look at him, his lover so beautiful and pleading, already panting hard against his mouth.

They kiss again and this time it’s languid, their bodies are now pressed together, as Baekhyun keeps thrusting against his denim jeans, the friction making both of them moan inside the kiss. He just wants to feel more _,_ and he doesn’t know how to stop. His hand reaches between them, trying to undo Chanyeol’s pants.

“Wait.” Chanyeol stops his hand and takes it away. “Are you really sure about this?”

“ _Yes_.” Baekhyun moans, kissing the side of his neck. “But I need to tell you, I have absolutely zero experience.”

“I know. I don’t mind.” Chanyeol looks at him lovingly, his body displayed all over the sheets. He takes Baekhyun’s hand again, bringing it to his lips to kiss the back of it. “Don’t worry, I’ll show you everything.”

They slowly take their clothes off, while their lips are constantly searching for some skin to kiss. Baekhyun sucks a spot on his neck while Chanyeol undoes his pants, Chanyeol yanks his shirt away and suddenly starts kissing his chest. They continue this game until they’re both completely naked, panting hard against each other’s mouth.

Chanyeol lies on his back, and Baekhyun takes his time to observe him, not feeling ashamed anymore. They are there, completely naked, not holding a secret anymore. The only secret right now is their love, but here they are, sharing this secret together, and it’s such an enthralling experience.

Baekhyun admires his beautiful body, his long skinny legs and his broad shoulders, he even traces a finger down his torso, studying the lines that define his abs.

“Can I just look for a second?” he whispers, even though he’s already doing it.

Chanyeol closes his eyes, taking a deep breath.

“Of course. You can look as much as you like” he replies, and Baekhyun doesn’t waste a second more. He looks at that body and he somehow wants to worship it. So he leans forward, pecking Chanyeol’s lips before going down slowly, kissing his jaw, his neck, taking time to appreciate every centimetre of his skin. He doesn’t want to miss a single spot, he touches, he explores, testing which ones make Chanyeol react the best. He wants to make him feel good, he wants to push him to the point where he’s shouting deliriously.

“When was your first time?” Baekhyun asks him, while his breath is fanning against his skin, as he travels around, trying to kiss every inch of his body.

“When I was seventeen. I had a boyfriend in high school, his name was Oh Sehun and-” His voice suddenly breaks into giggles, when Baekhyun kisses his tummy. “He had such a beautiful ass.”

Baekhyun goes down slowly, kissing all over his stomach, then travels to his navel, before sinking between his legs. He starts sucking a spot on his inner thigh, enjoying the way Chanyeol inhales sharply.

“Have you always been… into men?” Baekhyun asks, stroking Chanyeol’s beautiful long legs.

“Gosh, you’re so adorable,” Chanyeol laughs. “Yes, of course, it’s not like you wake up one day and you start liking men, I just-” he suddenly gasps when Baekhyun gets back to sucking a hickey on his inner thigh. “I actually don’t enjoy sex with women at all. That’s why I’ll always be grateful to you for saving me that night.”

Baekhyun stops. He said _saving me,_ but Baekhyun doesn’t know if he’s actually a saviour. He isn’t sure if he wants to be one, he doesn’t want anyone to feel in debt with him.

“I really like you, you know?” he says.

“Me too.” Chanyeol smiles at him. “So, please, don’t be nervous. It doesn’t have to be perfect, we’re just two people really liking each other having sex for the first time.”

It’s impossible for him to not be nervous, he’s not completely sure of what he’s supposed to do next.

Baekhyun has read many books – yes there are some low-quality gay erotica novels hidden in the back in the Museum’s library that nobody seemed to notice, and Baekhyun read them when there was nothing else interesting to read – but of course, it’s not the same thing.

“Please teach me how to make you feel good,” Baekhyun asks, as a request, as the birthday presents he actually wants.

Chanyeol sits up, and leaves a kiss on Baekhyun’s lips.

“I’ll teach you how to make both of us feel good.”

Chanyeol takes out a condom and a bottle of lube out of his bag, explaining he bought it when he went out to buy the beer and the cigarettes. He lays on his back again, taking some of the lube and pouring it on his hand. Then he pushes two fingers right inside his own rim, whimpering at the intrusion.

Baekhyun stares at him fascinated, studying the movement of his fingers inside him, the way he whines, the way he pushes the other fingers inside his mouth, plastering them with saliva, before starting to stoke his already hard cock. This is art, watching him like this, splayed on the bed, already so wrecked and needy is the only art he wants to look at forever, something that People’s Museums could never understand.

The view is so endearing that Baekhyun cannot take it anymore. He scoots over and asks him to do it for him. Chanyeol agrees instantly, he carefully explains how to do it, pouring the lube on Baekhyun’s fingers and gently guiding them towards his hole. Baekhyun starts with one finger, slowly pushing it inside, willing to study Chanyeol’s reaction.

“How is it?” Baekhyun asks, hoping he’s doing everything the right way.

“Good,” Chanyeol breathes out. “You’re really good at this.”

That encourages him to go on, inserting one finger at time, waiting till he relaxes enough for the next one. He keeps asking Chanyeol how it is, if he’s doing it correctly, and the other keeps reassuring him: “Yes, you are doing good, you’re amazing” and Baekhyun just falls under his spell.

How Chanyeol can look so dishevelled and beautiful at the same time, it will always be a mystery to him.

“You know, I hated having sex with those women so much, sometimes I couldn’t even get hard. They wanted me to be dominant, rough, but I’m not like that,” Chanyeol murmurs, like a soft confession, “and I always had to think about something else when I was with them. There are so many handsome men in our Department, and I’m actually a little embarrassed about how many sexual fantasies I had about them. I made up so many scenarios in my head that sometimes I couldn’t even stop for days. So I had fantasies all the time, sometimes in my sleep, sometimes when I was wide awake. And they all made me go insane.”

Baekhyun stares at him, he inserts a third finger, pushing them deeper. Chanyeol moans again, this time so loud he’s sure the guests from the next room heard him. It’s making Baekhyun get goosebumps all over his skin, the way he automatically opens his legs wider and arches his back. He wants to know, hell he’s _dying_ to know.

“Did you also have fantasies about me?” he asks in a single breath.

“Of course.” Chanyeol answers right away, without hesitation. “You were the most present in them.”

Baekhyun stares at him. He suddenly can’t breathe anymore.

“Tell me. Tell me what they were.”

Chanyeol smirks naughtily, like he’s sure Baekhyun is going to like what he’s about to say.

“You have no idea how sexy you are when you perform. I hid backstage where no one would know I was watching you and my imagination just… ran wild.” Baekhyun keeps pressing his fingers on the same spot, causing Chanyeol’s constant broken moans, as he struggles to speak. “I thought about you pinning me down, whispering me all the dirty things you wanted to do to me. I wanted to hear your voice telling me to be quiet, your beautiful long fingers pressed on my tongue, while I cried in pleasure and frustration. I wanted you to be rough, selfish, mean. And I wanted you to look at me, just me, only _me_.”

“I _am_ looking at you.” Baekhyun kisses his jaw, tracing his bottom lip with his fingers. “God, you’re so beautiful.”

“Baekhyun,” Chanyeol calls him. He already sounds so wrecked. “Come here, I’m ready.”

He doesn’t know exactly what he’s doing, but he feels ready anyway. Chanyeol opens the condom with his teeth and helps him wear it. Baekhyun soon settles between Chanyeol’s legs, pressing against him.

When Chanyeol whispers “Do whatever you want with me” against his lips, that’s what actually gives him the courage to do it.

They aren’t in a rush, but he is so turned on right now he can’t wait to finally slide into him. And when he does, it’s overwhelming, and suddenly the fireworks in Yeouido Park aren’t anything compared to the explosions that are going on inside his head right now.

He thrusts carefully, trying to figure out what Chanyeol actually likes. He wanted to be in control, and Chanyeol let him. He’s eager to study, to understand everything, so that when they’ll do it next time it will be even better than their first.

He tries to set the pace according to his wishes, but he still listens to what Chanyeol has to say.

The way Chanyeol is eager to speak to him, to explain to him where to touch and how to move, until they meet a rhythm that they both like. And even when he’s too overwhelmed by his pleasure to even speak, Baekhyun still studies his reaction in every detail. When Chanyeol throws back his head and moans loudly, Baekhyun just wants him to keep going forever. He watches the way his eyes are speaking to him. They’re saying _put your lips on mine darling, you will kill me if you don’t_. And Baekhyun does so, gently kissing his lower lip, painting it with gracious brushstrokes like he would do on a beautiful canvas. The way he sounds, the way he bends, he was simply born to do this. Chanyeol makes sex look like art.

They don’t hold back, they moan as loud as they want. There is no one that can hear them, they are in their own world right now, where they can do everything that they want and no one can tell them to stop. And what Baekhyun wants right now is making love to him until they’re both on the verge of craziness, until they forget what their own names are.

Chanyeol takes his hand at one point, intertwining their fingers. Whenever the pleasure hits again, they both tighten the hold.

It’s not perfect, but it’s intimate. They’re sharing the pleasure together, they’re sharing their hearts and their souls. For tonight they aren’t Artpieces, there is no Museum with them in this room. Right now Baekhyun isn’t the Starchild, he is just a simple boy, a young man giving himself to the person he likes the most. There’s no way to explain how much he’s attracted to Chanyeol, he simply wants him all the time. He wants him when they’re together, he wants him when they’re not, he wants him even in his dreams.

Baekhyun doesn’t feel as nervous anymore, he quits all the studying and the unnecessary overthinking, and tries to make an attempt to thrust harder. The moans that escape from Chanyeol’s mouth is what encourages him to go on, until they find a fast pace that makes both of them scream.

It’s overwhelming, the pleasure that comes to him. It takes just a few moments for him to reach his climax, he screams in pleasure, without restraining himself. It doesn’t take long till Chanyeol reaches his orgasm too, then they collapse on the bed, sweaty bodies pressed together.

Their pants are the only sound in the room for a moment. Then they laugh, almost at the same time.

“Wow, I cannot believe there is actually something better than smoking.” Baekhyun is breathless, but he keeps laughing, holding Chanyeol closer. They are both sweaty and sticky, but he doesn’t mind.

“You were amazing.” Chanyeol tells him, hiding his face against Baekhyun’s collarbones. “ I can’t believe this was actually your first time.”

They stare at each other and they keep laughing, touching each other’s faces and leaving pecks everywhere. Chanyeol cups his face and leaves a long, endearing kiss on his mouth.

Baekhyun has never felt happier.

After they cleaned up everything else and wore some cozy clothes, they lay on the bed, cuddling under the warm covers. Chanyeol snuggles against him with an arm over his chest, hiding his face in the crook of his neck, while Baekhyun lazily plays with his dark locks.

“What do you think would happen if they found out about us?” Chanyeol murmurs, breath fanning against his neck.

“I don’t know,” Baekhyun says, now shifting his attention to play with Chanyeol’s fingers. “They would probably try to separate us. Maybe send us to other Departments, or maybe they’d give us infinite penalties so we can never leave the Museum again.”

“ _Fuck_.” Chanyeol tries to snuggle closer. “They have way too much power over us.”

“I don’t wanna lose you,” Baekhyun confesses in one breath.

“I don’t wanna lose you either.”

Baekhyun moves a little so he can look at him, admiring every feature, the shape of his lips, the tiny mole on his nose. He touches his face. He’s delicate with his fingers, like he’s touching a piece of porcelain. Chanyeol lets him touch, without protesting, staring at him with delight.

“I wish I could understand the way I feel about you,” Baekhyun whispers, as he keeps studying every detail of Chanyeol’s face. “I still cannot comprehend... you literally make me feel like I’ve gone insane. And I’m really scared because of it.”

Chanyeol frowns immediately.

“What makes you scared?”

“I’ve never felt like this in my entire life,” Baekhyun explains, putting a rebel lock behind Chanyeol’s ear. “I want to make you happy with all my being, and I’m scared about the things I could do to achieve that. I want you to crave me, I want you to need me. Because I’m scared that one day I’ll wake up and you’ll be gone forever.”

“I won’t. I promise you I won’t ever abandon you.”

Baekhyun chuckles a little, because he knows very well how vane promises are. They don’t have any control over their lives, after all, the Museum has. Baekhyun is already twenty-five, so next year he will be transferred to another Department and they won’t be able to see each other this often anymore. They will have to wait for Chanyeol’s birthday, and the idea of seven months without seeing each other is too painful to even think about it. Their time together is limited, they can fool themselves how much they want, but this is the sad truth. Whatever their plan is, it will most likely never become true.

“I’m serious!” Chanyeol takes his hand and Baekhyun stops laughing immediately when he understands how determined he sounds.. “Whatever happens, even if they’ll try to separate us, even if they push me to my limits, I promise I’ll _always_ find a way to come back to you.”

They don’t say anything more, because Baekhyun leans in and kisses him again. Chanyeol wraps both of his arms around his neck and kisses him harder, breathing inside his mouth.

Baekhyun is a foolish, foolish man. He knows he’s broken, and he has no reason to believe in love anymore, but somehow he still wants to trust Chanyeol. He wants to believe that as long as he’s with him, he’ll be happy forever.

His heart was worn out to the point where he didn’t think he was capable of loving anymore. But he was healed, by someone so beautiful, so selfless and precious, and he has no intention of giving up now.

Baekhyun lets Chanyeol kiss him again, and as soon as he feels his tongue inside his mouth, he already feels like tearing up. He will never give up. He wants to keep on being a foolish man for a very long time.

_Please stay with me forever_

The sunlight from the window is what actually wakes Baekhyun the next day, despite the fact that Chanyeol is already leaving sloppy kisses all over his nape.

Baekhyun groans, turning around so he can wrap his arms around Chanyeol’s neck and maybe get a morning kiss. He is so clingy all of a sudden, it’s almost odd.

“G’morning,” Baekhyun mumbles, still half asleep. “What time is it?”

“It’s 6 a.m.” Chanyeol tells him, leaving a quick kiss on his check. “Come on, wake up, we need to be back by 7.”

“Nooo,” he whines, hugging Chanyeol tighter. “I don’t wanna go back already.”

“Well, we can’t stay in bed all day either,” Chanyeol laughs, trying to get away from his hold. Baekhyun just keeps squeezing him. “Come on, we can do this another time. I promise next time I will wake up at 5 in the morning, just to cook you some breakfast.”

“Okay. But I want strawberry pancakes.”

Chanyeol smiles, then kisses him one last time on the lips.

“Deal.”

Baekhyun is still tired, but they get up and leave in just a few minutes. During the subway trip, Baekhyun sleeps a little bit more, resting his head on Chanyeol’s shoulder.

Just a few minutes before seven they are already in front of the Museum. They’re going up the flight of steps of the main entrance, when Baekhyun stops right in the middle.

“Wait, we still have five minutes!” he bellows, taking Chanyeol’s wrists.

Chanyeol stares at him dumbfounded. 

“Baekhyun, no. They’re gonna give us penalties if we’re late.”

“Who cares? Just five minutes, I promise you.”

Baekhyun giggles while he drags him down the stairs. Chanyeol groans but he eventually follows him. He sounds annoyed at first, but just after a few seconds he also starts laughing. So they run hand in hand, all around the Museum, till they arrive at the back of the building. Baekhyun drags him into a narrow hallway, and kisses him right away. They are still giggling, so the kiss is a little messy, way too much teeth, way too much saliva. But it’s still enjoyable because they just like each other too much.

They’re so busy with each other’s lips that they don’t even notice the big window next to them at first, the opening of a large office they have never seen before. They think they’re alone, until they hear someone walking right into that office. Chanyeol is the first to notice and quickly grabs Baekhyun’s arm, pulling him down, seconds before they’re about to get caught.

While they both sit on the ground, with their backs hitting the walls, hiding under the window, they hear two people talking. They stay silent, while they eavesdrop the conversation happening inside.

“So you’ve decided, you want a new Starchild?”

It’s Park Jungsoo’s voice, Baekhyun recognizes it right away. The two people inside the office are sitting close to the window, not even realizing it’s slightly open. When Baekhyun hears the other voice speaking, his heart almost stops beating.

“Yes, I think it’s been a little long since the last time,” the other voice says, “Plus, Baekhyun is getting old, he won’t be so young in a few years. I think it’s time to have a new project.”

After hearing that voice, Baekhyun notices that Chanyeol has started trembling a little. He quickly takes his hand careful not to make the slightest sound, and Chanyeol stops shaking.

The Director.

He has a deep and husky voice, so he’s easily recognizable. Baekhyun looks at Chanyeol in silence, and he stares back. They both understand what they’re talking about, but they restrain themselves from saying anything and keep spying the conversation.

“Have you thought about who you’re gonna choose as the parents?” Jungsoo asks.

“I’ve already chosen the girl, she’s young and pretty, so she’s perfect. I have some doubts over the boy though...”

“I might have some suggestions for you. What about Park Chanyeol?”

Upon hearing that, Baekhyun unconsciously gasps and quickly puts a hand over his mouth, hoping Jungsoo and the Director didn’t notice. He looks at Chanyeol with worried eyes, but the other simply puts a finger over his lips to tell him to stay silent for now.

“No, I already have a deal with him,” the Director says, and Baekhyun relaxes a little. “We can’t use him.”

“You can always choose Baekhyun, you know,” Jungsoo suggests.

There’s a moment of silence, Chanyeol squeezes his hand, while Baekhyun’s heart is beating like crazy. Then the Director laughs, loudly and scornfully.

“Are you insane? No, nobody touches Baekhyun, he’s too valuable.”

“Has he really charmed you up to this point?” they hear Jungsoo saying. “I can’t believe you’re this obsessed with that lousy kid.”

The Director doesn’t stop laughing, he sounds really amused.

“Aw, are you jealous because you could never get on his level, Jungsoo?”

The laughs stop abruptly, and when he speaks again, the Director’s tone gets suddenly serious: “I’ve chosen you as my adviser for this project because I trusted you, and because Baekhyun didn’t want to collaborate. I didn’t choose you because I wanted to hear you whine like a five year old, is that clear?”

“Well, actually,” Jungsoo clears his throat, before changing topic. “I think I’ve already found the right boy for you,”

There’s a few seconds of silence again. Baekhyun holds Chanyeol’s hand tighter, while they both hold their breath.

“Kim Jongin, he’s another one from Junmyeon’s Department,” Jungsoo finally says. “He’s quite handsome, tall and very talented. I think you might wanna consider him as a possible choice.”

Baekhyun closes his eyes and exhales, cursing in his head. Why do the worst things always happen to people that he’s close to? Maybe he really is cursed.

They hear a sound of fluttering paper, the Director is probably looking at some documents and pictures that Jungsoo is showing him.

“Mh, that’s actually a nice choice,” the Director says after a while. “I’ll think about it, in the meantime schedule me an interview with him, let’s see what we can do.”

Thankfully, both the Director and Jungsoo leave the office right after that. When they’re sure they’re not hearing any sound and there’s no one with them, Chanyeol and Baekhyun quickly leave their hiding spot.

Baekhyun can’t breathe, he feels the panic surging and when they’re finally far away enough from the Museum’s entrance, he takes a long look at Chanyeol.

“Chanyeol, what do we do now?”

Chanyeol looks even more distressed than him, and it’s obvious he doesn’t have a plan either.

“I don’t know,” he whispers. “I really don’t know…”

They were such fools to think they could actually be happy, that the Museum could leave them alone. They have been away for just one day, and when they get back, the first thing that welcomes them is the horrendous reminder that the Museum owns them and they can do whatever they want with their Artpieces.

Baekhyun panics again. He finds it hard to breathe, and he just wants to disappear, to take Chanyeol and run away with him as far as possible.

“We’re alone in this, nobody cares about us, nobody ever cared,” he rambles, trying to hold the tears. “Jungsoo doesn’t care, he never did. He only wanted me to be a spy so I could find someone for their disgusting project, but he’s been working with the Director all this time and… and I was so stupid to actually think-”

“Hey, hey, stop. Look at me,” Chanyeol quickly grabs his face and forces him to look into his eyes. He tries to look strong for Baekhyun, but it’s obvious he’s also almost on the verge of crying. “We’re not alone, we… we have each other. We’re a team, you can trust me. And we’re gonna resolve this together, okay?”

“We have to tell Jongin. This is…” Baekhyun is so disturbed he can’t even speak properly. “We can’t let them do this again.”

“Okay, okay, calm down,” Chanyeol waits for a few seconds, and only speaks again when Baekhyun’s breath is even again. “We’ll tell Jongin, I promise you. But Baekhyun, you need to tell me everything you know about how this project works.”

“I don’t know, I don’t know the details, I just…” Baekhyun tries to take a deep breath in order to calm down, but it doesn’t help much. “I-I think my mom talked about a deal she made with the Director, but I have no idea what that was! I think they probably make the… conceiving artificially, I really don’t know, I hate this so much!”

Chanyeol doesn’t speak again after that, he just brings Baekhyun closer and hugs him tightly. They stay close like this for a while, without saying anything. Baekhyun really tries not to cry, he forces himself not to, but eventually tears start wetting the fabric of Chanyeol’s hoodie.

It doesn’t matter how much he deludes himself. He is alone, he will always be.

They let days pass where they try to go back to their usual lives and pretend they know nothing about the new Starchild project, but they eventually agree that they’ll have to tell Jongin, and that it’s better to do it before it’s too late. They ask him to meet them in the canteen, a few hours after dinner, and when Baekhyun goes downstairs, he finds them already there. Chanyeol is sitting at a table in front of Jongin and Kyungsoo, waiting for him. Jongin looks a little nervous, Baekhyun has been staring at him all day long, he probably already suspected something weird is going on.

Baekhyun arrives at the table and he is the first one to speak:

“So, are we ready to tell him?”

He doesn’t want to do it, he hates talking about the project, but he knows that’s the right thing to do at the moment.

“Hey, what is going on?” Jongin asks tensely, looking at him and Chanyeol. “Did something bad happen?”

“I think first, we need to get in a more private location, then we can talk.”

Chanyeol gets up, and so do Jongin and Kyungsoo. Baekhyun stops to stare at his friend.

“Kyungsoo, we need to talk with Jongin _alone._ ” He didn’t want to sound rude, but this is indeed a private matter, not too many people should know about this. Kyungsoo however, seems very determined to follow them.

“Whatever you can tell Jongin you can tell me too,” he declares, without backing out..

Chanyeol looks at Baekhyun, asking him what they should do. Baekhyun is a little annoyed, but after all, he knows he can trust Kyungsoo. This shouldn’t be a problem.

“Fine,” he sighs. “Let’s go downstairs.”

They lead Jongin and Kyungsoo down in the basement, into the restroom where many important conversations between Baekhyun and Chanyeol have happened. As they suspected, it’s always deserted, not many people use it after all.

Baekhyun is careful to lock the door before anyone starts talking. Chanyeol is the one to speak for the most part. He is calm and collected and explains to them the situation in every detail. Baekhyun intervenes only a couple of times, to make sure everything is cleared up. Jongin listens to them in silence, not faltering for one second. Kyungsoo, however, is clearly distressed.

“So, if I understood it correctly,” Jongin murmurs, after they’ve finished talking. “Some Artpieces here were actually already born in the Museum, and Baekhyun is one of them. Also, the Director has chosen me to have a- a child with an Artpiece from the Women’s Department for their next project, is this what you’re trying to tell me?”

Baekhyun nods reluctantly.

“Yes, that’s right...”

“What the fuck?” Kyungsoo exclaims, staring furiously at Baekhyun. “This is so sick! Why didn’t you ever tell me about this?”

Baekhyun is dumbfounded by his sudden aggressive reaction. He knows this isn’t a pleasant thing to hear, and Kyungsoo obviously cares a lot about Jongin, but why is _he_ the one getting attacked for this?

“Because I couldn’t tell anyone, of course,” he replies, appalled. “They prohibited me.”

“Well, but you didn’t mind telling Chanyeol, right?”

Baekhyun is agape. He stares at his best friend in disbelief.

“Why are you angry about this?” he says, more aggressively than he intended to. But he can’t help it, he’s getting really irritated with Kyungsoo’s behaviour. “I don’t know if you heard a word of what we just told you, but Jongin is at risk right now. This isn’t the time to get jealous!”

“It isn’t about jealousy!” Kyungsoo shouts. “We’ve been friends for eight years and now it’s the time you decide to tell me something as crucial as this? This situation wouldn’t have happened if you just talked to someone! But you’re stubborn like always, and had to keep your little secrets to yourselves, and now Jongin is the one that has to pay!”

“Hey, stop it now,” Chanyeol suddenly appears between them, pushing Kyungsoo away from Baekhyun. “Don’t talk to him like that.”

Jongin comes forward, standing at Kyungsoo’s side.

“And you don’t touch Kyungsoo,” he tells Chanyeol, staring furiously at him.

They’re standing in front of each other, Chanyeol and Baekhyun on one side, Jongin and Kyungsoo on the other. This definitely looks like a war on two fronts.

He and Kyungsoo have fought many times in the past, especially when they were young and they got petty over the littlest things, but this is the first time Baekhyun feels this much hurt. He doesn’t know why, maybe it’s the fact that he realizes only now that something has changed between them. They’ve both grown up, and their friendship is suddenly not the same as it was before.

“Well, if it’s like that, then fuck you too,” Baekhyun says, glaring at Kyungsoo. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you, though.”

He takes Chanyeol’s hand and leaves with him right after that. He doesn’t even look back once.

It’s not even an hour later that he’s inside his room, roaming around, while Chanyeol sits on his bed and silently listens to him complaining.

“I can’t believe he had to bring that up in a moment like this!” he groans. “Like, you heard what he said to me right? “ _We’ve been friends for eight years!_ ” Like that means it’s mandatory to tell him everything? Damn, he is so annoying!”

He keeps walking back and forth, from one wall to the other, and he doesn’t even know what he’s saying exactly. The words just come out of his mouth on their own.

“And now he’s all buddy-buddy with Jongin, when months ago he couldn’t even stand him! You should have heard the things he used to say about him. He complained all the time, but now _he’s_ the one accusing me of being a bad person?”

Chanyeol is laughing, and Baekhyun realizes it only after a few seconds. He looks at him in confusion, not understanding what he’s finding so funny about it.

“What?”

“Nothing, I'm just happy,” Chanyeol says, between chuckles.

“About what?”

Baekhyun finally stops his infinite ranting and sits on the bed in front of him. Chanyeol smiles.

“Because this is the first time I hear you express your feelings so freely.”

Baekhyun thinks about it for a second, and realizes it’s true. He didn’t even think about what he was actually doing, it all happened naturally, and now he actually feels a little proud of himself. He can’t restrain himself from grinning a little.

“Maybe I’m really getting better at it,” he says.

He changed so much since he met Chanyeol he can’t even believe it. He feels so grateful that they met, that they started talking, that they are together now. It’s like a wonderful dream, he still can’t believe it. He can’t believe he’s been this lucky, for once in his life.

The way Chanyeol is looking at him is so lovely, that it instantly makes his heart beat faster. He wants to say it, he wants to tell him how much he means to him, but he still isn’t brave enough yet.

 _Just a little longer_ , Baekhyun swears. He will wait a little longer, until he’s ready, and hopefully, one day he will be able to tell him everything he truly feels.

In the next couple of days, Baekhyun manages to convince himself that things couldn’t get worse than this. But in the end, he is proved to be terribly wrong.

One day he goes downstairs, right before his performance, to the restroom where his fight with Kyungsoo happened only two weeks ago. They haven’t talked since then, and apparently they don’t intend to do it for a while. It’s like a firm silent treatment, even though Baekhyun is not angry with him anymore, they’re both so stubborn that neither of them wants to be the one to apologize first.

When he opens the door of the restroom, Baekhyun is met with what was probably his worst nightmare. They’re in front of the sinks, Jongin is leaning forward, kissing Kyungsoo on the lips, softly and sweetly, but as soon as they hear the door opening they quickly separate.

“Hey!” Kyungsoo smiles at him, clearing his voice. “How are you? We… we didn’t see you coming.”

Baekhyun stands there in silence, while they awkwardly pretend like nothing just happened.

“Kyungsoo, can I talk to you alone for a minute?” Baekhyun says quietly.

Jongin looks at Kyungsoo, waiting for his approval, and only leaves when he tells him it’s okay. He walks to the door, passes right next to Baekhyun. He is looking down, like a scolded child. He doesn’t look at all like the charming young man he was just a couple of months ago.

After Jongin leaves, Baekhyun quickly locks the door of the restroom, and focuses on Kyungsoo, who is still leaning on the sink counter, with his arms folded.

“Are you insane? You didn’t even lock the door?” Baekhyun hisses, coming closer to him, until they’re face to face. “And what if someone other than me walked in, what would you have done then, uh?”

“I’m sorry,” Kyungsoo murmurs, instantly looking down. “I was reckless, I know.”

“So what? You’re with him now?” Baekhyun sneers. “That’s why you were avoiding me so much lately?”

Oh, how the tables have turned. It was just a month ago that Kyungsoo came up with the same accusation, and still, they haven’t learned anything from it.

“I wasn’t avoiding you, you were the one avoiding me in the first place, remember?” Kyungsoo starts shouting. “I thought you were angry with me, or something, you were always with Chanyeol, sharing your little secrets and plotting together, what was I supposed to do? Jongin was the only one who truly cared about me!”

Baekhyun sighs, he really can’t believe they’re fighting about this again. That’s what their friendship has turned into, it’s just constant bickering, a constant back-and-forth of accusations, of “ _you did this_ ” and “ _well, you did this too”_ trying to blame the other for being the worse person _._ They never listened to each other’s feelings, they never talked about them, and it’s nothing but their fault if they’re in this unpleasant situation now.

“We’re leaving. I’m running away with him.”

Kyungsoo throws that sentence in the conversation all of a sudden, just like that, like it isn’t a big deal. It takes Baekhyun a few seconds to understand he’s actually being serious.

“What?”

He can’t say he’s not upset. He feels betrayed, because he and Kyungsoo have been friends for so long and he didn’t even bother to inform him about this. Baekhyun almost doesn’t recognize him anymore.

“I can’t let them do that disgusting thing to Jongin!” Kyungsoo yells. He sounds furious, heartbroken. “Don’t you understand how sick that is?”

“Of course I know, I’m the first one that knows how horrible this project is!” Baekhyun shouts back. “But I can’t believe you’re gonna give up everything, _everything_ you worked for all these years, just for him!”

“Like you’re the one to talk,” Kyungsoo scoffs. “You think I didn’t get it, what goes on between you and Chanyeol, like it wasn’t the most obvious thing ever? So tell me, what if it was Chanyeol the one chosen for the project? Wouldn’t you risk it all for him too?”

He probably would, Baekhyun knows that. But he isn’t Kyungsoo and Chanyeol isn’t Jongin.

They were both treated so unfairly by the Museum, and if something like this were to ever happen to Chanyeol, Baekhyun wouldn’t hesitate a second more and run away with him as far as possible. Kyungsoo is different though, he always liked being an Artpiece, even if he didn’t show it on the outside, Baekhyun knows it very well.

“That’s different...”

“Well, I don’t know how different that is, but I love him and he loves me, and that’s the only thing I care about,” Kyungsoo’s voice is confident, he doesn’t stumble on his words for a single moment. “We planned everything in advance, we’ve packed everything, and we’re ready to run away tonight.”

“You can’t run away from the Museum,” Baekhyun tells him. “You still have the watches, they’re gonna track you down.”

“Don’t worry, I thought about that too.”

Baekhyun stares at him in dismay. So they’re really leaving this soon. He is disappointed, thinking that Kyungsoo didn’t even consider saying goodbye to him in advance, even though they don’t even know if they’ll ever see each other again. It’s like all those years of friendship are suddenly worth nothing, like they never happened, they don’t mean anything to him.

“What about our promises then?” Baekhyun says, bitterly. “What about exploring the world together and eating the _yakidori_ in _Omoide Yokocho_?”

Kyungsoo sighs, and when he speaks again, he’s back to his normal calm tone:

“Please don’t put it like that. I’m not choosing between you and him, I’m just doing what’s the best for all of us.”

“And _this_ is what you consider the best for you?” Baekhyun finally snaps, shouting again. “Running away who knows where, without a home or money, just for a guy that’s probably just fucking you out of convenience?”

It comes so quickly Baekhyun doesn’t even realize it. A sharp slap on his left cheek, leaving him completely shocked.

He slowly puts a hand on the cheek that Kyungsoo hit, and gapes at him in utter disbelief. Kyungsoo is staring back, without showing any regrets about what he just did.

“You’re my best friend, Baekhyun, and I’ll never forget that,” Kyungsoo tells him, in a calm voice. But his eyes, glittering with tears, really show how truly hurt he is. “But don’t you dare talking about Jongin like that ever again.”

Kyungsoo doesn’t say anything more, and leaves with composure. Baekhyun doesn’t have the courage to run after him to say he’s sorry. He knows he shouldn’t have said that. He was just hurt and hurt people often say things they don’t really mean.

But it’s too late now. He made a mistake, and now he will have to live forever with the fact that these were probably his last moments with Kyungsoo.

“He was my best friend. He was my _only_ friend, actually. We met when we were sixteen and we’ve stayed together since then. I can’t believe it’s all over now.”

A few hours later he’s in Chanyeol’s room, lying in bed next to him. He is so sad tonight the only thing that could cheer him up is speaking to him.

“I know it always hurts when something ends,” Chanyeol whispers to him, stroking his hair, “and you have every right to be angry. But you have to understand, it probably wasn’t an easy decision for them either.

Baekhyun always wondered why he fell in love with Chanyeol and not with Kyungsoo. But the truth is that Kyungsoo probably never was a good match for him. He needed someone to step over his boundaries, to break down his walls and help him grow, like Chanyeol did, but Kyungsoo wasn’t brave enough for that. In the end, their friendship was terribly flawed, but Baekhyun still cherished it a lot.

“I’m not angry with Kyungsoo, or Jongin. I’m just… a little disappointed you know? I thought we were actually friends, like… a team,” he says. “But turns out we are just two couples that occasionally spent time with each other.”

They get ready to go to sleep. Baekhyun asked him already if he could sleep in his room tonight, and Chanyeol of course said yes. He just doesn’t want to feel alone tonight.

“Can I ask you something?” Baekhyun asks him, while they’re lying under the sheets, facing each other.

“Sure”

“Have you ever been to Japan?”

Chanyeol smiles, playing with Baekhyun’s strands.

“Yes, one time. I went to Tokyo with my family when I was eleven.”

“Can you tell me what it’s like?”

“I don’t remember much, actually. But I will try, if it makes you happy.”

So Chanyeol comforts him all night, stroking his hair, telling him stories about Tokyo and about his family trip to Japan, remembering a time when he was so happy and careless. He stays by his side, and when he’s finished speaking, he sings for him, quietly and softly until Baekhyun’s eyes close and he finally falls asleep in his arms.

Kyungsoo and Jongin really leave the Museum the next day. It’s a sunny day, Chanyeol is still sleeping in his bed, when Baekhyun wakes up and goes in front of Kyungsoo’s door. He doesn’t know why, but he knocks three times. Nobody answers.

At breakfast no one even seems to notice they’re missing. Some Artpieces ask him and Chanyeol where they are, just a couple of times, and they always answer the truth, that they don’t know. But after a few days the questions have stopped already, and everyone quickly forgets about the two Artpieces that used to work here, called Do Kyungsoo and Kim Jongin. It’s like they never existed, not even the managers mention them anymore, and that makes Baekhyun think that the Museum probably already knew that they were leaving. Maybe they also made a deal with the Director, and that’s why they manage to run away so easily.

He goes back to Kyungsoo’s door the next day, just out of habit, and knocks three times.

Again, no answer at all. The room on the other side is dark, cold and empty.

That’s it, he’s gone. Baekhyun doesn’t even have a picture of him. The only thing he has left are the cigarettes, still hidden inside his drawer. Baekhyun goes back to his room, takes one and smokes it alone, watching the river glimmering outside of his window. 


	3. White Dwarf

Things don’t go back to normal after Jongin and Kyungsoo leave.

Baekhyun thought nothing worse than his best friend leaving could ever happen, but indeed, he is wrong again. It’s nothing compared to what happens barely a few days later.

It’s like a déjà vu, when Baekhyun wakes up and the canteen is in total chaos. Artpieces are shouting all over each other, gathering in circles, discussing and fighting.

When they notice Baekhyun has entered, however, something in the behaviour suddenly changes. Silence falls, everyone’s eyes are now on him, looking at each other awkwardly, whispering into each other’s ears.

“What?” Baekhyun says, staring at them. “What’s going on?”

Jaehyun is the only one to come forward clumsily, bringing a copy of the magazine, Baekhyun realizes it’s a new number of  _ The Lion Heart _ .

“There’s a new article about the Museum,” Jaehyun mutters, head-down. “It’s about... I think you should read it yourself.”

Baekhyun doesn’t understand how he has anything to do with it, but he wastes a second more and opens the magazine right to the page that Jaehyun indicates.

**THE MUSEUM’S SECRET PROJECT an article by Anonymous**

_ As our team is still shocked with the previous reveals about the People’s Star Museum of Seoul, there is another secret that this apparent lovely place is keeping from us. They call it the “Starchild project”, such a simple name which certainly doesn’t describe the true horror that there is behind it. It concerns some very specific Artpieces, some of them are also one of the most known ones, like the well-established star of the Museum, that we will call B. for privacy reasons. These Artpieces didn’t audition, they didn’t sign any contract, but their parents did. And B. being one of them, is the son of two former Artpieces. He was born inside the Museum, kept there for all these years like a slave and raised as the only purpose to make people enjoy his presence. I wrote this to inform people… _

Baekhyun closes the magazine right away. He feels sick, he can’t read any further. He quickly leaves, ignoring the fact that everyone’s gaze is stalking him. They look at him like he has suddenly grown two heads. Baekhyun runs up the stairs to the dorms, he doesn’t stop for a second. Two quick knocks on Chanyeol’s door, that opens right away.

He doesn’t hesitate for a second. He smashes into his room, without even saying hello, with the copy of the magazine still in his hands.

“What the fuck is this?” he screams, shoving the article in Chanyeol’s face.

Chanyeol stares at the magazine for a second. He doesn’t pretend he doesn’t know what it is.

“So you’ve read it…”

He doesn’t want to believe it. He tries to convince himself it’s not true, it  _ can’t _ be true, that it’s probably someone else’s fault. Chanyeol would never do something like this to him, right?

“Please tell me you’re not the one responsible for this,” Baekhyun whispers, his throat is getting choked up. “Please, please tell me you don’t have anything to do with it.”

Chanyeol stays silent, he just looks at him with worried eyes, and that’s all it takes for Baekhyun to understand. He closes his eyes and exhales, trying to calm himself down.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-” Chanyeol stammers, but Baekhyun doesn’t care, he doesn’t want to hear excuses.

“I trusted you, I told you everything because I actually trusted you more than I have ever trusted anyone,” he barks. He’s so angry he almost feels dizzy. “And this is how you treat me?”

Chanyeol doesn’t look happy. His mouth parts and opens a few times. He knows he did something he shouldn’t have, he knew Baekhyun was going to be angry, but still, he couldn't restrain himself..

“I’m so sorry, I just wanted to help you. I-“ Chanyeol quavers, trying to explain. “Everyone needs to know about this, if the general public knew that you didn’t make a choice, that they forced you to become an Artpiece, maybe we can find a way to get you out of here...”

“You don’t understand! What do you think will happen to me now? That they’ll let me go, just like that?” Baekhyun yells frantically. “You think the Museum is going to stay silent and do nothing about it? The Director is not stupid, they’ll probably find out everything sooner or later, and do you think they’ll ever let us see each other again, after they realize we’re the ones responsible for this?”

It was a stupid, reckless choice and now both of them are going to pay. Their contracts are still valid for another five years, the Museum can do anything they want with them. They will separate them, they will probably lock Baekhyun inside here forever, now that everyone knows about his secret.

“What were you thinking?” Baekhyun murmurs. He sounds so desperate, too afraid of what is going to happen now. “So who’s the spy, uh? Who else did you tell, Chanyeol?”

“Nobody.”

“Don’t fucking lie to me-”

“Because  _ I’m _ the spy, okay?” Chanyeol snaps, putting his hands in his hair. “I’m the one that’s been working with  _ The Lion Heart _ all this time and helped write the other article about the vitamins. Yoona was a college friend of my sister, and she asked me months ago if I wanted to help them as an insider. I thought this was my chance to finally expose the Museum, and… Please understand me, I just wanted to get out of here, I didn’t think it would ever turn out like this!”

Baekhyun doesn’t know what to say. He suspected it, but he didn’t want to believe it. He fooled himself into thinking that Chanyeol was good and innocent, that he could never betray his trust. But yet again, he acted like a fool.

“Chanyeol, what did the Director promise you?” he asks him, once and for all. Baekhyun was the most honest with him, and now it’s time to pay him back. “That one time you made the deal with him.”

Chanyeol doesn’t speak. He doesn’t want to say it, but Baekhyun insists.

“Just tell me!”

Chanyeol takes a deep breath, lowering his eyes to stare at his feet.

“That he would end my contract in summer,” he finally confesses, in an imperceptible whisper.

Silence falls. Baekhyun stares at him agape. He knew it, this is what he was actually fearing the most.

“…You’re leaving too?

He can’t believe this is happening again. Someone is leaving him another time. First his mother, then Kyungsoo, and now him too. How is he supposed to go on with his life now? Now that everyone he loves is gone, now that he’s completely alone. He can’t breathe, he can’t even think straight.

“You’re really mean, you know?” he mumbles, not even knowing what he’s supposed to say now. “So when are you going?”

“Next week,” Chanyeol tells him reluctantly. “I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you, it was just so hard for me.”

“Oh, was it hard for you?” Baekhyun chuckles bitterly, shaking his head. He can’t believe he was actually this stupid. “So tell me, was it all a lie? You only approached me, said all those sweet words to me and had sex with me just because you needed someone to spill all the secrets to you? So you could finally have your hero moment in front of the whole nation?”

Chanyeol looks at him, immediately with wide open eyes, stepping closer.

“What? No! Of course not!” he says, talking frantically. “Baekhyun, all of this happened when we didn’t even speak to each other! A-and I swear, it was all true, everything I told you, everything I feel… I know I wasn’t the most honest person with you, but I never once lied about my feelings for you! I did this because I wanted to help you, because I wanted to have a life with you, outside of here!”

It was a love doomed from the start. They could never be together inside the Museum, so the only options they could have had was either waiting for another five years till their contracts end or running away together, like Kyungsoo and Jongin. Instead, Chanyeol tried to cheat and found another way to get out of the Museum, but at the cost of leaving Baekhyun behind.

“I don’t believe you,” Baekhyun responds coldly. There’s now a huge lump in his throat and he can barely talk. “Now leave, go live your normal life without me, like you always wanted. I don’t want to see you ever again.”

There, he has said it. He feels like dying inside. His mouth is moving on his own, and it’s making up words he doesn’t even want to say. He doesn’t mean it, he doesn’t want him to leave, of course he doesn’t. He wants him to stay, to stay by his side forever, because he knows he will certainly lose his mind in here now that he’s left alone.

He doesn’t want to be selfish, he knows that Chanyeol is his own person, and he can’t force him to stay here forever. But he has suffered too much already, he just needs someone to stay by his side.

Chanyeol looks at him in silence. Tears start appearing in his eyes, and Baekhyun wants him to stop, he wants to tell him he’s lying, he loves him and he's sorry, please stop crying, he can’t bear seeing him like this. But he doesn’t say anything. It’s so hard for him to speak when he feels so hurt inside.

“Please don’t do this,” Chanyeol whispers in a broken voice. “I love you, I love you so much, I’m so desperately in love with you. Baekhyun, you know I would do anything to make you happy.”

This is the first time Chanyeol tells him he loves him. Baekhyun knew it already, it was obvious. And the worst thing, the most terrible, unbearable thing, is that Baekhyun loves him too, and he can’t do anything about it.

“Then leave.”

Chanyeol doesn’t step back, and the ache inside Baekhyun’s chest just gets more painful.

“Please, I’m sorry!” Chanyeol is desperate, he takes Baekhyun’s hand and starts crying. Tears are pouring out of his eyes and Baekhyun can’t even look, it’s just so agonizing. “I’m so sorry I kept all of these secrets from you, but I swear I did it for you, because I love you and I the only thing I want is to be with you! Please,  _ please _ believe me!”

“Fuck off!” Baekhyun growls, trying to push him away. “I hate you, I really do, I hate you more than anyone else, I don’t care about your lame excuses. Now let me go!”

But Chanyeol doesn’t let go, he wraps his arms around him and just hugs him, rambling continuously  _ I’m sorry, I’m sorry _ . Baekhyun screams, he fights like his touch is actually hurting him. He quickly gets tired, he doesn’t want to fight anymore. His legs fail him, and he hasn’t the strength to stand up anymore, so he just falls on the ground, Chanyeol follows him, still hugging him tightly. Baekhyun’s eyes are hurting, his vision is blurry. Everything hurts, his face, his body, his chest, his head. He can’t take it anymore. The screams turn into loud sobs and suddenly he can’t see anything.

He doesn’t want him to leave. He needs him, he can’t withstand another blow like this anymore, he isn’t strong enough.

“Please don’t leave me,” Baekhyun wails, tears wetting Chanyeol’s shirt. “Please, please, just stay with me. I’m dying in here, I don’t know if I can survive without you.”

Chanyeol lets him cry for a moment, holding him close.

“Yes you can, you are so strong and you don’t even realize it,” he whispers into his ear. A sniffle, he is crying too. “But I can help you only if I leave this place, you know that.”

They could never be together inside the Museum, it’s true, but Baekhyun is not ready to let him go yet. He is constantly bleeding, always faltering and breaking, already too worn out to lose somebody again. He doesn’t have the strength to hope anymore.

The sobs stop after a while, but the tears are still pouring out.

“Hey, listen to me.” Chanyeol leans back, and takes his face in his hands, forcing him to look at him in the eyes. “It doesn’t matter if I’m far away or if we’re not together, I’ll always be with you. And I promise you that I will never stop trying. Just resist a little longer, and in the meantime I will do anything,  _ anything _ to get you out of here, okay? Even if I have to lie or kill, I promise you that I’ll get you out of here, and one day we’ll be together again.”

Baekhyun doesn’t feel reassured at all, but he doesn’t say anything. He just cries, cries, and hugs him until he’s too exhausted to even stay awake.

So, in the end, their time together really was limited, and now they are left with barely one week. Baekhyun knew already they could have never been together forever, but hell, he really hoped they could at least have more time.

They spend every moment they can together in the next days, cherishing every millisecond of that precious time, but in the end, Chanyeol’s last night at the Museum eventually comes.

They spend it lying in bed, facing each other, without much to say.

“Will you come back here and visit me?” Baekhyun asks him, tracing his jaw with a finger.

“Of course,” Chanyeol murmurs, answering almost instantly. “I’ll pay for a ticket every time, and come here to see you every day.”

“No, don’t come during the day,” Baekhyun takes his hand, intertwining their fingers. “I don’t want you to see me inside the glass case.”

It would be another reminder of their differences, of the fact that he’s still trapped in here while Chanyeol is outside, free and living his life without him.

“Okay,” Chanyeol agrees instantly. “I’ll come and see you only at your performances then. We can also see each other during your free hours, don’t worry.”

“Yes, if they’ll let me…”

Baekhyun still can’t believe this is actually happening, he doesn’t want to think about the fact that tomorrow morning he will wake up in an empty bed, with Chanyeol gone, and he will still be trapped inside here, having to be locked again inside that glass case.

“You know that I love you more than anything else, right?” Chanyeol murmurs at some point.

Baekhyun doesn’t say anything, he just kisses him right after that, prolonging it as much as possible. He wraps his arms around the his neck and pulls him closer, Chanyeol understands what he wants and kisses him deeper, longer, harder. Baekhyun groans, he pulls him until he’s lying on top of him, and he can’t finally put his fingers in Chanyeol’s hair. They play with each other’s lips, savoring the taste, moving their bodies a little, making each other moan.

They are still kissing, staying as close as they can, when Baekhyun delicately takes Chanyeol’s hand and leads it between his legs.

“Please make love to me,” he whispers against his mouth.

“Are you really sure?” Chanyeol asks, before kissing him again. “It’s gonna hurt a bit.”

“Yes I’m sure,” Baekhyun murmurs back, brushing his lips just a little. “I don’t care, I just… want to feel you.”

He wants to have him one last time, and he wants to remember it forever. So Chanyeol agrees, and they’re quick to take off their clothes, not even sparing some time to admire each other.

In one second Baekhyun is already naked, lying on his back, with one leg over Chanyeol’s shoulder, as the other pours lube all over his trembling fingers. They have still some left from their last time together. The fingers are cold when Chanyeol finally pushes them inside, and Baekhyun groans and whines, Chanyeol keeps asking him if he’s okay, if he wants him to stop, but he always answers the same thing: “No, keep going.”

It’s really uncomfortable, the way his fingers are moving inside him and he feels weird, but he doesn’t want him to stop.

“I’m sorry,” Chanyeol’s voice is quivering, while he adds another finger. “I really don’t want to hurt you.”

“Shut up, just-” Baekhyun babbles, already losing control. “Just do it.”

It doesn’t take longer till he’s ready, so he just orders Chanyeol to move and he abides, blubbering nonsense and looking like a lost puppy. Baekhyun is not pleased, this doesn’t feel like making love at all. Their minds are somewhere else, it looks like they’re just doing this to satisfy their lust, just so they can get rid of the agony for one second. Chanyeol slides towards him, nestling between his thighs.

Baekhyun gasps when he finally pushes inside him. 

“Fuck,” Chanyeol moans against his ear “you’re so tight.”

It hurts, but he doesn’t tell him to stop. This isn’t the right time to be picky, and he just wants to feel everything. This is their last night together. He wants to experience every part of him.

The intrusion hurts a lot, but Baekhyun tells him to keep going, to do anything he wants. He doesn’t care; he’s just a body, the ghost of a person, he just wants to feel loved again.

Chanyeol slowly thrusts into him, and Baekhyun softly moans against his ear. They continue like this, staying the closest they can. Baekhyun wraps his arms against his shoulders and kisses his temple, while Chanyeol keeps moaning his name against his collarbones. He keeps moaning his name –  _ Baekhyun, Baekhyun _ \- and it almost sounds just like a call for help. Baekhyun hates it, he doesn’t want to hear it anymore. Chanyeol starts thrusting faster, until it gets sloppy and messy.

It's ugly, fast, bleak, careless, almost tedious, and it ends way too quickly. They were both being too selfish, trying to feel,  _ feel _ , have it all for themselves and come undone as soon as possible, so they didn’t even spare time for some loving foreplay.

Chanyeol finds the spot that makes Baekhyun cry in pleasure, and keeps hitting it over and over. It doesn’t take longer till Baekhyun reaches the orgasm. He welcomes it all, all the pleasure and the euphoria, he prolongs it as much as he can. He wants to be able to remember this feeling forever.

Chanyeol is a desperate man. He keeps repeating  _ I love you I love you I love you  _ like he’s scared that Baekhyun will never believe him. It takes only a few thrusts for him to reach his climax, and right after that, Chanyeol hides his face against the side of Baekhyun’s neck and cries loudly, bawling and wailing, and the infinite echo of  _ I love you I love you I love you  _ doesn’t stop.

Baekhyun cannot take it anymore. He puts a pillow against his face and screams.

At midnight, they’re still lying on Baekhyun’s bed, with Chanyeol spooning him from behind, caressing his hair and trying to calm him down. They both cried for hours, without holding back. Their eyes hurt, being so red and swollen they can barely see. Their throats ache too, they screamed so much, until they had nothing left to say. Now that they let it all out they can finally rest. Baekhyun, however, feels more exhausted than ever.

It's a calm moment, the night breeze coming inside from the window, and the city outside being strangely quiet. Baekhyun can feel Chanyeol gently stroking his hair, passing his hand between the bleached strands. It’s been so long since the last time they dyed his hair that it’s now turned completely white.

“Why does everyone I love always leave me?” Baekhyun murmurs. His voice is so hoarse it’s almost unrecognizable. “I thought I would get used to it after all these years, but it just hurts more every time it happens again…”

Chanyeol wraps his arms tighter around his waist, leaving sloppy kisses all over his nape.

“Will you ever forgive me for this?” he whispers between kisses.

Baekhyun knows he doesn’t own Chanyeol. He never will, he will never try to. This is his decision, and he has no control over it. But humans are flawed, and so he is. Even if he’s accepted it, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t fucking hurt.

“I don’t know,” Baekhyun replies. “I should hate you, but I just… can’t. I think I love you too much.”

He turns his head, so they can finally face each other, and that’s all Chanyeol needs to understand what he wants right now. For him to kiss him, to hug him and to hold him until he forgets how scared he really is. Chanyeol does it all, making all his wishes come true, and they spend all of the night with connected lips, whispering sweet words into each other’s mouth, and Baekhyun just wants to remember this moment forever, until he’s old and frail, until the day he dies, until the world ends and there is nothing left of them but white ashes.

Chanyeol leaves the next morning, without even saying goodbye. When Baekhyun wakes up, all there is left is a note on his nightstand, that looks like it was written very rashly.

_ Again, there aren’t enough words I can use to tell you how sorry I really am. I will make up for everything one day. Wait for me, and I will wait for you, forever. I promise. _

_ I love you, _

_ C. _

At first he thinks about tearing it and throwing it away. Looking at it hurts too much. But when he’s about to do it, he simply can’t, that note is too precious for him. So he simply hides it in the usual drawer and goes on with his life, acting like the Artpiece they always wanted him to be.

He's back at lying again, smiling at the visitor and always having a happy aura around him. But inside he’s bleeding, constantly, enormously, and it hurts so much.

Just like Baekhyun had suspected, they’re doing anything to separate them. They add twenty penalties to his count, so he can’t even get out for a whole week. He doesn’t even know how he manages to wake up every morning and continue with his life without Chanyeol. The sun rises and sets again, and Baekhyun doesn’t spend one moment in which he’s not missing him. But he made a promise, he will wait, as long as he needs to.

Soon it will be Saturday again, he thinks, and Chanyeol promised to come to his performance.  _ Just hold a little longer, please, just hold a little longer- _

But he doesn’t know how to anymore. So, it’s only on Thursday that he completely breaks down.

There is nothing in particular that triggers it, honestly. Baekhyun is at work, being an Artpiece like usual, sitting inside the glass case and smiling at the visitors, when he realizes that suddenly he can’t smile anymore. He can’t smile and he only wants to cry, because the glass doors are too small, and they are smothering him. Why, why is this case so small, why do they have to lock him inside here every day?

He knows the visitors are staring at him totally shocked, but he can’t go on like this anymore. He doesn’t care, he just cries and screams, asks for somebody to  _ please _ get him out of here. He asks for help, but nobody is moving, they are just staring at him.

Why are they doing nothing? He is a person, just like them, why is it so difficult to understand that?

Baekhyun doesn’t know what happens next, he just sees some security guards running towards him, pushing all the visitors away. They open the glass case, and Baekhyun can finally breathe. He tries to get out, but he doesn’t even manage to make one step that he feels his body already giving up.

He falls on the ground before the guards can catch him and passes out right there. The last thing he sees is the shock plastered on the visitors’ faces.

Two hours later he is sitting in the infirmary, lying on the examination table, with Yixing on his side, trying to measure his pressure.

“How are you feeling?” Yixing asks him at some point and Baekhyun doesn’t answer him, he doesn’t even have the strength to.

He waits for a few minutes for Yixing to come back with the results, staring at the ceiling with empty eyes.

“You have terribly low-pressure and I feel like you’re not eating too much lately, that’s why you fainted today” the doctor tells him. Baekhyun simply nods. Yixing stares at him, sighing.

“Baekhyun, what’s going on? I’ve never seen you like this.”

“Nothing,” Baekhyun answers, lips barely moving. He sits on the examination table, looking at the young doctor in front of him, feeling a little reassured by his presence. “Just… have you ever felt so miserable you can’t even remember how to breathe properly?”

Yixing says yes, he understands.

“Are you sad because of someone?”

Baekhyun nods slightly. He doesn’t know why he’s saying this to him, of all people. After all, Yixing was always nice to him, he is the only person left here that he actually likes, the only person he can talk to.

“Right,” Yixing asserts with a nod. “I get it.”

“Please, can I talk to you?” Baekhyun pleads. “You’re kinda the only person that I trust here.”

Yixing doesn’t say anything. He is staring at Baekhyun in a strange way, like he knows he’s about to do something terrible that even though he doesn’t want to. And it’s freaking out Baekhyun a little. He suddenly doesn’t feel comfortable anymore, he has the sudden urge to leave this place.

“Baekhyun,” Yixing says, staring at him with desperate eyes. “I’m really sorry about this.”

“What are you talking about?”

Baekhyun stands up. He doesn’t want to be here anymore. He needs to get out of here, he needs to leave this place right now.

Baekhyun tries to leave, but he stops when suddenly two tall guards walk in, blocking his way. Between them, Park Jungsoo appears, head held high and a smirk already displaying on his face. Baekhyun steps back immediately.

“Thanks for calling us, Doctor,” Jungsoo says, as soon as he enters. “I think we are ready to proceed.”

Baekhyun frowns at him, then turns around to look at Yixing.

“Proceed with what?” he shouts, looking for answers. Yixing doesn’t say anything.

“We saw that your levels of  _ doxaphonen _ are very low these days. We certainly made a mistake when we stopped giving you those pills,” Jungsoo approaches him, but Baekhyun backs off, he doesn’t want to let him come too close to him.

Looking upset, Jungsoo sighs.

“Baekhyun, you have to understand we can’t have an Artpiece crying and acting like that in front of people, it would ruin our image.”

“What image?” Baekhyun bellows, already fuming. “Your image is already ruined, after all the shit you’ve done for all these years, don’t you get it?”

“Also, I think it’s time to make you forget about you little boyfriend too.”

Baekhyun stops, left agape for a moment.

“Wait, how do you know about this?”

Jungsoo doesn’t say anything. He just smiles at him and Baekhyun still doesn’t understand. Who else knew about him and Chanyeol? There was only-

_ No _ . It can’t be.

Kyungsoo would have never done this to him, he would have never betrayed him like this. But then, he always wondered how he and Jongin managed to escape this easily, getting rid of the watches and without nobody looking for them…

No, this isn’t real. He can’t believe it, he doesn’t want to believe it. Baekhyun panics again, wanting to leave as soon as possible.

Jungsoo stares at Yixing, the doctor giving him a quick nod. “Just a little injection should be fine.”

Baekhyun tries to run away, but the two guards grab him by his arms and push him down on the examination table, keeping him in place.

“What the fuck are you doing?” he screams, trying to fight them, but the guards are just too strong for him and they manage to hold him down.

“I advise you not to resist,” Jungsoo tells him. “This will be over in just a second.”

The guards put straps on both of his wrists, tying them to each side of the examination table, and this is the moment when Baekhyun starts screaming the loudest, ordering them to let him go, that he will kill them if they don’t.

“This is for the best. You will thank me one day,” Jungsoo says, in a calm voice, coming closer to him. “Stay still, I assure you you’re gonna feel much better after we’re done with this.”

“Fuck you, you disgusting piece of shit!” he shouts with all the air he has in his lungs. “Park Jungsoo I swear I will kill you! One day I will come back to you and I will fucking kill you, you have my word!”

“Sssh, don’t get nervous, you’re gonna cause problems,” Jungsoo turns around so he can face Yixing. “Doctor, are we ready?”

Baekhyun sees Yixing coming closer to him, with a syringe in his hand. He tries to wiggle, to pull the straps, but they are just too tight.

“No!” he yells, he tries to fight, even though he knows it’s no use. “Fuck you all, let me go!”

He starts with the screaming, with the curses, he insults everyone in the room, even Yixing, who was always so nice and helpful to him, he yells at him, he tells him things that are so horrible he didn’t even know he was capable of thinking them. But it’s all useless, it’s just a waste of energy, as they don’t falter even for a second.

He doesn’t want to give up, he doesn’t want to lose himself, or forget about his feelings. He worked so hard on them, spent months, days and nights trying to learn a better way to express his thoughts, and now they want to take it all away from him. This isn’t fair.

_ They won’t touch me _ , he keeps repeating in his head.  _ They won’t touch me, I am stronger than them, they can’t do anything to me. I will get over this, and tomorrow I will be myself again. _

But the moment he sees Yixing leaning forward with the syringe in his hand, that’s when he starts to get really scared. He gives up in a second, he’s not feeling as brave anymore.

“No, no, no, please no.”

He feels the needle against his skin and instantly starts crying, pathetically pleading and asking them to stop. He never did anything wrong. Why is this happening to him?

“Please don’t do this,” Baekhyun begs, now shedding tears. “Please, please, please Yixing, please, don’t do this. Please don’t do this.”

Yixing looks at him, and he seems to hesitate for a second. His eyes are telling him,  _ I’m sorry, I really don’t want to do this, please forgive me. _

“I’m so sorry, Baekhyun” is the last thing the doctor whispers to him, before finally inserting the needle under his skin.

Baekhyun sobs, but there’s nothing he can do now. He feels the  _ doxaphonen _ coming in, making its way into his body. He feels hazy, his vision suddenly gets blurry, he can’t recognize the faces around him anymore.

The only thing he thinks about is Chanyeol, seconds before he passes out. Yixing and all the people around him see him smiling for a moment, before he completely blacks out.

_ Years ago there was a strange girl working at the Museum, her name was Park Sunyoung. Baekhyun never knew where she came from, whether she was an Artpiece too or she just worked there, but he did know that she was just a few years older than him, and she was sort of his babysitter. She was the one assigned to stay with him when his mother was at work, to keep him company, to be sort of his guardian angel. Baekhyun never realized that maybe, they were actually supposed to keep company to each other. _

_ Baekhyun never liked her, she was always rude to him and she obviously hated this babysitting job. She never once tried to hide the fact that she disliked Baekhyun as well. _

_ Sunyoung was the one to tell him his mother had left. When Baekhyun was twelve he came back to his room, only to find it empty. Only Sunyoung was there, crouched in front of the wardrobe, folding his mother’s clothes. _

_ “Where’s my mum?” he asked right away. _

_ “She’s gone,” Sunyoung replied to him coldly. She kept folding clothes, not even looking at his face. “And she’s not coming back.” _

_ Baekhyun didn’t accept it as an answer. So he asked again: _

_ “Where’s my mum?” _

_ “Are you deaf? I told you she’s gone!” _

_ It was strange, Sunyoung’s voice sounded like she was hurt. Only when she turned around, finally stopping folding clothes, Baekhyun noticed she was crying. She sniffled, trying to wipe away the tears. _

_ Baekhyun didn’t understand why she was crying, he didn’t even care. _

_ “Why did she do it?” he continued to make questions, ignoring Sunyoung’s tears. “I’m going to be alone without her.” _

_ “Don’t you get it?” Sunyoung said, between sniffles. “People like us always end up alone.” _

_ That was the last time they talked. He found out only years later that Sunyoung was just like him, another Starchild from the Women’s Department. _

_ He never saw her again after that day. He never knew what actually happened to her. _

After he wakes up, there is nothing left inside him. All the love, happiness, satisfaction, sadness, pain, comfort… it’s all gone. He is a liar again, like he always was, convincing people he felt like a human being and not barely like a machine. He doesn’t even feel alive anymore, he’s just a mere shell of emptiness, in the shape of a person.

Baekhyun spends all his days in bed. He doesn’t sleep, he doesn’t eat, he doesn’t get up except when he has to go to the bathroom. They don’t look for him, they don’t even let him come to work or to his performance. They told him he needs time to “think about what he’s done” and they locked him inside his room for three whole days. But even after his forced lockdown ends, he still stays like this, leaving himself to rot for almost two weeks, staring at the wall, thinking about nothing.

They usually send Junmyeon with food, trying to make him eat, but Baekhyun never moves, he never says anything. The days pass, he sees the light come and go, but he doesn’t care: he is like a shadow of himself now.

Junmyeon knocks again, late at dinner time, but Baekhyun doesn’t move. He hears the door unlocking, they probably gave Junmyeon some special access on his watch so that he can enter his room. Junmyeon comes in, but Baekhyun is still lying on his bed without facing him, staring into the void in front of him.

“Good evening. I brought you dinner.” Junmyeon says, bringing a tray with some plates in. The smell of kimchi is strong, but even that is not enough to whet Baekhyun’s appetite.

“Baekhyun.” Junmyeon slowly approaches him, sitting on the edge of his bed. “Please eat something, you can’t starve forever, it’s not healthy for you.”

“I’m not hungry.” Baekhyun’s voice is hoarse and weak. He hasn’t used it in over three days.

“Listen, I don’t know what they did to you, but…” Junmyeon says, coming closer. “But please, if you need to talk to someone about it, you know that I’m here, right?”

Baekhyun doesn’t move, he doesn’t have the will to.

“Thank you, I’ll keep that in mind.”

Junmyeon stands by his side for a few minutes, until he realizes that Baekhyun is not going to talk with him, so he just gets up, sighing defeated.

“I’ll leave the tray here,” he tells Baekhyun in a quiet whisper. “Eat something, okay?”

Listening to him stepping away, Baekhyun doesn’t say anything. For some reason, though, he decides to stop him. He wants to ask him one last question.

“Wait.”

Junmyeon suddenly turns around.

“Yes?”

“I actually wanted to ask you if… Junmyeon, are you happy here?”

He hears a loud sigh again, and Junmyeon slowly comes back, sitting again on the edge of his bed. Baekhyun waits patiently for his answer.

“Happy… is a big word,” Junmyeon whispers. “Let’s say I made a lot of bad decisions in my past, and I do regret some of them. But overall yes, I am satisfied with who I am today.”

Neither of them speak for a while. Baekhyun takes a deep breath. He feels terrible, he has never felt worse in his entire life. But he can’t give up right now, not after everything that he has gone through.

“You know, I always thought…” he tries to say, it’s already hard to speak for him. “I always thought I had to make the best out of it, right? I’m not powerful enough to change the situation I am in, so I just thought… that if I stopped caring about everything and everyone, if… if I didn’t let anyone come too close to me, then I would have survived.”

There’s silence, Junmyeon looks at him, with the same compassion in his eyes he’s always had.

“But you are surviving, aren’t you?”

Those words are the last thing it takes and Baekhyun feels the tears staining his cheeks before he can stop them. They hit his pillow, they make his vision blurry. His throat aches, but he strives against it. When he opens his mouth to talk again, the words come out in a sore whisper:

“But I’m so lonely.”

Baekhyun cries for the first time in weeks. He lets it all out, he cries for entire minutes, and Junmyeon stays there with him, without saying anything. He cries for his mother, for Chanyeol, for Kyungsoo and Jongin, but most of all he cries for himself. He cries for everything the Museum has taken away from him: his childhood, his freedom, his happiness, his mother, his best friend, the love of his life.

Junmyeon stays silent, putting a hand on his shoulder to comfort him, to tell him that he’s still not completely alone. He speaks only when Baekhyun calms down a little.

“Why don’t you write some letters then? It helped me a lot, whenever I felt lonely,” he says. Baekhyun finally turns around so he can look at his face for the first time in weeks. “Take some pieces of papers and write down everything you feel. You can write about people in your life if you want, or you can write about yourself. I know you’re strong enough to fight this. Just take all of this pain, and transform it into words.”

Junmyeon stands up and leaves after that, leaving the tray with the food on Baekhyun’s nightstand.

Baekhyun waits for a few minutes, thinking about what just happened. He looks around for a second, and then he forces himself to get up from his bed. All of his body hurts, his mind is a wreck, but he doesn’t want to give up. He has to fight, fight, because he will never give the Museum the satisfaction of winning over him.

So he quickly searches inside his drawers, rummaging through the enormous amount of objects he has collected in all these years, until he finds some white sheets of paper and a pen. He sits on the bed and starts writing, just like Junmyeon told him.

He writes three letters, one for his mother, one for Kyungsoo and lastly, one for Chanyeol, because they were truly the only people that Baekhyun ever loved in his life. Of course it was a different kind of love for each one of them, but they do have something in common: the Museum took it all away from him. He lets everything out, trying to scavenge deeper inside himself. The feelings aren’t gone, they’re just a little hidden, and now it’s time to set them free.

He writes rashly, in a messy calligraphy, making typos and mistakes everywhere, but it doesn’t matter: for the first time since the  _ doxaphonen _ incident, he’s actually feeling something. He feels free, seeing all the words flowing out of his head and appearing on the paper sheet. He finishes all three of them in just a couple of minutes.

After he has finished writing, Baekhyun takes a good look at the letters, holding them under the light of the lamp, admiring his work. He seals them carefully like he’s actually going to send them. Then he hides all three of them inside the drawer of his nightstand and, with the determination still flowing in his head, he stands up and gets out of his room. He’s ready to come back.

Baekhyun still remembers the first time he went on stage. He was eighteen, young and naïve, with still so much to learn. The Director brought him there in the morning and showed him the enormous empty auditorium in front of them.

“You see, Baekhyun. This is where you’ll perform tonight, and every week of your life,” the Director said to him, walking all over the stage. “You’re finally ready. From now on, this stage will be your only love.”

And he honestly believed him, he really thought that the stage was his one true love, that he wasn’t supposed to love anything else beside it. But he was wrong, because loving something that can’t love you back was tiring and, sooner or later, all the joy of being on stage disappeared.

He wanted to love people, he wanted to be loved back, he wanted to live. He never stopped wanting to live.

There are hundreds of people waiting tonight for him. It’s been almost three weeks since the last time he performed, they were all waiting impatiently for his return. While he was locked inside his room, Baekhyun swore to never go back on stage again, but at the last minute he decided he still wanted to say one last goodbye.

He is ready, waiting backstage, minutes before he’s about to perform. Boa is next to him, supporting like always. This time, however, she doesn’t look happy at all. The Director told her what they had done to him, and when Baekhyun came to her office to tell her he was ready to perform again, Boa told him she was worried, he didn’t look good, and she didn’t want him to exaggerate. But Baekhyun had already decided. No, he wanted to go on this stage one last time.

So there they are now, after so many years, and somehow Boa still treats him like a child.

“Song title is  _ Lights Out _ , written especially for you by-“

“I know. I’m ready,” Baekhyun interrupts her, adjusting his clothes. “I’ve worked a lot on this song.”

Boa stops reading from her notepad and looks at him. She has a weak smile on her lips.

“Then good luck, my boy.”

That’s all she says before she eventually leaves. Not a praise, not a compliment like usual. Just a good luck wish, and this is really all that Baekhyun needs to finally gain the courage to go on stage.

They announce his name, the crowd goes wild as usual. Walking out slowly, he stops in front of the microphone positioned in the middle of the stage, as he carefully analyzes the audience in front of him.

It doesn’t take long for Baekhyun to find him.

He sees him there, standing at the end of the auditorium, hiding behind all the seats. Baekhyun looks at him and Chanyeol stares back.

He’s very different from the last time Baekhyun saw him. It’s been a month, his hair is now bleached white and pushed back, he’s wearing a turtleneck shirt with a white jacket on. It makes him look so regal, like a beautiful, ethereal angel.

Baekhyun comes closer to the microphone, holding it with one hand, when the music starts playing. He starts singing softly and his eyes immediately look for Chanyeol. He looks back at him.

This time his song feels different. Baekhyun can feel it too: his voice suddenly takes form, shaping and exploding like the fireworks in Yeouido Park. He doesn’t tone it down, he gives his absolute everything. Somehow he knows deep inside, that this will be his last performance.

He stares at Chanyeol all the time, he doesn’t even try to pretend he’s singing this song for someone else. This time Baekhyun is singing for someone, and he’s singing for him. These words, this melody, these feelings, everything is for him. They’re suddenly alone in the whole auditorium. Everyone else disappears, and Chanyeol is all he sees.

Baekhyun expresses all he has to say with his song. He tells Chanyeol all he has to say. The crowd is looking at him in awe, but Baekhyun’s eyes are only for him. They maintain the eye contact for the entirety of the song, communicating even when they’re so far away.

He isn’t a star anymore. He’s a white dwarf, cold and dead, alone in the vast black sky.

The song ends, and only when he hears the crowd cheering he realizes that there are other people in his room. This time they’re completely crazy, cheering and screaming like they’ve just seen a deity perform on that stage. Baekhyun doesn’t care about them, he just wants them to disappear.

He doesn’t bow to them. There’s nothing he should be bowing for. Instead, he gazes upon Chanyeol, who is smiling at him, with some tears in his eyes.

Baekhyun brings his fingers to his lips and sends him a flying kiss. The crowd screams louder, thinking he’s sending the kiss to them, but Chanyeol looks back at him, understanding who that was meant for.

After that Baekhyun turns around, and leaves the stage forever.

The lights in the changing room are so bright they’re hurting Baekhyun’s eyes. He is sitting alone in front of the mirror, waiting for someone to come in and remove the makeup from his face. He counts the seconds, the minutes and he wants to close his eyes because the light is hurting too much.

Everything is utterly silent, until Baekhyun hears a few knocks on the door, but he doesn’t get up to open it. He expected to see one of the makeup artists, but instead he sees Boa coming in. She takes a chair and sits beside him, smiling brightly.

“Wow, you really made that crowd go crazy tonight, eh?”

Baekhyun half-smiles. He doesn’t have the energy to show that he’s actually happy, but deep inside, he does feel a little satisfied too.

“Thank you. I did my best.”

“I know,” Boa says. “You were amazing. Really.”

Boa interrupts, but she looks at Baekhyun like she wants to say something else but is lacking the courage to do so. Baekhyun waits patiently, staring at her in silence. Boa looks away, like she’s almost afraid to look at him in the eyes.

“What am I saying?” she whispers. “You weren’t just amazing, that was…. a whole new experience.”

Baekhyun keeps staring at her, genuinely amazed. He didn’t think Boa would ever say something like this. This is the moment where he feels validated, this is the moment where all those years of practice and working hard are finally being repaid. Baekhyun stays in silence, encouraging her to continue.

Boa takes a deep breath, and finally looks into Baekhyun’s eyes.

“When you sang on that stage tonight… That was really something else,” Boa tells him, and Baekhyun understands she’s being sincere. He knows it from the way Boa is looking at him, like she’s about to burst into tears at any moment. “It moved me, it made me feel something. I even thought for a moment that was my merit. Like see, Kwon Boa, all your hard work is being repaid, you’ve finally found an Artpiece that could do something like this!”

She chuckles bitterly, covering her mouth with a hand.

“But I realized I have no credit to take,” she says, after she stops laughing. “It’s  _ you _ , Baekhyun. You’re the precious gem, it’s not the Starchild, or the fake persona we tried to create. On that stage, that wasn’t Baekhyun the Artpiece, that was  _ you _ . It was real, and it was beautiful,  _ that _ ’s what real art is. And I can’t believe it took me so long to finally realize it.”

Boa sounds almost tired when she pronounces the last sentence. She sounds defeated, like all of the whole world just collapsed under her feet, like she doesn’t know what to believe anymore. She looks at herself in the mirror and she doesn’t see a confident woman anymore. She sees someone who made many mistakes in her life, and it took her too many years to realize it. 

“God, how did I arrive to this point?” she says, staring at her reflection.

Baekhyun can’t say he forgives her, but Boa was one of the few people in this place that has always treated him kindly. Yes, she always treated him like a product and not like a real person, but after all, they’ve been a team for over six years. It’s hard to forget everything they’ve been through together, all the work they’ve done in all these years. Boa was always there for him, she was his manager, his ally, his friend. And it took him too many years to realize it too.

Baekhyun wants to say something to her, but they’re suddenly interrupted by a loud knock on the door.

“Oh, it’s probably the makeup artist,” Boa tells him. She quickly stands up from the chair and goes to open the door of the changing room. But when she opens it, there isn’t a makeup artist on the other side, just a chaotic mess.

“What the hell is happening?” Boa screams furiously. Baekhyun is getting curious, so he stands up too and gets closer to see what’s going on.

“Mrs. Kwon, we tried to stop him from coming here, but he’s really stubborn!”

“I just wanna talk to him for a second, it’s not a big deal!”

Baekhyun recognizes that voice. He goes at the door and peeks outside hesitantly. There are two security guards trying to stop Chanyeol from getting into Baekhyun’s changing room. Baekhyun steps a little closer and when Chanyeol notices him, he gets even more insisting, demanding that the guards let him go.

“Don’t I know you?” Boa asks, looking at Chanyeol. “You were an Artpiece, right?”

She looks at Baekhyun for a second, then back to Chanyeol. Baekhyun sees it, the moment in which she understands what’s going on. She closes her eyes, sighs loudly.

“Okay, let him go,” Boa orders the two security guards. They stare at her confused. “Seriously guys, go back to work. I’ll resolve this by myself.”

The two guards let Chanyeol go reluctantly, still confused by the manager’s reaction, but eventually they leave, just like Boa told them. Baekhyun instantly steps forward, but Boa grabs his arms and pulls him back inside the changing room.

“I think you should leave now,” she says sternly, glaring at Chanyeol.

“Look, I just want to talk to Baekhyun for a moment,” Chanyeol mutters, without stepping back an inch. “A few minutes, nothing more. After that, I’ll leave and you’ll never see me again. I promise.”

Boa seems conflicted for a moment. She looks one last time at Chanyeol and then her eyes set again on Baekhyun. He stares back, imploring with his eyes.

“Boa, just this time,” Baekhyun murmurs. “ _ Please _ .”

Boa inhales, gripping the door handle tighter.

“I’ll give you two ten minutes,” she finally says, eyes fixed on the ground. “If when I come back he’s still here, then I’m calling the security again.”

She lets Chanyeol inside, and slowly strides past them.

“Thank you,” is the last thing Baekhyun manages to tell her before she exits the room, closing the door behind her, leaving him and Chanyeol alone.

They don’t waste any more time. As soon as they hear the door closing, they clash and they hug, holding each other so close they’re having a hard time breathing.

“I missed you so much,” Chanyeol tells him, whispering in his ear. “That song was so beautiful, I didn’t know you could sing like that.”

This is the first time that they see each other after one month. One month without touching him, one month without talking to him, one month where he didn’t even know if he was even alive or not, and it was slowly killing Baekhyun. He was afraid the  _ doxaphonen _ would have erased everything, that when Chanyeol came back to see him, he would have found nothing else but a dull, tedious Baekhyun, who was just a mere ghost of the person he fell in love with. But now that Chanyeol is here, he realizes how strong their connection truly is. They can give him all the weird illegal substances they want, but it won’t ever stop him. His love is much stronger than that. 

“What took you so long?” Baekhyun’s voice is weak, already quivering.

“I’m sorry, I came here to see you so many times in the past weeks, but you weren’t there,” Chanyeol blurts out, hugging him closer. “They told everyone you were sick and you couldn’t perform, I was so worried.”

“I’m sorry. It’s just… a lot of stuff happened.”

Chanyeol releases him from the hug, to take a long look at Baekhyun’s face.

“Oh my love, don’t ever apologize. You know, you were  _ always _ , constantly on my mind.” Chanyeol holds his face, kisses his forehead, his cheeks, his jaw and finally his lips. “I couldn’t go on like this anymore, I just had to see you. I thought I was going crazy.”

Baekhyun just hugs him again without saying anything. He never wants to let him go, he wants to stay like this for an eternity.

While they’re hugging Baekhyun’s sleeve falls down a little, and it’s that moment that Chanyeol notices the bandage on his arm, which was carefully hidden under the shirt during the performance. He steps back, taking Baekhyun’s arms and looking at it in horror.

“What the hell did they do to you?”

“Nothing,” Baekhyun says, covering his arm again. “They tried to inject me with a whole syringe of  _ doxaphonen _ . But I’m fine now.”

“What the fuck?” Chanyeol takes him in his arms again. He passes a hand through Baekhyun’s hair and stamps a long, endearing kiss on his temple. “One day I will rip this place apart and take you away, I promise.”

“Don’t be angry,” Baekhyun mutters, hiding his face against Chanyeol’s shoulders. He’s tired of thinking about what happened that time in the infirmary, the only thing he wants to think about right now is him, about the fact that at least they’re together now, even if it’s only for a few minutes. This is their moment, he doesn’t want to waste it. “I’m okay now, they didn’t do anything to me. I still love you so much.”

“Me too. I love you too,” Chanyeol lets him go again, and they stand there, facing each other, hearts beating fast. “Oh Baekhyun, I have such a lot of great news I want to tell you about.”

“Like what?”

Chanyeol smiles, a smile so bright that it’s making Baekhyun’s heart clench.

“You know, I’ve been working with  _ The Lion Heart _ ’s editorial staff lately,” Chanyeol holds both of Baekhyun’s hands while he says this, not hiding his excitement. “Yoona and I have been writing some articles together, and they are interested in publishing them. Baekhyun, can you believe it? My articles are going to be published in an actual magazine!”

He looks so happy, he shines so brightly it’s almost blinding.

Baekhyun tells him he is so proud of him, because he really is, but the news is also making him sad. This is the life that he always wanted, a normal life with the person he loves. In his dreams they were both doing normal jobs, and when they came home Baekhyun would tell him everything about his day, then kiss him for hours and make love to him, slowly and softly, every day of their lives till they’d get tired of it.

But he realized long ago, on that terrible day in the infirmary, that this is probably never going to happen. Chanyeol is moving on with his life, but he’s still stuck here. After all, why would Chanyeol ever wait for him? He doesn’t blame him, he knows he would be such a burden.

“Baekhyun,  _ The Lion Heart _ ’s team has organized a protest for next Saturday,” Chanyeol tells him, looking into his eyes. “It’s a protest against the People’s Museum of Seoul and the mistreatment of Artpieces. I helped too with the organization. It’s gonna be at 3 p.m. in Yeouido Park. And I want you to speak there, to tell about your story in front of everyone.”

Baekhyun looks at him and he still doesn’t understand. Nobody has ever come back for him. People always leave him, they run away as far as possible, and then they quickly forget about him. It happens all the time.

But Chanyeol hasn’t forgotten about him, he still wants to include him in his plans.

He feels like tearing up. He always thought he didn’t deserve people’s affection, that they always left because he wasn’t worth it. But maybe Chanyeol is right, he  _ is _ worth waiting for.

“Next Saturday?” he says, already counting the remaining days in his head. Seven days. “They would probably be aware about the protest though, I don’t know if they’ll let me out-.”

“Try to ask for a permit, beg for it, if it’s necessary,” Chanyeol takes a deep breath, closes his eyes and presses their foreheads together. “Please,  _ please _ , just do it for me. I want you to be there so bad, because… well, I also have another surprise for you.”

Baekhyun leans back, suddenly curious.

“What is it?”

“I’ve found your mother.”

Baekhyun blinks, not sure if he heard correctly. He is already shaking, his hands gripping both of Chanyeol’s arms.

“What?” is the only thing he manages to say, in a weak voice. “Please don’t joke about this.”

“I’m not!” Chanyeol tells him cheerfully. “I’ve asked Yoona and other people for some help and we looked into documents and searched for an entire month, even during nights, but we finally found out where she lives now! She’s in Bucheon, and she’s fine. I’ve already contacted her and talked to her on the phone, and she wants to come to Seoul next Saturday and meet you at the demonstration!”

Baekhyun doesn’t know what to say. This is something he would have never dared to even imagine, something that existed only in his wildest dreams.

“Are you serious?” He suddenly beams, feeling the happiness gushing out.

Chanyeol nods happily. He quickly takes a cell phone out of his pocket and scrolls through the contacts.

“Here, look,” he says, already handing the phone to Baekhyun. “I can let you talk to her right now, if she picks up.”

Baekhyun takes the already ringing phone, not sure if it’s actually Chanyeol’s or someone else’s. He doesn’t know how to use phones very well - he never had one after all - so he tries not to move around too much, just holds it close to his ear, waiting for someone to answer.

The phone is calling, the continuous _tooo tooo_ sound is like torture in his ears. Baekhyun stays still for a few seconds, shaking and sweating, not sure of what he’s going to say if she actually picks up. He is scared, but he still wants her to answer the call so bad.

_ Please pick up, please pick up, please- _

“Hello?”

Baekhyun stiffens, now holding the phone so tightly it’s probably going to break it. He doesn’t have the courage to speak. He recognized her voice right away, even if he hasn’t heard it in over twelve years.

“Hello, who is this?” his mother asks, confused about not hearing anyone talking on the other side. “Chanyeol, is that you?”

“…Mum?”

Baekhyun’s hand is shaking. His vision is a little blurred and he doesn’t know if he can stand up anymore. But he takes courage and waits patiently to hear her voice again.

“Oh my god,” a shocked gasp that comes after a while. His mother suddenly giggles. “Oh my god, Baekhyun, is that really you?”

“Yes, it’s me… I-” he stammers right away. His heart is exploding right now and he’s already tearing up. “Mum, where the hell are you?”

Twelve years. It’s been more than twelve years, but she hasn’t forgotten about him, like he always thought. His voice must have changed in all these years, but she still recognized him right away.

“I’m… I’m living in Bucheon right now!” his mother laughs, he hears a quiet sniffle. She’s crying too. “My god, sunshine, so many things happened all these years and… I tried to contact you so many times, I was so desperate to see you. I tried to call, send you letters, but every time I came to the Museum the security wouldn’t let me come near you. I thought something bad had happened to you, thank god your friend Chanyeol found me and told me you were okay!”

Baekhyun gapes at Chanyeol, who simply smiles at him in return. Baekhyun is never gonna thank him enough for this.

“Oh sunshine, I can’t believe we’re actually talking right now!” his mother continues. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“Me too,” he manages to say, between sniffles. “I’ve missed you too.”

“Will you come and see me at the protest?”

“Yes. Yes, I will, I promise you.”

Chanyeol taps his shoulder, whispering that their ten minutes have ended and he has to go in a few, before Boa eventually comes back again.

“Mom, I’m so sorry,” Baekhyun tells her, not hiding the sadness in his voice, “but I think I have to go now.”

“O-okay, don’t worry. We will see each other soon, right? I love you,” She talks fast, they have too little time. “And Baekhyun?”

“Yes?”

“Say thank you to Chanyeol from me,” a beat, Baekhyun hears her laugh. “He’s… he’s a really good guy.”

Chanyeol is still standing in front of him, and Baekhyun gives him a long, endearing stare.

“I will.”

They both hang up after that. Baekhyun is still shaking, but he still manages to hug Chanyeol one last time before he leaves again.

“Thank you,” he whispers, squeezing him tighter. “Thank you so much for everything.”

“I have to go now.” Chanyeol breaks the hug and kisses him, keeping their lips pressed together for a few seconds.

“Next Saturday, 3 p.m., in the plaza in Yeouido Park,” he tells Baekhyun in one breath, after they separate. “Don’t forget.”

Baekhyun nods frantically.  _ Next Saturday, 3 p.m., in the plaza in Yeouido Park.  _ He won’t forget.

They kiss another time, but only for a brief moment, just so they can seal their promise to meet again. Chanyeol leaves and Baekhyun is left alone again.

The next morning Baekhyun makes a request for a permit anyway, even though he knows the possibilities of it being accepted are very slight. The next days are like hell for him, but he tries to tolerate it, for Chanyeol, for his mother. He waits patiently for days, but on Thursday they still don’t give him an answer. 

They don’t let him come to work and advise him to stay inside his room for the moment. After the scandal that happened with the article on  _ The Lion Heart  _ and that other time he screamed in front of the visitors, they’re trying to keep him away from the public’s eyes as much as possible. So Baekhyun spends all of his days inside his room, nervously walking back and forth, still not knowing what’s going to happen to him now.

He tries to ask Boa for some answers, but she tells him she doesn’t know either. The Museum is in crisis right now, she explains. They’ve had too many scandals in the previous months and they’re all under investigation at the moment. They have too many problems to think about, and they still have not decided what to do with him.

“They’ll probably send you away, this is the most plausible option” Boa says, and she does sound a little sad. “I don’t know honestly, but prepare for the worst.”

Baekhyun tells her he understands, that he’s willing to wait. He isn’t scared: he has already experienced the worst, whatever is going to happen now, he certainly will bear it.

On Saturday, the day of the protest, he still doesn’t have any answers. Baekhyun constantly looks at his watch to check the time. The protest will start in half an hour, time is running out.

He is starting to lose hope, when suddenly someone knocks at his door. He runs towards it, opening it in a second.

It’s Junmyeon.

“Are you here because they accepted my request?” Baekhyun shouts breathlessly.

Junmyeon instantly frowns.

“Uhm, no?” he says confused. “I don’t know anything about your request, sorry.”

Baekhyun groans. It’s clear, he’s never going out, he has lost all hope.

“Shit,  _ shit _ ! Why do they hate me so much?” he walks back inside his room to sit on the bed, sighing. He knew this was going to happen, but somehow he still wished he was wrong.

He glances at his watch. It’s almost 3 p.m. He really wanted to go to that demonstration, to see Chanyeol again, to finally see his mother after so long. But all that hoping, all that trying were useless, all in vain.

Junmyeon slowly comes closer to him. He doesn’t have that peculiar fiery red hair anymore, now it’s all dyed a regular black.

“Baekhyun, I’m sorry to interrupt you, but” he says, sitting on the bed beside him, “I’m actually here because I wanted to say goodbye.”

Baekhyun observes him, words lost.

“What?” he murmurs. “Are you going somewhere?”

Junmyeon nods.

“They’re sending me away, to the People's Museum in Gwangju” he explains, with a sad smile on his lips. “They’ve been losing a lot of money lately, so they’re selling some Artpieces to other Museums. Apparently they didn’t think I was essential enough. So I’m leaving in a few hours.”

Baekhyun doesn’t know what to say. They were never friends, but he can’t deny that he always treated Junmyeon in a way that he didn’t deserve. He always teased him, intentionally got him into trouble multiple times, and he never once apologized. He did it because he thought that he was just like the rest of them, like Jungsoo and the Director, money hungry and obsessed with the Museum’s image and reputation, but he was wrong. Junmyeon helped him so much, he talked to him when nobody was there for him, and Baekhyun never even thanked him.

“I’m so sorry, about everything” he whispers, lowering his gaze. “This is all my fault. If those scandals didn’t happen then-”

“No, it’s not- It’s not anyone’s fault,” Junmyeon suddenly interrupts him. Baekhyun turns around surprised, Junmyeon is staring intensely into his eyes.

“Baekhyun, promise me, you won’t ever apologize again for being born,” the Head of Department tells him, and those words have so much impact on Baekhyun. He doesn’t resist anymore and hugs Junmyeon right there.

“I’ll miss you,” he exhales. “You were an amazing Head of Department”

Junmyeon hugs him back. He chuckles, patting Baekhyun’s head like he would do to a child.

“I’ll miss you too. You were the most interesting guy I’ve ever met.”

They separate, Baekhyun already misses the warmth that hugging another person gives him. He wants to tell Junmyeon he’s sad to see him go, but the other is quicker to talk.

“Wait, I want to give you one last thing…” Junmyeon murmurs.

He searches inside the pockets of his trousers, until he takes out a strange small object. Baekhyun stares at it, trying to figure out what it is. It looks like a very thin pen, long and silvery, with a protuberance at the end, almost like a key.

“What is it?” Baekhyun asks, studying the object carefully.

“ _ This _ is your chance to finally run away,” Junmyeon whispers, showing him the key. “It’s what unlocks the watches. Every Head of Department has one in case of emergency, but I lied to them and told them I had lost it.”

Baekhyun looks at him incredulously.

“Wait, are you the one that helped Kyungsoo and Jongin escape?”

There’s a second of silence, Junmyeon smiles, slightly embarrassed.

“They were both good people,” he says, nodding. “You are  _ all _ good people. That’s why you deserve to have a choice.”

Junmyeon takes Baekhyun’s hand, twisting it so he can show him his palm, and delicately puts the key in his hand. Then, he gently closes Baekhyun’s fingers around it.

“Please, use it when you’re ready,” he murmurs, giving him a warm smile.

Baekhyun takes a deep breath and nods, accepting the gift.

“What about you, then?”

“Don’t worry about me,” Junmyeon tells him, already standing up. “I’ll be fine.”

Junmyeon leaves after that, smiling at Baekhyun one last time. He closes the door behind him and disappears, just like that.

Once he’s alone again Baekhyun stares at the small key in his hand. He has the chance to escape now, but he doesn’t know if he’s ready to use it yet. There are still some things that he has to resolve here.

He carefully hides the key inside his special drawer, tucking it under the three letters he wrote days ago.

Suddenly, he hears a few knocks, so Baekhyun hides everything rapidly and dashes towards the door. Boa is on the other side, already staring at him with a worried face.

“Baekhyun,” she exhales. She sounds like she’s panting.

“Yes?”

“The Director wants to see you in his office.”

There was war and there was grief, death, and devastation, to the point where the country was left with absolutely nothing. It was drained, and all the art and the museums were completely destroyed. But slowly the light returned, and there was peace, the economy busted, and people wanted something to distract themselves with. They wanted  _ art _ , something that the other countries could be jealous of, but there was no art left in a completely destroyed country.

Still, there was something that people seemed to be constantly interested in: beautiful people. Attractive people, with pretty faces and skinny bodies, with voices like angels and large dazzling smiles. Happy people, always eager to please and to put on a show. Always eager to give the people what they wanted. That’s how the first People’s Museum was created, more than thirty years ago, by a man that they now call the Director of the People’s Star Museum of Seoul.

There was a sort of mysterious aura around him. Nobody knew what his real name was, nobody knew how old he was. He was the Museum’s soul, the supreme boss, the true essence of it. He rarely showed himself to others, and almost never requested to see people in his office. So when Baekhyun heard Boa’s words, he already knew this was going to be a big deal.

He paces towards the Director’s office, his mind already full of thoughts. He has talked to the Director many times, but that man never failed to surprise him. He’s too powerful, too clever, and most importantly, too unpredictable.

Baekhyun inhales a few times and knocks at the door, the only one in this part of the Museum that doesn’t have any plate on it. He holds his breath, and continues to do so until he hears the Director’s voice telling him to come in.

He quietly opens the door, and the Director is there, sitting at his desk, seemingly busy with a pile of documents to sign. He doesn’t look at Baekhyun, so the Artpiece just walks slowly, until he’s in front of him and can sit at the single chair in front of the mahogany desk.

The Director finally looks up, peering at Baekhyun over his thick glasses, placed on his wrinkled nose. Baekhyun stays silent, waiting for him to talk.

“I see you’ve asked for a permit for today,” the Director tells him, already looking at the sheet with Baekhyun’s request printed on. “What is it for?”

“Just to see a friend.”

The Director gawks at him.

“Oh, I get it…” he hums, putting the sheet down on the desk.. “Well, I’m afraid I’ll have to refuse it, then.”

The Director pulls out a big red stamp from one of the drawers and violently marks the word  _ DENIED _ all over Baekhyun’s request.

Baekhyun isn’t surprised, he knew this was probably going to happen. That doesn’t mean he isn’t upset, though. The sheet with the red stamp lays on the desk in plain sight. He was supposed to get out to see Chanyeol, and most importantly to see his mother, after more than twelve years.

“What is going to happen to me now, mh?” Baekhyun asks, teasingly raising an eyebrow. “Now that I’m not your special money maker anymore.”

“You’re not so valuable anymore, of course, now that everyone knows about the project,” the Director grumbles, staring at him. “I think you’ve figured out already what’s going to happen now.”

Baekhyun takes a deep breath. Yes, he knew this was going to happen, it’s actually what he feared the most.

“You’re going to send me away, aren’t you?”

“The People’s Museum of Busan was willing to pay a large amount of money to have you. I think it’ll be good for both of us to have you away from here as soon as possible.” The Director scoffs, now going back to paying attention to the documents. “You’re leaving in two days. Cheer up, though, you’ll make lots of new friends there!”

“This is what you planned from the beginning, right?” Baekhyun provokes him. “You wanted to get rid of me as soon as I stopped being your precious Starchild. So now you can create another child and shape him however you want, right?”

The Director looks up, suddenly smiling.

“Oh, you think I didn’t know? About you and that Park kid?” The Director chuckles, locking eyes with him. “Baekhyun, my child, how stupid do you think I am? You were both worth so much money and yet, you were such a big pain in the ass.”

Baekhyun stares at him, completely breathless.

“I really underestimated your friend, you know? I didn’t suspect him of being our spy at all, I didn’t think he was smart enough to do it. But I guess everyone makes mistakes, after all,” he continues, signing the documents on his desk. “You two caused me so many problems in the past months that I couldn’t wait to kick both of you out. Well, too bad you probably won’t ever see him again.”

Baekhyun is so angry he wants to rip that face apart, beating it until he can’t even talk anymore, but he contains himself. He looks outside the window to calm himself down. It’s a sunny day, and the protest has already started without him.

“I never chose any of this,” Baekhyun says, mindlessly staring outside “I never chose to fall in love with him, it was just… a big coincidence.”

It was really one gigantic coincidence after all. If Baekhyun hadn’t felt hungry that night, if he hadn’t caught Chanyeol with that woman in the canteen, then they wouldn’t have talked to each other, they wouldn’t have eaten the chicken feet together, discovered secrets together, made all those tours of Seoul and they wouldn’t have fallen for each other. It’s the truth, their love started simply because one night Baekhyun found himself in the wrong place at the wrong time, but he doesn’t regret it.

Maybe it was actually the right place, and the right time.

“But I did choose to be with him,” he concludes, not even knowing why he’s telling all of this to the Director. “It was the only thing that made me feel human.”

The Director sneers and Baekhyun can’t contain himself anymore. He stops looking out of the window and instead glares at him.

“And what was your plan, then?” the Director says, between snickers. “To run away like your friends did and find a job? And how? The only thing you’re good at is looking pretty and performing, you don’t know how to survive out there.”

Of course he doesn’t know, because the Museum never taught him how to. All they taught him was how to please people, how to look charming and make a nice smile, even though it was all a lie, an act that he always detested playing. They created him, shaped him in whatever form they liked, and in all that, nobody ever stopped to look at him and think “hey, this is a person too. He has passions, dreams, hopes and feelings, just like any of us.”

How could he ever feel like a human being if the people around him never treated him as such?

“Can I ask you one last question?” Baekhyun asks, but continues talking even if the Director doesn’t agree to it. “What did you promise my mother to make her agree to the project?”

“That I would let her go, of course,” he answers casually, still signing the infinite pile of documents. “And also, that I would end your contract in advance, when you turned twenty-two.”

Baekhyun frowns. This is not exactly what he was expecting. So his mother really never abandoned him, she actually wanted him to go back to her one day? But he still doesn’t understand, why is he still here…

“Why didn’t that happen, then?”

“Because  _ she _ didn’t commit to one part of the deal!” the Director bellows, now getting visibly irritated. “She was supposed to stay away from you, but she kept visiting and trying to contact you all the damn time. That’s why I decided to terminate our agreement. But even after that she still kept calling, she even sent about a thousand of letters. One day I called her and told her that I would have kept you as an Artpiece forever if she ever tried to get in contact with you again, and she magically stopped.”

Baekhyun can’t believe what he’s hearing, he just can’t believe how much of a rotten person the Director truly is. There was no reason to do it. She was his mother, of course she wanted to see him and check if he was fine, there was absolutely no reason to act this foully.

“You’re so heartless…”

“Oh, am I?” the Director snaps, finally putting the pen down. “Or maybe I’m just trying to make business here? That’s funny, you see, you were silent when you had your luxurious room and your expensive clothes and everyone loved you and cheered for you, but now you want to call me a monster because I didn’t let you have a boyfriend? Or because I kept your crazy mother away from you?”

“Shut up,” Baekhyun hisses. He’s really losing his patience now. “Just shut up.”

“Sometimes you have to make sacrifices, just like I did, just like everyone is doing, because life is harsh, and you have to accept it!” The Director looks at him, staring directly into his eyes, not a single sign of benevolence in his gaze. “I gave you  _ everything _ , a beautiful house, a steady job, fame and a stage to perform, something that millions of people would kill to have… So maybe try to be grateful next time, because you wouldn’t even be alive right now if it wasn’t for me.”

Baekhyun has always hated it, the thought that he will forever be in debt with the Director over his entire existence, because he was the one that created him after all. It was the reason that made him stay all these years, even if he hated the Museum, what made him believe that this place was, in part, his home.

But he’s tired of feeling like he has a debt to pay. Just like Junmyeon said, he doesn’t have to be sorry for being born.

_ Love isn’t about owning or belonging to someone, it’s about trusting and respecting, otherwise it’s not love, it’s just selfishness _ .  _ And love can’t be selfish _ . He suddenly remembers what Chanyeol told him that night of their first kiss. It feels like it happened an eternity ago.

The Director never cared about him, there was never an act of love towards him. He only cared about the product, the pretty face, the voice, the money, the notoriety. Why should he ever be in debt towards someone that has always treated him like an object?

Baekhyun stands up from his chair, calm and collected, without making a sound.

“Thank you for answering my questions,” he mutters. “I think that’s all.”

He starts walking away, but once he’s already at the door, the Director suddenly talks again.

“You were very hard to control, Baekhyun,” the Director tells him, seconds before he’s about to leave. “After your mother left you didn’t seem to care about anything. So say thank you to that Park kid for finally letting me know what your weakness was.”

Baekhyun turns around slowly, and glares at the Director like he never glared at anyone else.

He understands now. The Director always knew about everything. He knew about him and Chanyeol, he knew that they had heard the conversation about Jongin, he knew that Kyungsoo and Jongin were going to escape, but he didn’t do anything about it, because his ultimate goal was to make Baekhyun suffer as much as possible, to isolate him, leave him alone without anyone to trust, so he wouldn’t be a threat for their reputation anymore.

The Director acted smartly, and unpredictably like always. But he forgot to consider one important fact. That Baekhyun is unpredictable too.

“Thank you. Have a nice day,” Baekhyun says, with a large smile, before stepping away.

The Museum’s entrance is made of a pair of large glass doors that the visitors love, it makes everything look more grandiose, more pleasing to the eye.

Baekhyun goes to the dorm upstairs, darts into his room. When he opens the door, he is already met with an unfamiliar place. This room, that has been his home for twenty-five years, now is nothing in front of his eyes. Just a prison, a cell, it disgusts him.

He frantically opens the nightstand drawer, where he hid the key that Junmyeon gave him, keeping it there like a precious secret, like he did with Kyungsoo’s cigarettes, like he did with every object that’s important to him. The three letters are there too. He takes them all, quickly folds them and tucks them inside his pockets. Holding the key with his left hand, he carefully inspects his watch, trying to find a place where it could be inserted. He finally finds a tiny hole on the side of the clock face that seems to match perfectly with the key’s shape.

With trembling hands, Baekhyun tries to insert the key in it. He exhales. It fits perfectly.

He twists the key around, until with a quick  _ tic _ sound, the watch suddenly unlocks. Baekhyun stares at it incredulously. He quickly takes it off, mindlessly throwing it on the floor, and looks at his free wrist for the first time in his life. He’s amazed, it’s such a beautiful wrist. He will certainly take a picture of it when he gets out.

He quickly gathers the last things he wants to bring with him: Chanyeol’s last note, the cigarettes, he even wants to take Junmyeon’s key. These three objects, plus the letters: everything fits perfectly inside his sweatpants’ pockets. He decides not to take anything else, these are the only memories of his place he wants to bring with him.

He prepares to leave, but when he’s already at the doorway, Baekhyun decides to turn around to spare one last glance.

He looks at the large double bed where he used to sleep beside his mother, where he and Kyungsoo smoked countless times and laughed together, where Chanyeol cried for him that night, when he got brave enough to reveal his secret. The window that faces the Han River, where he used to watch the fireworks from Yeouido Park. The room where he and Chanyeol first kissed.

He had a nice life. But now it’s time to leave it all behind. The Starchild is dead. From now on, he is just a regular person by the name of Byun Baekhyun.

_ Goodbye _ .

Baekhyun closes the door. He promises to never go back inside again.

While he’s going downstairs, he fastens his pace. He’s determined now, nothing is going to stop him. He’s angry, frustrated, and he swears he’s never going to forgive them. Not the Director, not any of them. This is his life, he’s the one in control again.

Thankfully, once he’s downstairs, nobody seems to pay attention to him. Baekhyun keeps walking, with his head held high. He sees the glass door at the end of the hallway in front of him, and he knows, this is his chance to finally run away.

“Hey, where are you going?” there is a staff member passing by, someone from security maybe, that notices him right before he gets in front of the Museum’s entrance. Baekhyun ignores him, he doesn’t have time for this. He knows they’re gonna try to stop him and even if they do, he swears he will never stop trying. Every day, hour, minute of his life, he will never stop trying.

There’s a fire extinguisher attached to the wall, a few meters before the entrance. It will be hard to break the glass with it, but it’s the only option. When Baekhyun takes it off from the wall, that’s when the security guard suddenly notices something’s wrong with his behaviour.

“He’s gonna run away, he’s trying to break the doors!” the guard screams, running back and forth. Whatever, Baekhyun doesn’t have time to think about that.

He comes closer to the doors, stares at them for a second and then, finally hits the glass. One, two, three strikes against the glass, with the fire extinguisher’s back. The glass trembles, but still doesn’t break. Two, three. He  _ will _ get out of here. He needs to, he promised Chanyeol he will be there in time of the protest, he promised his mother too. This is the only thing he cares about right now.

Suddenly a loud alarm starts ringing, and Baekhyun turns around, sees the security at the end of the hallway, already running towards him. He has to be fast.

Baekhyun clenches his teeth, takes a deep breath and assaults the glass door with everything he has. He gives them repeated fast strikes, until the glass finally starts cracking. He turns around, the security is shouting, and they’re running towards him. Park Jungsoo is also there with them.

Baekhyun doesn’t stop, he gives twenty, thirty strikes with the extinguisher. Finally, after what feels like an eternity, the glass doors shatter into a million pieces. Baekhyun throws the fire extinguisher away and covers his face, while the glass crashes down with a deafening noise.

When he looks again, there is no door in front of him. It’s a beautiful summer day, the sun is up in the sky and there are no clouds around it.

Baekhyun smiles. He is free.

Right before he manages to make one step though, someone catches his wrist.

“Baekhyun, calm down, okay?” Jungsoo tells him, trying to drag him back inside. “Let’s talk about it more reasonably.”

Baekhyun glares at him. Jungsoo isn’t his friend, he never was. Kyungsoo was his friend and they made him leave, they convinced him that the best thing he could do to save the person he loved was running away and it broke Baekhyun’s heart. It’s their fault if Baekhyun was left alone, no one else’s.

Baekhyun doesn’t think about it twice and spits directly on Jungsoo’s face. The Head of Department yanks away disgusted, he lets go of Baekhyun’s wrist and that gives him the perfect chance to run.

Baekhyun rushes outside, running as fast as he can. It doesn’t matter that he’s only wearing sweatpants and a cotton t-shirt. It’s a warm day outside, he feels so happy. Some security guards are following him, running behind to try to catch him.

Baekhyun just runs, runs. He doesn’t care how tired he is, he has to run.

Thankfully, he knows this neighbourhood well enough to know where he is supposed to go. He needs to arrive in Yeouido Park, to the protest, to his mother, to Chanyeol. He isn’t thinking about anything else right now.

Baekhyun takes quick turns in the street, trying to leave behind the security guards. He collides with some passers who shout angrily at him, and he even stops to say sorry.

He hears some police sirens in the distance, and deep inside, he hopes they’re coming for the Director. He doesn’t care, he has to run.

After he’s been running for a few minutes, Baekhyun stops to look back and sees no sign of the guards behind him. He doesn’t slow down though, he  _ can’t _ slow down, not until he has arrived at the protest. The adrenaline is too high right now he thinks he could run forever.

_ Baekhyun is born on the 6 _ _ th _ _ of May, in the infirmary of the People’s Star Museum of Seoul, his existence still being kept a secret. His mother screams, cries, she still wants to hold him in his arms after he’s born. He is going to be such a special child. _

_ Chanyeol is born on the 27 _ _ th _ _ of November of the same year, on a cold night in Seoul. His mother, his father and his sister are all gathered around to greet him into the world. He is going to be such a special child. _

_ Baekhyun is twelve when he is left completely alone, after his mother is gone. He needs to become an adult soon, to make everyone proud. He is suddenly busy all the time: they teach him how to sing, how to play the piano, how to dance, how to greet people, how to talk politely, how to be nice to them. _

_ Chanyeol is twelve when his parents give him his first guitar as a birthday gift. He loves it, cheers all around the house, shows it to his sister to make her jealous. The guitar is still too big for him, it barely fits in his arms. _

_ Baekhyun is sixteen when he’s mindlessly walking in the part of Museum where they hold the auditions for new Artpieces. He shouldn’t be here, but he was bored, and he didn’t have anyone to talk to. He finds a short guy with black hair, sitting outside of one of the examination rooms, trembling and staring at the ground. _

_ “Don’t be nervous,” he tells him. “I’m sure you did great.” _

_ “Are you an Artpiece too?” the short guy asks him. _

_ Baekhyun nods right away. “I am. I’m Baekhyun.” _

_ “Cool.” The short guy replies with a smile. “My name’s Kyungsoo, nice to meet you.” _

_ Chanyeol is sixteen when he gets his first kiss. Oh Sehun is really handsome, he’s a nice guy in his class, who often asks him to sit next to him at lunch and walks him home every day. On a spring day in March, while they’re walking home with their backpacks on, Chanyeol gathers the courage to confess that he likes him. Sehun doesn’t say anything, he just drags him into a hallway and kisses him on the lips. _

_ Baekhyun and Chanyeol are both nineteen when they meet for the first time. Baekhyun is eating breakfast alone, when a tall, lanky guy with auburn hair suddenly appears in front of him. _

_ “Are you Baekhyun?” the guy asks him. _

_ “Yes?” _

_ “So you’re the special child everyone talks about?” _

_ Baekhyun doesn’t know how to respond to that. _

The passers keep increasing, the crowd around him slowly gets more numerous. There are some people with their faces painted, someone is screaming, someone else proudly holds their signs high in the air.  _ People aren’t objects _ , some of them say. 

Baekhyun runs, runs. The crowd is getting so thick he has no other option but to slow down. He looks around for a moment, fascinated by the amount of people present. They’re protesters, and they’re angry, just like him. There are so many people around him that the security guards will probably never find him here.

Baekhyun finally stops running, once he realizes he has made it. He is at the plaza in Yeouido Park. He is at the protest.

They prepared a large stage at the centre of the place, with all the people gathered in front of it, screaming, cheering, laughing, it’s like a big happy party.

Still panting, Baekhyun quickly looks around, desperately looking for Chanyeol. He is here, he  _ has _ to be here. There are too many people around him, he can’t spot him anywhere like this. He searches with his eyes, trying to make his way between people and the written signs, but he still doesn’t find him, until he hears someone speaking from the stage. Baekhyun turns around, he recognizes that voice right away: it’s Im Yoona, shouting into a megaphone.

She says something about how they can’t tolerate this mistreatment, that even Artpieces need to be treated like human beings. They should be free to have a choice, they should be free to fall in love. Everyone cheers and shouts, agreeing with what Yoona just said. Baekhyun stares at them mesmerized.

There are a few people standing on that stage, and Baekhyun notices it only when Yoona stops talking.

He finally spots Chanyeol on the stage. He steps forward, leans to talk into the microphone:

“Hello, my name is Park Chanyeol, I am a former Artpiece,” he says in front of everyone. “Today I am here to tell you my story.”

The crowd shouts and howls again, clapping their hands, raising their sings.

Chanyeol smiles happily, and looks around with shiny eyes, staring at the amount of people that came today to protest. While he’s scanning the crowd, he finally notices Baekhyun in the middle of the large gathering. Baekhyun stops breathing. He is so stunning.

They look at each other for a second, Baekhyun beams at him and Chanyeol smiles back. Everything around them disappears, the crowd, the noises, there’s nothing else, only Chanyeol in his world.

He is there, Baekhyun sees him, and he is real.


	4. Epilogue

“Do you think they will receive it?”

“Yes, I’m pretty sure that’s where they live now.”

“Okay.”

Baekhyun takes Kyungsoo’s letter out of his pocket. He trembles a little, as he tries to push it into the post office box. He takes it back before he can fully insert it.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Chanyeol asks, gently stroking his hair.

“I don’t know, what if he has forgotten me, or something?”

Chanyeol laughs, wrapping an arm around Baekhyun’s shoulders so he can bring him closer and kiss his temple.

“Baekhyun, it’s only been four months,” he says against his ear. “Plus, how could anyone  _ ever _ forget you? Look at you, you’re so charming!”

“Fine, I’m sending it!” Baekhyun suddenly snaps, pushing Chanyeol away and sending the letter in an instant. “See, I did it, are you happy now?”

Chanyeol doesn’t stop laughing.

“So happy,” Chanyeol tells him, putting a strand of Baekhyun’s newly dyed black hair behind his ear. “Really. I’m so proud of you, Hyun.”

Baekhyun can’t resist him when he says things like that. He wraps both of his hands around his torso and presses his face against his chest. Chanyeol hugs him back, squeezing him until there is not a millimetre of space left between them. They stay like that for a moment, without talking, until they hear a loud thunder in the sky. Baekhyun groans against Chanyeol’s shirt. He doesn’t want to let go this soon.

Baekhyun has already given him his letter a long time ago. It was a sunny day when they were alone in the back garden, they read it out loud and they cried together, and from that moment, Baekhyun has sworn he’s never going to let him go ever again. Chanyeol promised back. They have a promise now, and this time Baekhyun is ready to commit to it.

“Come on.” Chanyeol leaves a kiss on the top of his head. “Let’s go home.”

It’s been three months since the Museum closed and everyone returned to their homes. The protest was a success, and it actually brought more awareness to the public. The Director was charged with various crimes and arrested. Baekhyun had to do an infinite number of interviews, with lawyers and journalists, and they watched everything happen on tv, sometimes even staying awake all night long. They cried and they hoped, but when everything ended, it felt so good.

Baekhyun is still not completely free, though. His days are still full of trials and interviews, of annoying journalists camping outside of his house and articles coming out every day accusing him of lying, but it doesn’t matter. At least he’s with Chanyeol now, that’s all he cares about.

Baekhyun went to live in Bucheon with his mother, while Chanyeol still stays in Seoul. He works for  _ The Lion Heart  _ now, sharing his experience and writing about his life as an Artpiece in a People’s Museum. Baekhyun hates the fact that they’re separated now, but Chanyeol promised to call him every day, and whenever he’s free, he takes the first train for Bucheon and visits him at least once a week. It's not a perfect situation, but Baekhyun has learned to love his time separated from Chanyeol, all the calls late at night where the they tell each other about how their day went, all the  _ I love you _ s said right before hanging up, all the kisses stolen in front of the station, when Baekhyun doesn’t want to let him go back to Seoul _.  _ Sometimes he stays over for the whole weekend, and those are the times that Baekhyun enjoys the most.

They arrive in front of the house as soon as the first raindrops are already starting to fall.

Chanyeol knocks at the door and Baekhyun’s mother is at the doorway in a few seconds, greeting them with a huge smile.

“Boys, you’ve made it!” she exclaims, taking Chanyeol in her arms for a quick hug. “I heard the thunders, I was so worried!”

“We’ve made it in time, thankfully! We even managed to buy everything from the grocery store,” Chanyeol says, leaving the shopping bags on the kitchen table.

Baekhyun’s mother then hugs him, squeezing him and patting his head like he’s ten again.

“How are you, my sunshine?” she whispers, holding him closer.

Baekhyun hugs her back, taking a deep breath and savouring the moment.

“Good. I’m really good.”

And it’s the truth. He’s good when he’s home with his mother on a lazy afternoon, talking about their experiences and everything that they missed about each other in all these years. He’s good when his mother tells him that she really likes Chanyeol, to the point where she insists to make him stay over every time he visits. He’s good when he sings with her, now that his voice is fully mature enough to accompany her while she plays the piano in the living room. They love to sing  _ Only Forever _ together, it’s their favourite.

This is the life he has always wanted, with the people that he loves the most. There are still so many things that he wants to do in his life, but he has all the time to do it.

“Ah, Chanyeol, Baekhyun told me you’re really good at making  _ tteokbokki _ !” Baekhyun sits at one of the chairs, while his mother and Chanyeol take all the groceries out of the bags. “Do you maybe want to help me?”

“Oh yes, absolutely!”

Chanyeol’s smile is the brightest whenever someone asks him to help them with something. Baekhyun looks at him and he feels so in love. Such a beautiful soul for such a beautiful boy.

Chanyeol and his mother cook dinner together, while Baekhyun silently watches them. The rain outside is getting heavier and the sound of the thunder is making a nice background music.

Baekhyun watches the raindrops hitting the windows, the lovely and warm kitchen where his mother and Chanyeol are cooking side by side, talking about  _ tteokbokki _ and laughing together.

He smiles to himself.

He’s finally home.

_ Dear Chanyeol, _

_ I don’t know exactly what I’m doing here. There are too many things that I wanted to tell you, too many things that I left unsaid, but in the end, it was always too hard for me to open up. So all I’m left now is this unbearable heartache in my chest, because I miss you so much. I miss your smile, I miss the smell of your clothes, I miss your mouth, your tongue against my skin, my hand between your thighs, my breath on your neck. _

_ I’m so afraid that one day I’m gonna forget about all of this, worse even than that, I’m terrified about forgetting how all of this made me feel. You made me feel alive, you made me feel human. And I’m not ready to give all of this up yet. _

_ Chanyeol, I have spent all my life inside my room. It made me feel comfortable, because it was the place where I grew up, where I had everything I needed. And because I knew it so well, it didn’t scare me at all. _

_ But only now I realize, this was never my home, it was just a place where I was locked, where I was forced to live for over twenty-five years without any choice whatsoever. You’re my home, you’re the only person that has ever made me feel like I really belonged somewhere. _

_ I’m writing this down in hope I will never forget how you made me feel. But in case I do forget you one day, please forgive me, but I want you to know that you’ll be forever home to me. You were my first kiss, my first love, my first everything, the love of my life, my sweet angel, who came and saved me from that miserable life I was living. I would have died hopeless and lonely if it wasn’t for you. I would have never known what it feels to be kissed under the moonlight, I would have never experienced true love and what it feels to give your entire soul to another person. Giving my soul to you was the best thing I’ve ever done, it’s what made me the person I am today, and I won’t ever regret it, as long as I’m alive and breathing. _

_ I think I saved you that night, and somehow you saved me too. _

_ Please come back to me, I miss you so much already. I secretly dreamed for a long time about us being happy forever, but even if it’s not the case, please know that I don’t regret anything. Even after all the sadness, all the darkness and the pain I’ve experienced, the only thing I’m sure of is that loving you was the greatest honour of my life. _

_ I love you I love you I love you _

_ Forever, Baekhyun. _

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for everyone that made it till here, you are the true hero !! I’m trying to reply to all of the comments (slowly) but know that every single one of them made me happy and brightened my days! Thank you all really, from the bottom of my heart  
> My twt is @_mlyssa_ if you wanna chat through dms, I promise I don’t bite <3


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